I do understand that, of course.
you say there are alot of things I could be doing. What do you suggest.
thank you for helping me with this!
I would suggest staying in Plan A for only about 2-3 more weeks and then going into a DARK Plan B. I would focus on being as attractive as possible over the next few weeks. I would stop the lovebusters, clean up the house, put on some make up and be as inviting as possible. Remember, every time you love bust him, you make the OW look better.
In this 2-3 weeks, put a strict visitation schedule into place, ie: every Saturday and Wednesday or whatever you think best. WITH THE STIPULATION that they never be exposed to his affair partner.
In 2-3 weeks go dark as night in Plan B. In your letter, state that you expect the bills will be paid as usual and attach a calendar for visitation PICKS UPS. Designate an intermediary.
Once you in Plan B for a few days, then start exposing the affair. With you out of the picture, the OW and your H will only have each other to lovebust. They will not have you around to blame so this will cause huge conflict in the affair.
I would expose in the same day if possible to the following:
1. WS's employer via registered letter, addressed to director of HR, ccing a key VP and both the OW and your H's bosses [we have a letter you can use]
2. the OW's parents - find out who they are even if you have to hire a PI. We have one we use around here named frank music. he is fairly cheap and is very good:
http://www.frankmusicinvestigations.net/ call the office and ask personally for Frank
3. call up your H's parents and tell them all the facts and ASK FOR THEIR ADVICE. This tends to motivate them to help you
4. any other key friends, pastor, or family that would be beneficial
Before you do any of these exposures, I would sit those kids down and tell them the truth. This is their life and they have a right to know what their dad is doing to them.
THAT is what I would do if I were you. Do you have
Surviving an Affair by Dr Harley?
