Does anyone know where can I find the information on fog?

which fog?? the WS fog or the BS fog???? What is it you want to know...it might be easier if you tell what you want to know rather than send you on a goose chase .....

not2fun

Does anyone know where can I find the information on fog?

ezb - You are kidding, right?

Fog about what? Marriage? Swinging? Self-gratification?


This site is dedicated to MARRIAGE building, not to entitlement to violate the basic premise of marriage: ONE man and ONE woman, exclusively, for life.

So just what "Fog" are you asking about or are you just attempting to "yank the chains" of everyone who believes in fidelity, and not infidelity, in marriage?

This is the time where I would normally get defensive but there's nothing to get defensive about. I have been, em doing and will conitnue to try to build my marriage to where it should be. If you want to jump on someone for infidelity then you need to address my WW.

I apologize for not knowing how to describe it and I don't know the difference between WS fog and BS fog. I'm at a point right now where I will not tollerate being lied to about what she is doing on the side. I myself have been faithful and will continue to do so.

So to answer your question: I guess it should be phrased How can I find out about WW creating fog? (the best I know how to describe it).

I wrote a piece about it in my link below...Inside the Wayward Mind...I talk about fog there...Hope it helps!

The Harley's haven't really written about "fog" per se, so there aren't really articles pertaining to it by them.

Thank you so much. Any insight will help me at this point in my frustration.

Know something FH?

I'm not getting sucked into this one again.

After 5 years of swinging, now ezb considers himself
" faithful ."

Where's the vomit bucket?

All Blessings,
Jerry

Shine that was something we did together and I'm not going to get into another pissing match.

I'm solely trying my best to work on rebuilding my marriage. Is there help for that here or not?

Thank you again Res.

Okay, ezb, then let's start with the very basic question about "lifestyle choices."

Do you believe in complete fidelity within a marriage, sex with ONLY your spouse and no one else, for the remainder of your life, even if sex became a physical impossibility?

Does your wife believe in complete fidelity within a marriage, sex with ONLY your spouse and no one else, for the remainder of her life, even if sex became a physical impossibility?

THAT is "clarity," any exception to that is "fog laden."

So starting there, what would be your answer?

There is help, but let me ask you this...Do you want to NOW have a monogamous relationship with your wife, with extraordinary precautions in place, to prevent anything extramarital from happening again?

I think that is the problem we all have. If you just want your wife back so you can resume the same lifestyle, which all of us here know will only lead to more problems, then most are not going to help you.

If you want to CHANGE your life, if you RECOGNIZE that the lifestyle you had is not conducive to a happy marital union, then we would like to help you. ANYONE can change...

We just need to know your intentions, please.

Very understandable Res. and thank you for being positive. The only intention I have at this time is rebuilding my marriage. There is nothing else on my mind.

As far as the lifestyle is concerned the only and my last comment on it will be that I'am the one not currently involved in it to any extent.

FH,

At this time I believe in fidelity for our situation. What the future holds I do not know and personally do not care. The only thing I have cared about is rebuilding my marriage.

As for her I cannot answer that other then to say she has sent out emails wanting no strings attached sex and I have no idea where she lives and if shes been truthful in what shes told me. (I can only assume she hasn't been because she has lied numerous times).

It amuses me to see the things written on Inside the Wayward Mind as I have heard nearly all of them!!! It's making me think of things differently and maybe see a little ray of hope that he is just temporarily insane and abducted by aliens....LOL>

I happen to like your tag line too. Been insane for awhile now.

When you do IT only/excusively together IT would be considered being "Faithful".

When you do IT together, but with other partners, IT would be considered being "Unfaithful".

YOU have a "Wayward" mindset (full of fog) that needs cleared up to be able to see what's ahead. YOUR M has no possible chance of recovery if you cannot accept the simplicity of being honest with yourself about YOUR own actions.


Yes. But only when you stop being so defensive and accept the consequences of your past actions. There are alot of BS's here who have been abused by your Wayward type of logic and thinking. So expect them to pick you apart, and if you can't stand the heat find a different kitchen.

