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Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 4
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 4 |
My husband cheated 3 years ago while I was pregnant with my 3 year old daughter. I was scared and afraid to be alone, so I stayed with him and he swore he would never do it again. He had an online account with AdultFriendFinders and was emailing to meet several people. We went through marriage counseling for almost a year and it helped a lot.
Two years later, things were going great, I got pregnant again (this time with twins), then while I was pregnant I caught him sending emails to a girl he met while he was away on a trip. I believe that he didn't do anything physical, but he did have an emotional connection with her and was lying and keeping it from me. I decided to stay with him again, but it was once again partly because I was afraid to be alone. This time he acted angry - not sorry which I didn't understand - we never really resolved it.
Now a year later, we have 3 kids, I'm feeling more confident then ever and I'm now feeling like I just can't forgive him for what he did. I'm feeling lately like I don't want to be in a relationship with him anymore because I always feel as though I'm just waiting for him to do something again. I feel like it is inevitable that he's going to cheat again...it's just a matter of time. I feel like my feelings for him have changed...like I just don't like him anymore.
However, I've been with him this long, can I really decide that I want a divorce NOW? I feel really guilty about feeling this way. Am I crazy? This is so hard.
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 38
Member
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Member
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 38 |
post this in genral questions youll get more responses but i dont think your crazy id get rid of him he obviously doesnt care.
Me 32 Her 31 Kids 11,7,6
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 11,245
Member
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Member
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 11,245 |
What actions have you two taken to ensure it won't happen again? Did you read the material here about transparency and such?
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 480
Member
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Member
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 480 |
Janespire, you didn't resolve the previous issues. Try to get him to do the EN's questionaires. Try to get him to counsel with the Harley's. Three little kids, both of you owe them the chance to grow up in an intact family. The best gift you can give them is to love each other, and to show them what a marriage is, if you don't, they, in turn will have difficult relationships when they are grown. Both of you owe it to the kids to at least try some serious counseling to give thenm a good chance at life in general. My FWH came from a divorced home from an early age, therefore didn't see anything but the adultery and disrespect that his dad gave his mom. No one taught him how to be a good husband, or a good father, for that matter. Children live what they learn. Don't teach them to throw the towel in. best wishes GF
Marriages don't fail, people do.
(And I don't recall who said it)
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