I have posted previously with my story and recently found out some more info and would GREATLY appreciate thoughts on it ... Please read previous posts for background story (summary - been with her for 3 years, married just recently 7 months ago, no children, she is everything to me and I love her dearly):

I have recently received some more information. She doesn't know if she 'lives-to-work' or 'works-to-live'. She is placing a high priority on her career and feel so much disappointment that it sounds like she is putting our marriage second.

In other words, if she was single she could feel free to move anywhere she wanted with no questions. Whereas this isn't so in marriage, she feels constricted. A single person can go out with friends and drink and sleep over friend's homes as much as they want, this is only true to a more limited level when married, so she feels constricted.

She also stated that she doesn't know when she is going to want kids and have that stability of family. Her life as a single person was one of a nomad. I specifically had this conversation of my desire for stability prior to marriage, and we both said we like it here (our current home). Of course her work situation and related stress has apparently changed her whole outlook.

I feel terrified, disapointed, and angered by these revelations. But mostly confused, because she is 29 and loves children and loves family. She said she thinks she may be ready to have kid(s) in 3 years or so, which I actually completely agree with (as I'd like to have some time to enjoy a childless marriage and the freedom it allows). What is the problem ? She cares for me, loves me, smiles and laughs with me, and we still have a good time with eachother, as always. I guess I just don't know whether or not to deal with these panic of mine (which I seriously cannot imagine without some drugs) and play it out, or have more stress-ridden conversations with her (no matter how calm, these conversations are obviously still stressful).

To make things more complicated, we even booked our flights for our vacation just yesterday to Wine Country, Napa Valley California.