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Originally Posted by aussieswife
What about TEXAS ???????????
10 reasons to live in Texas ......

10. A beer now and then never hurt anything. laugh

9. The San Antonio River Walk on a Saturday night.... you get to shoot the varmint's hurray

8. The Lone Star flying high all over the place. uhuh

7. Howard Hughes..... mmmmmmm ???????? :crosseyedcrazy:

6. Texas gave the world Dr. Pepper. whistle

5. Texas could show other states how to fix barbecue ... the Aussies taught them how stickout

4. You get to have your hair all fluffed up.... its the law hurray

3. Bluebonnets. cool

2. Are you a Republic like Texas? Oh well, keep working on it. laugh

1. The Hill Country in Spring. sigh

Quote
"I'll meet you at the Alamo Mission at midnight and we'll kneel to pray..."

You forgot another really good reason to move here...

I'll cook for you if you do (and I won't even put meat in it).


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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Originally Posted by Dealan-de
You forgot another really good reason to move here...

I'll cook for you if you do (and I won't even put meat in it).


Almost thou persuadest me to be a Texan... rotflmao

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Okay.

Didja see my house plans?

You too could have a ginormous house like that...and Neaksis too...for under $200k.

Does that sweeten the pot any?

Oh...and the subdivision is ON a golf course.

I'll even let you drive our golf cart....




All kidding aside, what do you know about windmills, solar panels, rainwater harvesting/purification, composting, and composting utilizing vermiculture?

We're planning to be as self contained as possible by 2010-2011.

As soon as we move in we're going to put in solar panels and maybe a windmill. We're also going to put in an underground rainwater storage tank.

I've almost talked the Wookie into composting the dog poo utilizing vermiculture (worms)...it seems the safest way to be rid of the stuff, plus it becomes a nitrate rich fertilizer.

So...my gardening friend...help...please?


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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O M G (goodness)
think

Kimmy... T&L .... Neaksis ....PLUS .. maybe Neak ...all in TEXAS ......... all TOGETHER .... :crosseyedcrazy: dance2

Texas ... be afraid .... be very afraid faint



hehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehhehe


Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.

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Oh my....I agree! That's an awful lot for even Big Ole' TEXAS!

I wonder which one will be the dog poo collector?? NOT IT!
We've composted lots of stinky stuff, but not dog poo.

O.k. girls and boy(s), guess what today is? The first day of my retirement. Yep, took the last youngun off to school and today I am retired. No more MOM for me.

And guess what I did on my first day of retirement? I called my daughter (who I just saw yesterday), and then called my son (that I just dropped off last night), and I would have called my other son, but he was all ready at work.

Maybe I should try semi-retired for awhile and move into full on retirement later. I'm sure they still need mothering, even if it is long distance. wink

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Greetings...this is your princess posting from her home in the Central time zone. This morning, I was at the airport at 5:30 - a 45 minute drive from my hotel - to catch a 7:00 flight. Of course, I had to take a shower and get dressed before leaving the hotel. So, I was up at about 4:00 Eastern time. Do you see a problem? sleep

It's 10:38 a.m here now - and I've been up since about 3:00 a.m. as my body understands time. sleep

Is it time for a nap? sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep pray sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep rant2 sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep faint sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep

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I've composted before, too...but was always told NOT to use dog poo.

But I found this online:

Dog Poo Composting Link

I always worried about "throwing" it away. That's not exactly legal or sanitary.

But this eliminates the waste, AND turns it into something usable.

I'm also trying to teach the kids that God made EVERYTHING recyclable for a reason...and our choices for products and things we use everyday should be made with His plan in mind.

I think that if this works, it'll help loads in all sorts of categories.

BTW: Did you know that if every household in the US bought 100% recycled/bleach free paper napkins JUST once in place of their usual napkins, it would save 2.4 MILLION trees?


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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Cinderella!! Hi.
After I posted, I wondered why I hadn't seen ya around, and then I remembered!! You saw the Diplomat this weekend!! blush

No wonder you're tired! All that travel and all wink

Hope you had a great time! Get a nap and come back and tell us all about it....well almost all... blush

Kimmy...I have been wanting to start a compost bin here at the house for all the garden waste. We have only done compost on a commercial scale so it is much different than for the household stuff. If you do it right commercially, it can be finished in a very short time (I want to say a month or so?? can't remember). We haven't done it for a couple years now, but I still have my own personal stash to work out of....I love it!!

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I had a good time. No computer access can be a good thing. Headed for my nap, now.

