Okay guys, as many of you know, I just gave W her PBL yesterday when she came and picked up her stuff.

I need feedback from anyone currently in Plan B, as well as anyone who's M survived AFTER Plan B.

Obviously, I am attempting to save both my marriage AND my sanity/emotions by doing Plan B. I could no longer stand the yo-yo of emotions I felt during Plan A, so going dark is my only hope.

Since I'm only <24 hours into this, I'm of course second guessing "the plan" and desperately wanting to speak to my W. I can endure, but I need to see that this has worked or is working for someone else.

Yesterday was very conflicting. In one breath W spouts hope and uncertainty about what she's doing. In another she is spewing venom and being assertive. I asked her to "be sure" about this, and she responded with, "You can never be SURE of anything." She says she needs to "find herself."

Personally, I think she was trying to leave herself just enough rope here to reel herself back in if things aren't the way she has them pictured in her current fantasy FOG.

I KNOW that she didn't even stay in the place she rented last night, choosing to stay with a friend instead. This FRIEND (the ONLY one she has right now) is married herself and has 3 kids. She will eventually have to stay ALONE in her new home...the soooner the better. She has never stayed in our home alone even with the children for one night.

BTW, YES, I did go by the new place on both Sat. and Sun. nights, looking for OM and seeking further proof (video) of the A. I did not find them together. In fact, I can account for everywhere my W went both nights. I didn't sleep at all on Sat., riding around instead, trailing her every move like a hound dog. Remeber, OM lives in a town 4 hours away, though his elderly parents live only 50 miles away.

While I'm not sure if I am disappointed or relieved not tohave caught them IN THE ACT, it does help me stick to Plan B (rather than Plan D)more enthusiastically without the visuals I was expecting.

Let me hear from you. We ALL need one another's support right now, and I'm sure those of us currently in Plan B would LOVE to hear some success stories!

PLan B for <24 hours, and she's already called. W just called home phone, I did not answer. Proceeds to text me, "Just wanted to tell the baby good morning, but again, U did not answer."

Me thinks this was a test to see if I REALLY meant the things I said in the PBL.

I can't begin to tell you how tempted I was to answer. But then, just as I reached for the receiver, I thought, "She knows what to do when she REALLY wants to talk, stick to your guns!"

I really want to hear from someone else doing Plan B, or even better, from someone who did Plan B and saved their M!

WW's will any excuse to get you to pick up the phone and break plan b. It's hard keep up the effort.

What would you of done if you found the OM's car at the WW's car at the new place?

Plan b say's not to have contact. Would it be worth it to break it? I don't because WW can keep using OM to get you to break NC with WW. Besides you can not keep watch 24/7. So you will never be able to prevent the WW and OM from contact with each other.

You could at best is to take a photo to gather evidence of her seeing the OM. In the end I think it better in the long run to not break plan b.

In my mind, Plan B started yeaterday. Not sure what I would've done had I "caught" them, that's whay I took a friend to watch over and try to control me.

I won't break Plan B from this point forward, but I STILL want to know that it has indeed WORKED for someone!

Hi AB3,

I'm glad to see that you have gone to Plan B. I fortunately never had to go that route but there are many on here that have been very successful. Remember though, Plan B is for you. It is not meant to bring WS back to the marriage although that is sometimes the result. It is to insulate you and your children from the destructive emotion and drama of your WW and to protect any loving feelings that you still have for her.


In order to be successful, you must withstand all of her attempts to break it. Do you have a intermediary? If not, get one and block her from texting you. Reading her texts keeps you emotionally connected and continues to drain your love bank. An intermediary must be willing to censor her texts/emails (whatever you decide on and only tell you if it requires a change in the already decided schedule or is a true emergency. They will filter out all hatred, anger and sarcasm.

Say