Over the past 4 weeks my wife and I have become closer, I have even felt happiness helping her more and taking some of the burden off. In this 4 weeks, the fact that I had spent time with someone else really a heavy weight on my chest and I felt that if I was going to change complete honesty needed to be one of the changes. Anyway, I told her about this person last night. Right now she is in the "I don't think I can do this" state of mind and I can't blame her. She was broadsided with news that is devistating. Telling her about this was one of the hardest things I have done in my life . I am hoping that there will be some hope, we have a meeting with a MC on Tuesday and we are going out tonight so she can tell me how she feels. I just feel that if she leaves I won't be able to handle it.

So I'm wondering what I should do or say to bring up Plan A Plan B so that she and I can work on this together. I have already ended the time with OW a couple months ago ago and the OW found out that I am really trying to make my marriage work and is very upset. I have cut off all contact with her though.

Now I need to figure out how to save my marriage but feel that it's almost a helpless cause.

any thoughts are soooo appreciated

How does OW know that you are trying to make your marriage work? How do you know she is upset?

If OW know what you are doing and you know how she is feeling this is not No Contact!

I don't think you should even mention Plans that your wife needs to learn and work on at this point. First, the two of you need to figure out how your marriage got to this point and what you are going to do to change to make sure it does not happen again.

I think you are being very selfish and unrealistic to think that your wife will be able to do much of anything right now. You may have lifted a heavy weight off your chest. But your wife's world just came crashing down around her. Give her some time and be patient. Focus on supporting her and helping her grieve the loss of her marriage as she knew it. You can recover your marriage but it will be a different marriage than you had before.

I read your other thread, are you posting a new thread here hoping that the people who read it have not read your other thread and will give you more sympathy because they don't know how selfish you are? Everything you post is about YOU, "telling her about this was one of the hardest things I have done in my life" Get over yourself and start thinking about your wife and kids and how you can help them.