I have been separated with my wife for the past four months. This happened right after I lost my business and I am unemployed. We are currently live in two different state. she is the sole provider right now, since I don't have a job. I think that she maybe seeing someone already. I am not sure, she said that I have been neglecting her for a very long time. I am currently going to counselling and she's paying for the sesseions that doe that mean she still loves me and still want me to change and make our marriage work. But when I tried and talk to her, she always seems irritated and shrude most of the time. I upset her very easily now, just the little wrong things would set her off. I have been sending her notes and flowers telling her how much I love her and I apologize for my past behavior. I still doesn't seem to help. I also contemplating divorce and start dating again, but I don't know if I can, I love her so much. I just wonder if I was to start dating another woman woudl that help me take my mind of her. when I keep my mind occurpied I dont seem to shed that much tears, but when I am alone and have no one to talk to and nothing to do that's when I feel the most depressed and I cried.

Your in a similiar situation then me. My WW currently has her own place to live also. You have to stay strong. I'm not an expert and I'm not all that strong or stable either but the last thing you should do is start dating to take your mind off her. You need to get straight and figure your marriage/divorce out first and foremost.

Why does she become upset when she talks to you? Is there a common factor? If you can't avoid setting her off then you will do nothing positive. Mine is a lot the same way. I've now relegated myself to not contacting her as much as possible and will do so even less in the future. This might not be a positive thing but at least it's not a negative.

First and foremost stay strong and work on the things you should.

Why did she leave if I may ask?

Thanks for the encouragement. I am continue to change for the better of me. I told her that I am changing and I just hope that she still love me enough and open enough to see the changes that I am going through. My first priority is to get a job and get back on my feet financially and be financially independent again. I think part of the reason is that I am currently unemploy with a Bachelor degree in business. The employment situation doesn't help my cause either

Just keep pluggin along and stay as strong as you can. I know it's hard because even I can't take my own advice and use it. What an oxymoron that is.

Why aren't you currently living with her? If you don't have a job, I don't understand the point of living in different states. And no, you shouldn't start dating someone, you are married. My advice to you would be to move back in with her, (she can't keep you out, you are married), work dillegently to find a job so you can help out financially, and slowly work on meeting her ENs without LBing, expecting nothing in return. Once you move back in, you'll know whether or not she is seeing someone, and you will be in a position to stop it.

I lost the business and move back to our home state, and she said she doesn't both of us unemploy and she said that she's looking for job on line here too. But I kind of no really believing it, I don't think she is looking as hard as she can. It seem that she's spending more time going out than looking.

One minute she want a vow renewal wedding and the next she doesn't know if there's a future for us together. WOW talk about a shot in the heart. This is got to be the worst feelings in the world. The uncertainty of your spouse leave or staying. I hope no one else would go through the same thing that I am going through right now