After reading a lot of other people's stories, and knowing how mine is, it got me thinking again about something that has always bothered me. Do you think that maybe part of the reason you had maritial problems is because you were afraid of marital problems? Or maybe a part of you knew that it was going to happen?

As an example many many years ago, I tend to like songs, conversations etc regarding raising a child that wasn't your own. And I eventually ended up marrying a woman who already had a child and became a father figure to him. It really felt so natural as if it was supposed to happen.

But I've also always felt drawn to songs about divorce, songs like Doug Supernaw's "I Don't Call Him Daddy" or Toby Keith's "Who's That Man" have always hit me really hard, years before I was even close to being married.

I know that things we fear the most can become a reality, and then FOO can be a big factor, and maybe that's all I'm refering to. I wasn just wondering if anyone else had similar experiences.

Foresight? Oh, I wish! I was completely blindsided by my marriage, and I shouldn't have been. In my case, I think it was niavety and willful blindness to red flags.

I had no foresight whatsoever. I was totally blindsided until my husband received a text message at 3:30 in the morning that I happened to intercept. Full discovery was 4 days later when I received the phone bill and looked at it carefully. I had trusted him totally - and following Dr. Harley's advice will never do so again.