Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
#2107489 08/10/08 11:41 AM
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1
F
Junior Member
Junior Member
F Offline
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 1
Me and my husband got married last year. However, I decided to postponed our holy matrimony due to my doubt to this marriage. I found out that he has an online female friend that he never actually met due to the distance. He labels her as a good friend, unfortunately the girl labels him as a fiance. They know each other for more than 2 years and she knows too much about him. What bothers me the most is, that my husband cares too much about her. He believes every single word that she says eventhough reality says that it is not true, he always think that this girl does not deserve to be hurt in any way, not that I want to hurt her. My problem is, he keeps on seeing me as negative and compares me to this girl no matter how hard I tried to satisfy his needs. I understand that she sounds a lot better than me because she never got angry, she always speaks bible, very soft spoken, however, she only does that to my husband and not me. She called me once and threatened me that I will regret it if I don't leave my husband and that their marriage is already been prophesied. She also hacked all of my husband's email password up to the point that he could not figure it out until he called her and ask for it and many times she called my husband and encouraged him to leave me. My husband is aware of the situation but does not seems to be on my side.I tried to tell my husband what bothers me the most but he does not seems to even want to care about it and it always ended up in a big argument. After numerous of arguments and my growing stronger will of leaving him, he finally started to show some of his commitment of easing my pain, which is stop receiving her calls and replying her emails. However, I feel that his commitment to me is still unstable, especially after hearing the girl is coming to United States soon after getting her green card from the lottery. She keeps on contacting my husband and insisting on only coming to the city that we live in so that my husband can help her to settle down despite of the fact that she has many other friends that she personally knows in other states. He finally picked up her phone call again. The girls asked her if she should continue to pursue the green card and my husband said that she really should because her future is better in the States. The way I found out is through my constant monitoring of his emails and phone calls. I am sick and tired of doing this and I don't know if it is still worthed to stay in this marriage. The only thing that makes me stay is remembering how nice my husband was and how many common interests that we used to share when we were dating. She will be coming this fall and I don't know what to do. I feel very insecure because I know that she knows our address, my husband's office and even my husband's family's address and phone number. Please anybody advice me on what to do. I need help. Thank you.

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 571
A
Member
Member
A Offline
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 571
Your H is having an EA.

And after your numerous attempts to put it thru to your H about how you are feeling and him not acknowledging it is wrong. Hes suppose to make you feel safe.Hes not doing so by allowing another female to keep contact that you are not comfortable with.

I would highly recommend if your H loves you and he respects your wishes that IF she comes to the states he does not have continued contact. Yes he needs to break the contact now too.

This OW has gone beyond and threatend you. And your H still talks to her? What is his excuse that he is continuing contact AFTER the threat she gave? Does he even know that she did that?

I suggest he NC this OW NOW and start to focus on whats important. YOU and your M.

Weekends are slow so be patient and others will come and offer there share.

Last edited by A_pretty_face; 08/10/08 12:27 PM.

Married 1996
4 wonderful children 16, 13 *OC*, 10, 7
FWW 30's
FWH 30's
My dday 1-2007 he came clean to me

My story
New beginings

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 237 guests, and 12 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Countfunkula, mollye14, Pansu, sakyt, George Mixflicke
72,372 Registered Users
Latest Posts
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,659
Posts2,323,613
Members72,372
Most Online9,682
May 13th, 2026
deneme bonusu
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2025, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 8.0.0