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That pesky man hazzta get useta farming cooties no matter where we go. In the meantime, all medical lectures welcomed.

Dad and the kids left early this morning, missed a turn in Sidney, and wound up out by Fort Peck Lake. Finally they are back on course after a lovely scenic detour, and last I heard were in Miles City to have "a french fry" at DQ. Not sure if that was one apiece, or if they're cutting it in thirds.

Coupla zingers over the last few days. One I remember offhand: Mr. C, speaking of all the harvesting going on, said, "Concubines are very dangerous." True, true.

I'll have to remember what the other ones were.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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OMG. Two whole days were good and now the [censored] has hit the fan. I told H the other night I hoped we would become better buddies now that the kids are all but gone...and it is what I want.

However, I realize I have waited many years for this day. The day the kids were "gone" and I could leave. But I was really feeling like I don't want that and I would rather stay and really work on the marriage of my dreams. And then...

H comes home from and AA meeting last night and was SO HAPPY because he talked to "Mary" and she had first hand knowledge of some job activity moving into our area and she had phone numbers etc. He was ecstatic as he told me "I told her I'll be in to see you tomorrow to get the numbers, HECK I'LL EVEN TAKE YOU TO LUNCH".

I just looked at him and asked "Don't you think you should have run that by me first?" It had never crossed his mind and I totally burst his bubble. He was only thinking of the job part of things and didn't consider how inappropriate it was to take this gal to lunch. (She is someone I know).

I asked something else about lining up some work he was talking about for later this week and it got all twisted up. He was saying rotten stuff but I totally remember the conversation differently than him. It really is unbelievable how differently we heard it. To the point of I was going to cancel some stuff and instead when he talked to the people involved, he confirmed he would do the work and when. I asked how he would get it all done, since that day was already full and that had all changed too. ???

I tried to go in and talk to him about it all (and apologize for the misunderstanding) and he just told me to forget it, F it he just won't work any more, is gonna quit working and on and on.

He is still blaming it on me this morning and I told him I find it hard to believe he would think it is ok to go to lunch and further insulting that when I am concerned he goes off on me instead of trying to understand/protect me. He said he probably won't go and I told him that is fine, but do it for the right reasons and don't blame me. He then said "It's ok, I'm just a dumb f-up, too stupid to get it". I told him to get off the pity pot. He told me I was on the pity pot. I left.

Now I'm crying. I don't want it to be like this, but it always has been. I haven't had the melt down after dropping the kid off at school and now it's here, combined with my H's arrogant attitude. Wow.

How does this chit happen? I'm more concerned than ever that it will always be this way, and now I am more free to go than ever, or insist on change, but will I? Or am I too scared to stand up for myself? I've always been too afraid.

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First of all, most of this is his problem. He doesn't like your boundaries and didn't think of protecting you, and now he is pouting because you weren't as happy about his boundary breaches as he was.

I don't know if he will get it, but I wouldn't advise automatically giving up, either. I just think it's time for some stern, strong action. Exactly what that looks like is up to you, but maybe come on here and brainstorm what your potential responses should be when he tries to provoke you or intimidate/manipulate you into backing down.

You're going to be ok. {{{{{{{MAL}}}}}}}}


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Neak said:
".....but now have to finish my breakfast so I can go buck some hay."

The only jobs here when I was growing up were farm jobs. Hauling hay, milking cows, and so on. Now there are homes where most of the farms used to be. I think it was good for us to be close to the land, and actually know where milk came from. Some of the kids I ask "do you know where milk comes from?" say "every one knows that, it comes from the store."
Sorry, I got sucked back into the mists of time. Ah well, humidity is supposed to be good for your skin.

"Dad's sermon yesterday was nice - will comment more on that later if I have the time."

Dad........ the clam?
I wish I could have heard it.
Not trying to be funny, I really wish I could have heard it.


It sounds like AW is buried in projects

Again.

I guess that is good. It keeps you busy, and out of trouble. Or it may keep you in trouble. blush
I suppose it depends on the way you look at it. How does Aussie look at it?

I would really like to hear your daughter comment on that one.


T&L said:
"We went swimming today at the public pool near Boise ID. I dived off the high dive once, mainly because Neaksis doubted my ability to do it. "

I wonder if she doubted, or if she just wanted you to do it, so she said it in such a way that.......

I should probably shut up.
(SS mutters under his breath - "I should have liked to see it too, I really would have." )

Kimmy said:
"T&L and Tucktummy -

New online game addiction - Boggle."

I don't have time for Boggle.
Sigh............. I wish I did.

