Had it out last night with H. Im at the end of my rope with him. We have been together for 18 years. I had a dvt (blood clot in my leg and my lung) i am lucky to be here...now i have had complications from everything. I was on warfarin for 6 months. I am now off and having other problems. I have had my period almost every 2 - 3 weeks and when i do it lasts almost 12 days, this time it was 2.5 weeks. Doc says just to wait it out 3 months and we will see if it works itself out. He said he wants me to avoid surgery and can't have hormones because way to dangerous...life threatining for me. So here i am worrying without no support as it could be something wrong..something i have to have surgery for, which is dangerous for me. I told H what doc said.
So last night i come to bed, i have had my period for 2.5 weeks. I come to bed and H freaks out at me, starts saying this isn't normal and i think its a good way to avoid me. I got upset I said ya it isn't normal and I think something is wrong, I told you what the doctor said and there is nothing i can do because its too much of a risk for them to do anything right now. He just went off on me saying well i just find it all suspicious, i guess i will "believe" you in a snide tone..meaning he thinks im bullshitting him. I couldn't believe it! He is so self absorbed. I told him well thanks for your concern, it really makes me feel good that you are concerned about me and that maybe something may be wrong. He went off saying its been like over a month (when it hasn't) and i try to explain that to him the dates...and he starts getting mad saying [censored]...its been like over a month. I couldn't believe it. I am so at the end of my rope today! THis just shows the lack of care he really has for me. and thanks alot! You know you would think he would be like are you okay, i am worried about you. NO...all he is thinking is im not getting any.
I went and slept on couch and said thanks alot for your concern, he then had the nerve to say "oh ya there you go turn it on me, make it my fault"
He left this morning, was very noisy (he gets up early) and did not say a word to me, not one word. NOw he is obviously mad and thinking yup she is just trying to avoid me. Even though i am always the one that comes to him for a hug, im the one that comes to him for kisses, i am constantly doing it, and he rarely if ever comes to me.
I dont' know what to do here...im so at the end of my rope. I mean here i am worrying constantly of getting another clot, worrying something else is wrong with me and he comes up with this. WHAT A JERK!

Pent up sexual tension is very frustrating, whether you are male or female.

I know that you have been suffering a tremendous amount, don't get me wrong, but in the spirit of still meeting your H needs, can you be creative about SF.

I think your creativity would far pay off for the peace in your M and could help with the AO and DJ. Playing the right/wrong game is just going to cause continued misery.

Just my opinion.

Good luck and hope you get well soon. I had a hysterectomy after severe female issues and it was the best day of my life.

My husband acted pretty much the same right after I had my son. I had major complications before and after so sex wasn't in the picture for 2-3 months. The more he acted angry and selfish the more I saw someone I didn't like. It was horrible.

It got so bad that when we went to the doctors for me to go through yet another horrendously painful treatment (being cut, stitched, sewn, ripped open again, etc) he would have the gall to keep asking the nurse "when can she have sex"!! I was humiliated and hurt to say the least. Finally the nurse had enough of it and told him "that's what God made your hand for, now get over yourself and start thinking about what this woman is going through"!!

Yep, sexual tension is a bugger but guess what stuff happens, sometimes you have to get over yourself and make the needs of your spouse a priority instead of acting like a two year old not getting your way and throwing a tantrum. What did that get your husband, you being more upset and feeling like he doesn't give a darn about you. Yep that makes you want to rip off your clothes and give him what he wants.

Sorry but "in the spirit of meeting his needs" needs to be tossed out the window. I had a gapping infected hole in my stomach for three months so the only creative thing I could think about was when and how many pain killers to take so I could make it another hour and still take care of a new born. Oral and hand job just didn't seem to come to mind.

FedUp, hang in there. I promise my husbands penis didn't fall off and he didn't keel over from lack of sex. Been 25 years and if he would have wanted to leave then I would have helped him pack his bags.

OnlyU-I to had a hysterectomy in Feb and it was the best decision but I don't see what that has to do with what FedUp is going through since it is apparent she has medical issues that preclude her from having surgery?