Loves me but not in love

confused

goes out with friends

rejects all acts of affection

using dating web site (talked me into it too, tried for a couple of days, changed profile to married and started same thread. I was interesting but not a lot of help, this site was recommended by a couple level headed people)

says I suffocate her. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Welcome. Can you provide a little more information?

Also, you really need to read the basic concepts on the main site, and probably His Needs/Her Needs and LoveBusters. Those books are usually available in your public library.

Based on what little you've said, it's possible your wife is already in an affair. If she isn't, she's obviously heading that way. HOWEVER, there is hope. Read the basic concepts, read the articles and the letters and responses from Dr. Harley. That is your best starting point.

And fill in some blanks. How old are you? HOw long have you been married? Do you have children? What's your history?

i love my hubby, but not in love

i'm confused, go out with friends (want him to go out with his friends)

reject affection...because it always leads to sex.

not using dating websites, but have contemplated opening pandoras box...actually have....

hubby is always grumpy, miserable attitude, always watching tv and wanting me to wait on him hand and foot.

He was working out of town, and i kind of got used to him not bein around, got used to a little freedom (since never having any since we got together in H.S.) can't wait for him to go to night shift...

I shouldn't feel this way but i do... It's not fair to either of us for me to feel this way... what to do??

Confused,

That makes two of us.. Are you jdlnttl's W?

AGG

What are the problems in the marriage?

nope if i understood ur initials correctly i'm not that person's wife.

18 years with the same person.

never really dated anyone before him.. he was my first

Emotional needs not being met and haven't been met for several years now. I had a complete hysterectomy in 2005 and since then I am more outgoing, a new person, more confident and feel better about myself. He is very negative and just wants to sit on the couch and be a couch potato and I just don't want to just sit on the couch. Not that i want to go out all the time, but doing things with the kids and being happy.

I just feel as though we have grown apart, and he says no matter what he does to change it doesn't make me happy and he can't do anything right. He does try and do more with the kids and with me, but i almost feel as though it's like 16 years too late...

He only pays me attention when he wants sex (in my opinion) because other than that, i get no attention or affection at all.. I miss the spark the romance, you know like when you first date and it's just ahhhh you know...

I am a LEO i am very passionate, affectionate and love to be shown attention and affection and I don't get it enough.

Not that I think the grass is greener on the other side, i just don't want to be unhappy for the rest of my life and think we need to figure out what will make us happy. I don't think staying together for the kids sake is a reason to stay married.

We have tried MC and it seemed to work for a bit, but then he started working out of town and I kinda liked not having to answer to my every whereabout all the time and got a little taste of some freedom and it's nice, because i never got to do alot of things getting married so young.. I don't know maybe cause i didn't sew my wild oats as a child i am having amid life crisis now... ???