I haven't been here much lately - he hasn't moved out yet, who knows what he will do - but I do have a question that's really got me wondering.

What on earth what make a WH cry real tears and sit alone in the dark, not saying a word, at the end of the movie *Cars*???

It's a very good movie and I highly recommend it, but it did not make me cry and I sometimes do cry at movies -

???

Janeen/Mulan

i didn't see the movie.

good to see you though.

how are you holding up?

mlhb

Wow... I've got no idea... and even though I'm a guy, I sometimes tear up at movies, too.

The plot of the movie "Cars" involves a self-centered person realizing that he needs to let other people into his life. Do you think your H might have recognized himself as the self-centered Lightning McQueen? That's the only thing I can think of...

It also shows "The King" and his wife at the end as she sticks by his side after his big wreck.

Or it could have triggered a memory of watching it as a family.

I cried a bunch over one of Charlize Theron's movie's about her work in a factory. There was a man who stood by his wife while she fought cancer and he took good care of her.

I could see myself doing that for my W at the time, who was a WW.

I cried because I loved her that much and saw myself at her side the way the character stood by his W and saw a future where I'd be willing to do something like that for my W.

I can't speak for your H, but in our case the Rascal Flatts version of "Life is a Highway" has become our recovery song. Check out the lyrics:

Life's like a road that you travel on
When there's one day here and the next day gone
Somethimes you bend and sometimes you stand
Sometimes you turn your head to the wind
There's a world outside ev'ry darkened door
Where blues won't haunt you anymore
Where brave are free and lovers soar
Come ride with me to the distant shore
We won't hesitate
Break down the garden's gate
There's not much time left today

Life is a highway
I wanna ride it all night long
If you're going my way
I wanna drive it all night long

Through all these cities and all these towns
It's in my blood and it's all around
I love you now like I loved you then
This is the road and these are the hands
From Mozambique to those Memphis nights
The khyber Pass to Vancouver's lights

Knock me down get back up again
You're in my blood
I'm not a lonely man
There's no load I can't hold
Road so rough this I know
I'll be there when the light comes in
Just tell 'em we're survivors

Gimme gimme gimme gimme yeah
If you're going my way
I wanna drive it all night long
There was a distance between you and I
A misunderstanding once
But now we look in the eye

There ain't no load that I can't hold
Road so rough this I know
I'll be there when the light comes in
Just tell 'em we're survivors

Life is a highway
I wanna ride it all night long
If you're going my way
I wanna drive it all night long


Possibly your H relates to the lyrics like my FWW and I do. We especially like this verse:

There was a distance between you and I
A misunderstanding once
But now we look in the eye

There ain't no load that I can't hold
Road so rough this I know
I'll be there when the light comes in
Just tell 'em we're survivors

I have no idea why a man would cry at that movie, but in all fairness, I could give two [censored] what's up with your WH. PWC pulled that same crap on me with the movie "Click", professing that seeing that movie was part of the impetus that pushed him to ask if he could come home. What an idiot I was for falling for that drivel. IT'S A MOVIE!!! Real life is much more complicated and difficult. WH was ill prepared for what he would be up against, in terms of recovery, and was unwilling to do what NEEDED to be done.

The movie evoked an EMOTIVE response. WOW! Big whoop! I cry at those SPCA commercials, for pity sake. That doens't mean I'm going to DO anything, or make drastic changes in my life. It just means I FELT something for a moment.

Sorry for the rant.

How are YOU doing, Mulan?

Can't say that I could remember anything about the storyline or plot because the one and only time I watched the movie 'Cars' was the day my world was destroyed and my life fell apart...

...December 3, 2006...my STBXWW came home after abandoning the kids and I for 10 days so that she could spend that time with one of her Ex'es. Then on the morning of 12/3/06, she told me of a PA she had had in order to make me angry enough to divorce her.

I will never forget the feeling of almost fainting when STBX told me of her revelation...nor will I forget the total helpless feeling of silently sobbing while sitting next to my kids as they laughed and watched the movie 'Cars'...they were just so happy that their mother was back...little did they know of what was really going on that day!

LoBoy

My ex cries at everything now...even shows like the Simpson's can make her cry.
In the past, her tears were nothing more than a manipulation tactic...now they are tears of regret.

I am with whomever said...it doesn't matter why he was crying...only what he is doing.

MEDC

LostBoy, so sorry for the bad memory.

Here is how the movie struck me:

WH turned into Lightning McQueen and took off down the Interstate in search of fame, money and empty cups.

Our family became Radiator Springs, alone and forgotten and bypassed and ignored, made up of only a few lost souls who were trying desperately to hold it together but instead could only watch it crumble and fade more every day.

In 28 years, I've never seen him cry at a movie. Ever.

Since I have to watch that movie 5 times a week thanks to my two boys, I can tell you that Mrs. King's immediate, gut reaction to King's flip at the end of the final race shows exactly what kind of a person she is. (Yes, I know it's a movie, just be quiet.) Only 3 months after D-Day, I have no idea if FWW would have that kind of reaction to me. Sure, she'd be sad, but would her world fall apart? Would she be losing a piece of her if the worst happened to me? She is in my blood and I could not imagine living without her. I'd stay by her side no matter what happened to her. I guess in post-A, that kind of devotion from a wife is what I dream of someday. I can't say I have that now.

It's also a remarkable ending when Lightning gives up his hopes and dreams all to help another. The "look" on Lightning's face when he sees King's wreck on the jumbotron is a look of fear and anger as he realizes how one selfish person (Chick) can completely ruin the life of another. It's a moment of honor and personal courage that most men do not have anymore. Maybe a WH would trigger because he sees what he could not do. Every WS has a chance to show that honor and respect when in the clutches of OS for the first time, but they choose the road of personal satisfaction instead.

I have to admit that I've cried at some movies, Cars not being one of them. If anybody has seen Robin Williams in "What Dreams May Come," you might understand. I had to actually stop the movie halfway through. I tried to be a man in front of my wife as we were watching it, but I couldn't hold it back anymore. It made me feel like a real wimp.

He was out of popcorn?

"Cars" as a metaphor for WS remorse is a bit of a stretch. IMO. A trigger for WS is a reach. Don’t read anything hopeful into it.

with prayers,

Sorry for the T/J but ...

Damn you Robin Williams I still can't watch this with dry eyes.

DD Day

I couldn't watch that without tearing up BEFORE d-day...let alone now. Great movie.

Hey Mulan,

It's nice to see you during daylight hours.

I wouldn't read anything into what occured.

May have triggered childhood memories for all anyone knows.

SMB & I are still praying for ya!

Mulan posted this, Queenie....