You are sitting so high and mighty, exasperated with how you are trying to save your marriage, when in reality you have reaped what you have sown!

I'm sorry, but only through a complete surrender and complete transformation, admitting all your transgressions/wrongs and acknowledging you are also a Wayward, do I see your M having even a snowballs chance in hell!

Then again, those were the same odds given on me!
So yes miracles do happen.......but IMO you can only begin by falling on your face in front of your Creator and giving Him Truth and Humility. And then speaking truth and humility here. Not the same *EDIT* you have been spreading so far.

This is the type of *edit* I'm refering to.

Either you are committed to a lifetime of Exclusive Romantic Love WITH ONLY your wife.... Forever.... or your NOT!

And what kind of statement is "you personally don't care what the future holds".

Just a bunch of FOG crap....

And why is that?

Do you understand yet how destructive this was to your marriage? You can paint it pretty any way you want, it's still an ugly fact that contributed to the demise of your marriage, whether you choose to believe that or not.

Honestly. Think about it. Don't respond here. Look in the mirror and ask yourself what the truth is, if you can.

There's a quote somewhere important about what happens to those who choose a reprobate mind... or something like that... but I don't think you're ready to hear that right now.

The first step in rebuilding your marriage is to admit that maybe, just maybe, the "lifestyle" opened doors you didn't mean to open.

THEN you might get somewhere. THEN you might be able to rebuild your marriage. But only THEN will you get what we're trying to tell you.

ezb,

If you want help UP out of the muck and mire you've been in, then start getting honest. You will not find many willing to participate in being pulled DOWN into your foggy/wayward logic!

PM and TST,

Don't waste your time and energy here. Ezb has no clue whatsoever a faithful and dedicated M is.

It's eveidenced by him stating that "for now" but don't know or care about the future. How ridiculous!

Save your energy *EDIT* !

All Blessings,
Jerry

At this time - What the future holds I do not know and personally do not care.

ezb - you started out asking what "fog" was. There it is, right in front of you, but you "do not care."

That is the problem ezb. You want fidelity as long as it suits you, but you want to keep the door open to infidelity should the "mood" strike you or your wife. Classic "cakeeating."

You want a relationship of some kind with someone who thinks "just like you?" You have one, it's what the two of you agreed to and what you built. But it's NOT a MARRIAGE. At best, it's a contractual agreement....and you know what they say about contracts..."not worth the paper they are written on" and "made to be broken."

Yours IS broken. It has since it signed with both of you holding "crossed fingers behind your backs" when you said "I do." What you both really meant was, "I do until I don't."

Commitment, ezb. Not in the vocabulary.
Fidelity, only when it's "convenient."
Future, no firm morals to stand on.
Reason, what's in it for me at this time and this time only?





Birds of a feather, ezb.

You CANNOT recover a marriage, because a marriage has never existed.

Cheaters (read it as chosen "lifestyle" if it makes you feel better) LIE. That's a truism.

No marriage built on LIES can survive.

What you want, what you wish for, is unattainable without a complete change in "belief systems" for both of you. If only YOU were to change your "belief system," (and it's not likely given your response to the question that pertained to you), then you COULD have a good marriage, but not with your current wife. You could only have one with someone who shared a belief in what Marriage IS 'all about.'

Until such time as there is evidence of REAL change in you, I am withdrawing from any attempts to help you "have your cake and eat it too." You answered my questions, and for that I thank you. You have made it clear that what is only of interest to you is, once again, what you WANT, when you want it. I have others to assist, and I will leave you to your chosen path.

I hope you come to the time when you really can choose....and can choose wisely. For now, you've "made your bed" and you've filled it with others and okayed it for your wife to do the same, as long as the euphamisim of "no strings attached" was there. Unfortunately, you don't understand that there are ALWAYS strings attached, even if you don't want to acknowledge them because it would "interfere" with you being able to do whatever you felt like doing.

It's amazing to see the old '60's rationalizations for "free sex" still alive and well. Some day you will hopefully grow up and really begin to learn. Self-absorbtion and moral relativism to enable you to do whatever you want to do, whenever you want to do it,...completely denying the reality of "consequences for all of our actions."

Good luck.