Here's a copy of my Plan B letter.
My Dearest Mrs. Amazin,
I remember our courtship and how we met. I remember talking on the phone for hours until you fell asleep. I remember our first date at the square in Ft. Worth and our first kiss. I remember Thanksgiving at your mother’s house. I remember all the paper hearts in our bedroom, in our house and on our cars. I remember how I proposed to you at the Italian Inn. I remember how I proposed to you again for the kids because they were chanting “Ask, Ask, Ask!” I remember our beautiful wedding and our honeymoon in Cancun. I remember a time when you were passionately in love with me and my heart longs for those days to come again.
On our wedding day I made a promise to you in front of God and our family to faithfully love and cherish you, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, and in good times or bad. I have kept that promise in the past and I plan on keeping that promise in the future.
I am writing this letter because I want to protect the love that I have for you and keep it from turning into hate. Your extramarital affairs have hurt me deeply and I do not want to see you, talk to you, or have any contact with you from now on.
I have made plenty of mistakes in this marriage and I own every single one of them. I gambled away a lot of money. I was selfish. I made independent decisions about our finances, our family and our life without talking to you or taking you into consideration. I neglected to meet your emotional needs. For all of these and many other mistakes that I have made, I am truly sorry.
I will always regard Step Daughter and Stepson as family. If Step Daughter wants to come over and visit she can call me directly or ask one of my kids and they can ask me. There should be no reason for you to have any contact with me. If there is something that absolutely must be communicated to me, you can do that through my brother. His number is xxx-xxx-xxxx.
I want you to know that there is a way home. There is a pathway to a new marriage. This path would require changes in both of us. If we stray from the path in one direction or the other, our chances for a new marriage are minimal. Together we can create a marriage in which other people of the opposite sex will never ever be an issue. They would have no place in our marriage. We can create a marriage based on honesty on many levels; financial honesty, emotional honesty, honesty about where we are and who we are with. We can have a marriage in which we give each other our undivided attention and our emotional needs are met. We can have a great marriage if we avoid being the cause of each others unhappiness, by making a small lifestyle change and getting some marital guidance. I can only be married to someone who values these principles and who would eagerly embrace this lifestyle.
I still have hope for us, our marriage and our family. Forgiveness is possible. Regaining the passionate love we once had for each other is possible. Recovery is possible. The answer to all my prayers would be for us to have a happy loving marriage and a blessed family. I am willing to avoid the mistakes I’ve made in the past and create a new life for both of us that will meet your needs.
I hope that someday we may have a new marriage. I want us to be able to meet each other’s emotional needs and to avoid doing anything to hurt each other. We can build a new lifestyle in which everything we do makes us both happy. Then there will never again be a reason for us to separate. I want to be your best friend, someone who is always there for you when you need me. And I want you as my best friend. I loved you the day we were married and I continue to love you right up to this day. I just cannot see you, talk to you, or help you until you end your extramarital affairs once and for all.
Love,
Amazin
I hope God touches her and softens her heart.
