Just wondering if this has ever happened. It doesn't seem entirely unlikely as most people find their way here by searching the internet.

I am just curious. Seems like it could be a real trainwreck, and possibly an inadvertant breaking of NC in a big way.

Imagine posting support and advice to someone on here only to discover that it's your OP or worse your spouses OP...

Thought I'd ask...

TTH

I'm glad you asked this question because I have often wondered the same thing.

It will be interesting to see if it has happened here.

I use to post on a debate board and at one point an OW and BS did end up there together. It got very ugly. I do believe they were both banned for TOS violations.

At one point on the debate board I did get nervous becauseI thought my FOM's W started posting. There were enough similarities in our stories that at first I couldn't tell if it was her or not. It totally freaked me out and I stepped way back until I could be sure it wasn't her. In the end it wasn't, thankfully, but I did decide if it was her I would quietly walk away, let her safely post there and hoped she never figured I had been there, too.

LC

I know of an instance.

Once most of us figured out who the person really was, she was run off.

It won't ever happen to me. WstbxH and OW have no respect for marriage and no interest in saving either one of theirs. I already know OWH well enouh - he knows I post here and I know he's not into computers so he likely never will (probably reads once in a while). The only way WstbxH and/or OW will ever do any type of search that might stumble across this site will be after they get married and one of them cheats on the other. OWH and I think she will cheat first as she's already a confirmed serial cheater but it could happen the other way around. I suppose it could happen sooner than I expect - I know they are trying to get married already (darn divorce papers taking too long and poor, poor OW can't get OWH to agree to surrender all custody and visitation of DD so she can get DD's name changed to WstbxH). My guess is the wedding will occur the same day as the last of their divorces.

Talk about a big nightmare......{{{shudder}}}

I would die.....seriously....I would not be able to handle it.....

And I have worried about this from time to time. I referred her H to this place, WS knew about it shortly after C-day, and who knows if he told her about this place......

not2fun

I've seen it happen twice on another infidelity forum that I post on.

Both times, as soon as the posters realized that it was the "other side"...both sets of threads ended, and neither appeared to return to the forum.

Sometimes the internet isn't nearly as big as we imagine it to be.

Was she looking for trouble or help?

People being "run off" this board is something that really bugs the heck out of me about this place and the whole reason my DH stopped posting. I have seen it several times and I just simply do not understand the whole concept.

Who has the right to choose who gets to post and who doesn't? IMO, it should be up to admin and the mods. I am a mod of a board I belong to and we don't allow posters to be "picked on" until they leave or allow people to be "run off".

LC

OM is too arrogant and stupid to read here.

There was an instance of the OW coming here and staying here - she was repentant and remorseful, focused on rebuilding her marriage. But the betrayed spouse basically was forced to leave because OW wouldn't - and No contact means no contact for wayward OR betrayed.

Trouble.

She was a real nightmare for the BS that she was stalking.

That would have been gorunds for a good whoopin in a man's world.

In some women's, too, P!

The OW did it to take away the BW's safe place.

She got her walking papers quickly after that.

Hmmm, that had to be a tough spot to be in for both of them. If the FOW was working on her marriage and such that doesn't give her less of a right to post here than a BS, does it?

LC

hmmm....to me it would depend on who got here first????

yes, a nightmare sitch......{{{{{shudder}}}}}

OW in my case came here to find me. She didn't find me but she got a royal whooping from the posters here. She did everything she could to get me to kick my FWH out, including cyberstalking me.

You were who I was talking about Faithy.

(((FAITHY)))

Faithful Follower,

How did she even know you were here? Did she know you posted here or was she hoping to run across you?

How did you get her to leave you alone?

As for posting at the same place as FOM's W I think I would run for the hills. I'm fairly certain I would not want to read what she would have to say about me. I also think it would be very wierd to read FOM's version of our A.

If they somehow stumbled across this site now and started posting I would quietly disappear. I also would refrain from reading anything they had to say.

My FOM told so many lies to our coworkers before he left our employer that I can't even imagine what his version of the truth is. I would not read anything he would have to say because I know I would have a hard time not wanting to set the record straight if he continued the lies.

I'm just very thankful this is a hypothetical situation at this point.

LC

Here's a scary thought - what if the OP actually IS here and you don't know it? Considering their lies, would you be able to recognize the OP in your own situation?

IMO, the person would have to not only lie about the events of the A, but also lie about family dynamics and such in order not to be recognized. I suppose they could come here and alter dates and such, but as with any lie, eventually they all catch up to the person telling them.

Truth is usually consistant and lies well, we all know where they go.

LC

I am not going to say WHO or WHERE, for obvious reasons, but we have a situation on this board where an OW [active affair] is posting advice to the BS. As you can imagine, the advice is not MB, but more along the lines of "cut your losses," "he has made up his mind, move on..."

There are some very mean, evil people in this world.