Hello Friends
I posted in General a while ago, I had found out that my wife of five months had been having an affair, up till Feb this year in our house while I was at work.

I have moved out, we have filed for divorce, she had been trying to make it work, but she still denied the affair, so I had no closure, I was willing to accept her sleeping with men in my house...me being made a fool of..I was ready to accept that.

Well she made a copy of key to my apt. and when I would not let her in she let herself in, she would not leave unless I agreed to go out with her, funny thing is that I wanted to go with her.

When we finished we argued like we always do, reason being was that she took the key after I laid it down, and denied taking it.
Suffice it to say tempers flared and lots of hurtful things where said.

We had already signed the D papers and have a court date.
Why then am I feeling such shame and loss over this woman who cheated on me without guilt and was/is unrepenetant through it all, she emailed me to tell me that she will not be contacting me anymore and that its over...and the divorce will go on and she is moving on.... all of a sudden I feel this immense grief come over me...

I dont trust her because she lies so much, yet I got attached to that, attached to this way we have been living since sept..
She calls around to my parents and hers, making it look like its my fault, that I am imagining this and that she is the victim.

I needed to post this tonight, and appreciate the feedback and suggestions....I realize that this is the best course of action for us, my second marriage that saddens me but I dont want to fall into a depression over this...

But when she emailed me to tell me that its finaly over I felt like the rug was pulled from under me....

I'm hanging in though
Thank You so very, very much ...................

Count your blessings that you didn't discover her true character after 10 years of marriage and a couple of kids.

I know it is very hurtful as it is, because your hopes and dreams are crashing down around you.

Hope you will stick with us, go through the grief and keeping studying how to have a good marriage.

Divorce will be completed on June 23rd
When I was moving out I gave my wife a spare key and I had one of hers, I dont know why I did that, I just did it...
I asked for the key back, she gave it to me, but she made a copy of it, subsequently she let herself into my apt while I was sleeping last saturday...

And before I could get the lock changed she came in while I was at work and went through my home phones call list.
She harrassed me at work and my friends and she said that she wants alimony and she is going to call my ex and try to get her to up my child support.

I spoke with her first husband and without mentioning what I was going through he mentioned to me the exact same things.
I have audio of her with another man on several occasions.
She is a peice of work, I made a terrible mistake with her, terrible.

I am going to see about retaining a lawyer, we already filed for divorce and its a no fault divorce that we filed for.
Can she pull that decree and refile for spousal support ??
I know a law question..

Right now I feel like a captive, even though I am moved out from her, I want this nightmare to stop, thank god we didnt have nay children, she had an abortion and a miscarriage....dont know if they where even mine to tell the truth, I have to go dark with her, I am going to file for a restraining order on her.
I went to the police station and told the officer on duty what happened he said that they are going to arrest her as she violated my home with an unlawful entry, I chose not to do that with her daughter graduating this Friday.
OMG, what crazy thing this is....

It's highly doubtful that she'll get alimony/spousal support after only 5 months of marriage, but make sure you get a good laywer on this.

You have changed the locks, haven't you? If not, do that right away.

Allow yourself to grieve. You're grieving for the marriage you thought you'd have, for the woman you thought you were marrying. It's okay, and eventually, it gets better.