What kind of device would I get? Where should I hide it in his truck? I don't think the conversations go on much in his truck as usually there is a kid in with him.

This is NOT petty.

It is the smart thing to do.

You need to know what you are dealing w/.

~ Marsh

Read through this thread----> LINK

You could put a devise under his seat, and when he's ready to go out, keep all the kids w/ you.

How many children do you have? And what are their ages?

~ Marsh

I don't know if I can keep spying on phone records, etc. I am the type that likes to get things out in the open and resolve conflict. I didn't talk to him for a week when I caught him lying to me several weeks ago, and it almost killed me. I have tried meeting his emotional needs, especially physically. I went with him to a financial seminar, that I didn't want to go to. I've also tried to be admiring and complementary. Other than the phone records, I haven't been snooping, but things pop up. Receipts for lumber, etc. His buddy he hired for her to help with her house called our house asking for my husband. I asked a few questions and found out my husband was helping with the work. When I asked him about it he lied. I'm not sure if I can handle much more of this.

From Spying 101

"Recording in the car.

You will want a small digital recorder for this one. Again something that is voice activated is a must. Some of these come with a microphone, and they will work best, but not a requirement.

The most important thing with recording in the car is trying to get the recorder closest to the driver as possible and remaining concealed. This is why the recorder that comes with a very small microphone works best. You can hide the recorder, and keep the microphone out enough to pick up audio.

My recommendation for set up: If you have an external microphone. Velcro the recorder under the dash below the steering column. Run the mic wire up the steering column as close to the driver as you can without giving it’s location away.

If you do not have and external mic. Tape or fix to the underside of the driver seat (Microphone facing down, and as close to the center of the car as you can.

Again make sure voice activation is on, and volume and audible warnings are OFF!"

4 kids-- 2 teens, 2 preteens.
The two older work with him in the evening so there is pretty much someone in the vehicle with him. He sets them to work and then walks around checking things. That's when he does most of his talking.

Ok, You're going to need to gather intel quietly.

The trouble w/ letting your H know how you are spying on him, is that it will only force their A (if there is one) to go further underground.

If they are having an A you need to find out so you can expose it.

You might want to consider seeing a doctor and getting on AD's to help w/ your anxieties.

If this is an A, you will need all the calm and strength, you can muster.

((((P63))))

~ Marsh

MY WH husband was getting foot rubs and back rubs from his 'friend' too that was like family to him... Behind my back nonetheless.

There is something fishy going on if he is lying. Listen to all these good people and gather as much evidence as you can.

What all does a voice activated device pick up. He watches TV while talking on the phone while I'm at work. How long do these devices continually record

Did you click on the link I left you above?

I just bumped the thread up...it's called spying 101

Here's the first post...

(Spying 101): This should get you started.

1. The Keylogger: Primarily used for tracking Internet activity, email, web chat.There are two kinds of keyloggers that I am aware of software, and hardware.
The software logger: : Is a program that silently runs on a computer recording screen shots, emails sent and received, webchat, etc. This will work 95% of the time. Only downside to software is it can be detected by other anti-spy software, and/or the real computer geek, or someone that suspects they are being monitored. ($100.00)

Harware logger : This little device connects at the back of you computer in-line with you keyboard usb or ps2 plug. This device simply records the keystrokes from your keyboard only. This will get you less information than the software version, but will not be detected by software. Can be physically seen if you spend time looking at the back of your computer. ($50.00 – 70.00)

Audio recorders: 2 types: cassette or digital. Only real advantage the cassette has over digital would be cost, and capability to run longer. Due to the fact the digitals are typically small. The batteries are also small (1 or 2 AAA). Result limited amout of audio before the battery dies.

If you are recording in a fixed location like a house phone, the cheaper radioshack cassette recorder will work great. Go to radioshack and purchase a handheld recorder MUST HAVE VOICE ACTIVATED RECORDING. ($30.00)

A phone splitter: little plastic thing that goes in the phone outlet allowing more than one device to be attached to the wall. ($2.00)

2-6 foot phone cord.

1 or 2 cassette tapes 120 min or 180 min long. ($5.00)

Phone recording jack: Little device that allows the phone cord to connect to the microphone of the recorder. ($5.00)

Once you have this. Find the most inconspicuous place to connect to the phone system. I.E. behind a bed, under a desk, etc…

Connect the wall splitter to the wall (now you have 2 jacks to connect to) If you have a phone connected there re-connect it. Also connect your extra piece of phone cord to the other remaining available wall jack.

