He cheated 5 times with 2 different women.

After he was confronted about OW #2, he was in withdrawal, and I forgave him immediately (pre-MB) which is why there were 3 more D-Days. But he never did confess....and it took my drawing the line in the sand ~~~ finally ~~~~ after D-Day #4 to 'help' him choose to break his addiction.

I gave up. I was ready to go it alone and told him so.

He seems to have chosen to change.

According to Stanley's description, my H was/is a serial cheater. If I were like MEDC and refused to forgive strike 2, I would not have suffered strike 3 and strike 4 because I would be divorced by now.

But it appears now that H was addicted to the woman, (OW#2) not the general fantasy of 'affairs' in general. If he was, he probably would have continued with OW#1 even if he did not like the sound of her voice when he first talked with her after months of an online EA (in 2000).

Thanks for asking, Mel. You've inspired me to read the thread on Dr. Harley's radio segment about serial cheaters and possibly discuss this more there....hope that's OK.

I am concerned about Dispair...hoping she comes back. Don't want to TJ this any more than I may have already.

Thanks,
Ace

Edited to add: I just posted to that thread about Dr. Harley's radio show on Serial Cheaters.