deleted post

Great reply.

Zonie65

Your WW was involved as well as the OM. Shouldn't WW get 50% of your anger?

You made the choice to forgive your WW. There is no place for you to be both angry and to recover with your WW. Even if you had chosen to not recover with your WW. Being angry with her would never undo her PA.

Even if you wanted to divorce your WW, being angry and dwelling on what happened would not help you heal.

Now what to do with the other 50% of your anger. There's not much that you can do. You do not want to wind up in court.

You can chose to ignore the OM. He had your WW for a while but in the end he lost her to the better man, you.

I liked school bus idea of essentially giving the OM the freeze.

No doubt, Road.

Actually Mrs Z at first had at least 90% of my anger, and certainly owns more than 50% of the responsibility for what she did. But all of that isn't really relevant anymore. We've chosen to heal and Recover together.

I honestly wish I had the emotional fortitude to say that I'm the "better man" and ignore the POS. What I am saying though, is that I'd better come up with a plan now rather than rely on my instinct in the moment I encounter the POS. I'd love nothing more than to take out my caveman club and use it on him. But we've evolved right? My point is that despite knowing right from wrong, and everything I should do, my caveman wants to come out and get retribution. I don't think any discourse on the pros and cons of that would really change the basic emotion.

Mrs Z has a really good start on an excellent NC plan. But just being in proximity of POS and their friends made me realize that I might need one too. It's a dynamic that I hadn't thought of until Mrs Z posted her concerns about the subject.

I think this thread has been better at providing a needed vent rather than making strategies.

You have already known for a long time that jail and lawsuits greatly restrict what you can do.

The old "if I had only caught them in the act, then I could of used the temporary insanity or thought he was attacking my wife defense".

But if it did happened that you caught them in the act. There is no guarantee of how you would of reacted. Would you of used the "opportunity" for revenge? You can only guess.

I have gotten screwed over career wise. Sometimes it was my fault sometimes it was what someone did to me.

I regret what I had done.

I wish what was done to me would be done to them. It seems that they will never done to them what they have done to me.

All I can do is try to move forward career wise.

Zone, you can't count on karma. You can only move forward.