Was it one of Charles Shultz's characters that said "Life gets complicateder and complicateder."

"When I'm in my dotage and the kids have moved out, I am SO going to go to Boggle tourneys."

You will not. You'll be too busy being a grandma. And going on trips with the Wookie.
It's better than Boggle anyway.


Neak said:
"Had to take AJ to the hosp in the middle of the night for difficulty breathing. Apparently all this trouble he's been having is due to asthma, brought on by ???

2 breathing treatments and some IV steroids later, and he's fine except for all the sore muscles from coughing and wheezing for hours before he gave up and went in.

He has to visit the doc later today and get some inhalers. That's my last 12 hours in a nutshell."

Sorry for both of you. I see real life still goes on, and on. Glad there was a hospital, and glad there is some relief. Please tell AJ hi for me. I hope he is doing better now.

SS thinks some more.........
I hope you are getting enough sleep.


AW on AJ's medical problems:
"now remember Neak .. count to 10 before you say anything."

You made me laugh AW. Thanks, I needed that.


T&L said:
"I think if you get sick, due to environmental considerations, less than 2 months after you move there temporarily, it's just possible that it may not be an optimal place to plan to move to permanently. That's what I think. Not that anybody's asked me..."


I still haven't heard much about the move, except that it's in progress.
Anyone?

Well, reading on down I see T&L commented on it some. Not enough, but some.
A major move is a difficult thing in more ways than just the move. I probably shouldn't be asking about it.


I read all the comments about moving to Texas, and Australia. It sounds wonderful, but I think I'll stay here.

I also (though it was difficult) read the comments on dog poo.
We just put ours on the compost pile, and tilled it into the garden in the spring. I never felt it was a problem.

We put all the compostable stuff from our house in a 1 1/2 gal tub on the kitchen counter, and when full, it goes out to the compost heap in the garden. This heap moves around the garden from year to year, and every spring, it gets tilled in. I notice that things planted where this heap was located (the last two or three years) grow much bigger than the others around them. The twins don't like emptying the tub, and rinsing it out, but long term it does help the garden. It also cuts down on what goes into the land fill.
Kimimy, my boys figured out long ago how to save on napkins. (serviettes to you AW)
They just wiped their face and hands on their shirt tail.
I should have a talk with Mr C, and the Dervish. They could start saving too.

CAN YOU BELIEVE THE NERVE OF CINDERELLA.
"I had a good time. "

That's It?
That's all?
BTW, it's fun to tease you. I hope it feels like teasing on your end.
SS chuckles, and goes on.

Neak said:
"last I heard were in Miles City to have "a french fry" at DQ. Not sure if that was one apiece, or if they're cutting it in thirds."

That made me laugh too. I love the humor on this thread.


M&L,
So sorry. I know we can't fix it. I won't give you advice, but will say that you are in our prayers.

Can I ask some questions though?
What are you thinking?
This is ongoing. When you have good days, you don't think about it. When you have bad days, all the thoughts come flooding back.

So, the question, what are you thinking?


Through the grace of God we can change, but some people don't want to change. I am wondering what would prompt him to want to change.
I discovered one day(long ago) that my W wanted to leave. She did not, but she wanted to. I began to change. We are happier now than we have ever been, so I know it is possible for things to improve.

Just don't go along thinking that no one cares, and that you are all alone. OK?

Hi Neaksis. Good job with the High Dive. I would have loved to be there.

Hi CC. Good winter?
Would love to know how you are.
How are the girls?


Wishing everyone well.

SS




I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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Hi everyone,

I'm just too lazy to write. I'm into knitting, it is winter after all!

It's been cold and rainy but every now and then we get some beautiful sunny days grin

The house hasn't sold.

I've had a couple of meetings with WH to solve some financial issues, and I've been totally indifferent to him. No emotions. It's a bit strange but just goes to show how "real life" is different from what we imagine. He behaves as though it were completely normal. Never mentions OW or his life.

He started the divorce proceedings but doesn't seem to have a good connection with his lawyer. I got a very nice lawyer who really seems to care about me, although legally there is not much he can do for me. Hopefully the whole thing will be simple and only require one meeting with the judge, some day, I don't know when yet.

The girls are very independant, working and studying and getting together with friends, so I don't see much of them. But that's what it should be at their age.

work is work. Not too bad.

I'm enjoying the peace and quiet.

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Neak,
Thanks for your reply.
I know this is his problem. He doesn't have boundaries. Never has.

I don't know if he will get it either. I really doubt it. If he doesn't think he is doing anything wrong, what's to change? The only reason I have continued to think that when the kids are all gone, so am I is because of the lack of change.

