I'm new to this whole forum thing and not sure where to begin. Maybe a brief history: I was married young and divorced 21 years later. I have two children. The man I have been dating for the past 18 months, was married for less than a year and does not have children. We have been talking about getting married, however, the past 6 months we have encountered many ups and downs in the relationship. One of the issues we have encountered is different views and needs. For example, I have joint custody and my ex and I determined it was best for our children to remain in the same school district until they both graduate. I will be living in that district for another 7 years. The man I'm dating also has a house about 25 miles from me. He works for a company that he uses a company vehicle. The owner of his company requires that he must stay within a certain distance from the business. So, he can't move to me and I can't move to him. His resolution is to have us each keep both homes. That way when we are married he can keep his job, stay at my place when he doesn't work late. He would drive in his personal vehicle from my place to his place each morning to pick up his commercial vehicle, then go to work. When he gets home, he would go to his house, to drop off the vehicle, and drive to my house. This would occur each day unless he works later, which happens several times each week. His hours vary dependent on the customer his boss sends him too. I feel that isn't a marriage. To keep up two homes for the next 7 years have a husband who comes to my home 4-5 days out of 7, I think leaves room for problems. I recently asked to take a break from the relationship to clear my head. I really need some good healthy advice here. Can this work or is this a problem waiting to happen?

It can work if both people are committed to each other and they are emotionally healthy and grounded people. Otherwise, yes, I think you are right that there is potential for trouble.

My boss and his wife have spent 2 years living in different states because of his job and her custody agreement w/ her ex-husband. They see each other about once a month. They have been working towards living together (my boss is taking a new job that is in her state soon), but she had to be patient and wait for him to find something comparable near her.

I do want to emphasize that they are both very down-to-earth types. Both are very ethical and trustworthy. If either of them were jealous types or tended toward dramatics, I don't think it would have worked.