Here is where I chose to get a box. In the box goes the remaining:

Connect the other end of the phone cord to the input of the phone recording jack.

Now connect the headphone type plug on the phone recoding jack to the recorder.

Plug in the audio cassette, turn on the recorder, set it for voice activation. TURN THE VOLUME ALL THE WAY DOWN.

Now whenever you receive or make a phone call (From any phone at the same number that outlet is associated with) will be recorded.

KEEP IN MIND YOU CAN ALSO DO THIS WITH A DIGITAL RECORDER.

Just watch those batteries.

Recording in the car.

You will want a small digital recorder for this one. Again something that is voice activated is a must. Some of these come with a microphone, and they will work best, but not a requirement.

The most important thing with recording in the car is trying to get the recorder closest to the driver as possible and remaining concealed. This is why the recorder that comes with a very small microphone works best. You can hide the recorder, and keep the microphone out enough to pick up audio.

My recommendation for set up: If you have an external microphone. Velcro the recorder under the dash below the steering column. Run the mic wire up the steering column as close to the driver as you can without giving it’s location away.

If you do not have and external mic. Tape or fix to the underside of the driver seat (Microphone facing down, and as close to the center of the car as you can.

Again make sure voice activation is on, and volume and audible warnings are OFF!



GPS (global positioning system): Used to track vehicle’s location by referencing multiple satellites. 2 main types of GPS units available are recorders and real time. Both mount to the vehicle typically by magnet.

Recorded GPS : This is the cheaper of the 2, and will recorded location in timed intervals, and must be connected to a computer after use for data download. Software will pull the location and time off the GPS unit, and show you on a map where and when the car’s movement.

Real Time GPS : This unit cost more, and may require an internet access fee to access the Real Time location of the GPS unit via the internet. Very Cool, but also abit pricey!

Other options:

Don’t want to deal with any of this? Consider a private investigator.

Got Nextel? You can install free software, and locate a lot of these phones via the internet real time! http://www.accutracking.com/

This should be enough to get you pointed in the right direction, and commonly used devices available.

Cover your tracks when purchasing any of these items. If possible have a friend purchase, and pay them with cash!

Yes, I read quite a bit of that post. I'm just concerned if I set it up in the bedroom where he talks on the phone, the TV will activate the recorder and all I'll get is the TV. I guess I'll have to check online for the recorders and see how long a digital one records.

Ok, I see.

Well, try to put the microphone where he usually sits to talk. Hopefully it will be away from the TV, and that will make the difference.

~ Marsh

I'm looking into the recorder and I'm leaning toward one that will record the home phone since I can check cell records. I guess I'm just afraid of him finding it.
I'm not a very good at bluffing. How I feel is usually written all over my face and body. People can read me like a book. I was trying to continue plan A, but I just couldn't bring myself to look or talk to him. So I withdrew. Luckily I had to take a daughter somewhere so that ate up about 1.5 hours. When I got home, he went to work. I think he was attempting to patch things as he called to get a warranty that should have been taken care of long ago.

He tends to patch things up just enough to make me think things are different then he goes back to the same old same old. I'm stupid enough to get a crumb and go rushing in willing to accept anything he puts out there. Sometimes I think I can sort of understand why a physically abused woman keeps going back (FYI -I haven't been physically abused) The woman gets a crumb of hope, and because she desperately wants the wonderful life that's been promised she runs back to him. Only to get abused again and so goes the cycle. I've been learning that actions speak louder than words. Unfortunately, I'm still listening to the words. But, at least I'm now looking for actions to follow. I probably sell myself short in the relationship. Thinking that I don't have much of a say in things.

check the laws of your state as in most places recording a conversation without the persons consent is a serious crime. If you decide to do this...use cash to buy the recorder and deny placing it there if it is found.

Be careful.

I know in this state it is legal to record as long as one person in the conversation is aware. Not sure about if the device is in my home. Have to check on that.

well, if you place a recorder in his car or in your home to capture his conversations with the OW, NEITHER of the parties being recorded will be aware of the recording or have offered consent. Be careful.