I 've been married 2 years now. And it's like our relationship is the same way before we got married. I moved in with her (big mistake) everything is still in her name I help pay bill in her house. But this is what kills me, she cant understand this. She makes almost 3 times what i bring home. We still have separate account which i have no problem with. But when we going to start something together. I've been married 2 years i dont even know what she bring home. It's Like she doesn't want to pull together, all her stuff is a secret, but she want know everything that go on with the money i make. So why are we married is my question. Then she has the nerve to say my problems aint her problem. If i run low on cash because i only get paid once a month. I have to ask her like i'm a kid. So tired of this. I can move out get my on place for this is going, she doesn't want this marriage to grow. But she claims she loves me so much. Because we could have stayed dating for this. Do you think it's something i'm doing or should i leave.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. I think we're a long way from asking should you stay or leave? You haven't told us anything that even comes close to begging that question. Is there something more to why you would be thinking of leaving her?

As far as the money issues go, if she really loves you like she says, leverage that. Tell her you love her too and want to understand why she is keeping you out of her side of the finances. Tell her you want to be honest with her about how it makes you feel, and need her to be honest with you about what fears or concerns are keeping her from letting you in. you will soon discover the extent to which she is willing to be honest.

My cracker jack opinion, based on a lone paragraph of information, is that she is hiding something in her finances that she doesn't want you to know about. It may not be anything big. It may not be anything wrong. But it may be something she suspects you would take issue with and doesn't want you to have a say about. My wife and I didn't combine finances until over two years into our marriage either. I found out afterward that she had gotten us into tens of thousands of dollars of debt. But it's my own fault as much as hers, because I didn't want to combine finances earlier because I didn't want her to know everything I was doing either. It's a mess. You have to be able to work together, or things will not work. Don't be afraid to tell her that. That's what marriage is.

If you are only making 1/3 of what she does then I would think you should pay 1/3 of the bills. If "everything" is in her name--then all the bills are in her name, right? Give her 1/3 of what is owed.

Did you move into a home that she owns? Doe she have a mortgage?