Chronic twisted thong caught, belly ring hole brain seepage?

Sort of a wayward Ebola.

3 words that ought never be used in a single sentence together

thong
hole
seepage

Good lord

I am a 49 yo man who just coughed coke through my nose while putting a powerpoint project status together at work.

Keep it up and I may fall out my chair.

DD20 is fine. I just talked to her and she is much better. Plus she got her $300 government stimulus check today so she is now super fine.

Her Mom called this evening to check on her and asked, “Was you’re Dad angry that I did not come to the hospital?”

Hmmmm…someone feeling a little guilt maybe?

Come on all you schoolbuses out there; when did she ever care about my feelings these past 2-years?

DD did not know how to answer so said she thought I was fine with it. I told her if the unlikely occurrence would happen that she would ask again, the truthful answer is that I was not surprised at all that she did not come.

I also shot the following email to XMIL (Grandzilla):

“XMIL,

Although I know that you and XFIL would have done the same a million times over if needed, I wanted to thank you for meeting DD20 at the hospital on Sunday. I know that the only thing worse then the pain she had, was the fear and uncertainty of being at an ER for the first time in her life. As expected she could count on you.

I did all I could to be there earlier, but my car had stranded me across town the night before and when I first got DD20’s call I was in the middle of getting it home.

Again, thank you, and I know how much DD20 appreciated it.

Please give my best regards to XFIL.

chrisner’s first name, last name.”


I will be eternally grateful that I was a betrayed spouse and not a wayward.

Amen Chrisner. I would rather be the BS rather than the WS anyday. What a hell they must live in....

Seems I missed a WHOLE lotta stuff today.

I'm so glad that I do not have a belly button ring; nuff said on that one. I, too, and one of them thar visual thunkers, and it HUUUUUURTS, it HUUUUURTS.

I also have to say how beautifully you handled GrandZ and following up with an email of thanks. Well done, well done.

BC's got to be feeling a disturbance in the force today.

Gosh, could seeing you with someone else have been a bit of a wakeup call?

Hmmm?

I told my mom your story last night and she was pumping her fist with happiness when I told her about your hospital encounter.

She is a BS too, so she understands.

I'm glad to hear DD20 is better. She has a good head on her shoulders. I'm planning on quoting her when I get deposed again. She had some very insightful thoughts a few months ago about the seasons.

Stay strong.

My cell phone just had a single, abbreviated ring at my desk and then fell silent.

Wayzilla.

She’s out in the perimeter wire. Time to pull down the shades tighter in the Jimmy Hoffa Plan B from the Far Side of Pluto.

Who knew that seeing you with someone else would shake her so much?

Do you think this has been brought on by seeing you with someone else?

No message from Wayzilla?

I still feel that deep down inside waywards see the betrayed as backups if their plans should fail with new OM/OW. Seeing the BS genuinely moving on and doing so in a healthy way may be a bit shocking.

We are the ones who had to rise again from the ashes of betrayal, hurt, crying, and devastation. But like the fires of personal recovery, knowledge of MB and acceptance of it's principles, and the time to heal let the BS rise like a phoenix from the ashes and be a real catch to a potentially new partner.

The wayward? We all know how they normally end up.

Chrisner, you are an inspiration to us on this board and a laugh and a hoot as well. You have made me laugh out loud when I've read your thread. Sorry I borrowed the name Gollum for my purposes. You'd understand if you saw a picture.

Stay strong. Stay dark.

Too friggin' funny. She's fighting it. That incredible NEED to reach out to the other. She was ALMOST there....

She'll do it again. She can't help it. You disturbed her view of "reality".

And like a cat....her curiosity will not be kept at bay for long.

Or maybe she just needs help untwisting her panties from the belly button ring. That's gotta hurt.

Keep us updated.....

Fox

No message. Just a single ping.

Must be the sound of a wayward bouncing off the force field surrounding a BS.

She better grab her ACME jet pack....this could take some work.

Fox

That reminds me of something...

There could be something else at work here besides what she feels about you and darkness.

She may actually be second guessing her decisions because of her daughter going to the ER.

So she's now seen her daughter in a very vulnerable position and feels almost like an outsider in what is a personal family situation.

Your daughter is reaching out to you, not her in this crisis and you now come as a pair.

There is a little part of her, however unreasonable, that feels threatened by the relationship between DD20 and DSG.

So now the reality hits. "Gosh, I've disintegrated my family. DD20 will never accept Gollum. She's happy with Chrisner and DSG. She needs me right now and we're not there as a family. The person who did this to us was me. Nevermind. That hurts to much to think about. I can't accept that reality. But then again...."

And so the confusion for her continues.

This may be more about her feelings as a mom than about you.

I dunno about this, Papa. Apparently, DD20 called BOTH of her parents, and only one showed. Just sounds like a bunch of crap to me. WZ chose not to go to her daughter, for whatever reasons. I wouldn't look too deeply into the WHY's. You can speculate til the sun comes up, and probably still not hit on the real reason.

Chrisner's got his plan. DD20 has a different relationship with WZ alltogether, and may need a different approach. It's not easy to lose a mother, even if it's only temporary. It's also not easy approaching your own mother about the damage she is doing to your relationship when all WZ will do is attempt to justify her actions. Poor mothering, to say the least.

You make some good points. And I agree with you about her feeling like an outsider.

Feelings as a mom, for me, are also tied up in my feelings as a wife (mother of HIS children) and feelings of belonging to a FAMILY.

KWIM?

For me, it isn' separated. - or shouldn't be if at all possible.

Because she CHOSE this path and it wasn't forced upon her....I think she is struggling on MANY levels.

Her DD is 20 - she doesn't NEED chrisner to fix her relationship. But she may WANT him to be a part of it. And to help ease her guilt, even after all this time.

Because everybody wants their cake and to eat it, too.

Fox

Here’s how the phone record on Sunday goes:

DD20 calls me. I miss the call but she leaves a message.
DD20 calls Wayzilla. Wayzilla takes the call.
Grandzilla calls DD20. So obviously Wayzilla called Grandzilla.
I get my message and call DD20.

Wayzilla finally calls DD20 in the evening and has been informed about DGS from Grandzilla.

Wayzilla must have thought she could get Grandzilla to stand in for her so she did not have to interrupt her knotted/snagged thong lap dance for Gollum down in Mordor Springs. Mmmmmmmm...the cake is sooooo good!

Thus the stupid question Sunday night, “Why did you call your Dad?” It was the perfect plan unless anyone with a brain that was not seeping out their belly button thought about it.

DD ruined everything by her inconceivable decision in a wayward mind to call me and it made her plan go totally wrong and gasp…...reflected poorly on her as a mother. Darn that DD20!

And I agree her current state is not about the relationship between DGS and me, but about the fear of the relationship between DGS and DD20.

I have to agree with this, as you and Papa both stated.

WZ SHOULD be fearful. She's throwing her relationship with her own daughter away. At this point, a cuddly puppy could do a better job at parenting, and comforting DD. Heck, a puppy would be at her beck and call, whereas WZ just can't seem to fit her in between her piercings.

DD20 is wounded and rightly so. It took YEARS for me to mend the relationship with my father and that didn't really happen till he got divorced from OW.

We'd probably still have tension between us if it wasn't for the D.

Yes, that relationship between a child and the other parent's significant other is scary and threatening at first. But the realization comes that the kids still love you regardless BUT that's only if you have a good relationship with them with OP in the picture.

Wayzilla lacks that right now and won't have it acting as she is doing so.