I don't know what strong, stern action looks like either. I am thinking about it.

He didn't go today. I wouldn't have cared if he did. Just indifferent. If he doesn't get it, and can't accept that chit like that is wrong, after being repeatedly told how it feels to me, then what is there to work with?

I know I'll be o.k.

Thanks!

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Quote
M&L,
So sorry. I know we can't fix it. I won't give you advice, but will say that you are in our prayers.

Can I ask some questions though?
What are you thinking?
This is ongoing. When you have good days, you don't think about it. When you have bad days, all the thoughts come flooding back.

So, the question, what are you thinking?


Through the grace of God we can change, but some people don't want to change. I am wondering what would prompt him to want to change.
I discovered one day(long ago) that my W wanted to leave. She did not, but she wanted to. I began to change. We are happier now than we have ever been, so I know it is possible for things to improve.

Just don't go along thinking that no one cares, and that you are all alone. OK?

What am I thinking?
You nailed it. This is ongoing. We have a few days that I do well, and then he starts up with some injustice he is suffering and it all becomes my fault, or the kids.

He is constantly saying things that make me think he feels like I am not pulling my weight around here. He'll say I should go clean his white truck (semi) so I have some appreciation for what goes into making a living. ?? Ouch. Where did that come from?

I think it is his guilt. He has put a large (to me) amount of money into his trading account so he could do what he wants. That's all he wants to do is be a trader. I have kept my yap shut and never made a negative comment about it. And let me tell ya, it was hard! He says the reason he never made any money before was because he was listening to others and everyone was so negative. So, I was quiet and he has lost over half of his money. At the time he wanted to put the money in his account and I expressed my concerns, he told me I could have an equal amount to dabble in some things I had talked about. Mine is still there, nothing missing. His is over half gone and he works at it all day , every day (until the last month or so).

I think as long as he is trading (addiction), and is so defensive about it, nothing will change. If I were to say I didn't want the money to go in the trading account, he would try real hard not to, but would then tell me, it is his money. He worked real hard for it and should be able to have it. Never mind we need it to pay for the last adventure he wanted real bad (the business).

So, as to your question, what will make him want to change? I really don't know. I have tried a lot of things and he is still not happy. It is like Neak said, this is his problem.

He has put himself in the position he is in and he tries to blame me for it. He has just what he wanted. What he doesn't want is for me to have an opinion about it. So, I have kept busy and stayed away while he does what he wants and still he is miserable. But I don't want to live like this.

And an in person support system-don't have it. I appreciate you all listening to me. I do feel alone.

Sorry for rambling.

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Sorry for rambling.

It doesn't look like rambling to me. Do you understand why you would say that though?

Neak had some good comments. She recommended strong action.
The choices are always the same.

1. Let things stay the same.
2. Change something (Neak recommends drastic change.)
3. Leave.

You have tried all the things you could think of, and none of them have worked. You consider number 3, because number one is too draining on you, and number two has not worked so far.

I recommend number two too. ( I think I was around 2long too long.)

He may sense your unease, and do things to help you back to number one, but I recommend you keep thinking about this, and try some things. Must go for tonight, but would you mind recapping the things you have done under the number 2 heading?

Perhaps we can get some really good ideas for changes that might help you with this.

BTW, I need to repent. I called Cinderella on the carpet for not giving more information, and we did a vacation in Julyand didn't say much either. I promise photos withing a week. OK Cinderella?


F&L, it's nice to have "in person" help, but God is the best help of all, and you can reach him at any time. I hope you feel his love, and care, and know that he is, and that the help will come over time.
Sometimes we get external help, and sometimes the help is internal. Just know it will come.

Must go for now.

SS



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Read your comments CC. No time to reply - but thanks, and will get back to you.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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MAL, you want to get advice from Neakbro on stocks? He's my oldest son and quite steeped in that sort of stuff. Maybe you could make a lot of money with your part while your husband fritters away his. If it were me in your shoes, I'd ENJOY something like that!! blush My bad.

Hi SS. Glad to hear from your neck of the woods. I start back to work in 6 days. I'm dreading it. My surgery did not work and I'm actually worse off than before the operation. I've walked 600 miles and worn out a pair of shoes, trying to break of the post-op scar tissue...but no such luck. Still I have to try because disability doesn't pay like working--that's for sure. But if I work more than 2 wks. and can't cut it I can file a new claim, good for another year and only slightly less than I'm making now. I guess, under the circumstances, if that's how it was I'd have to teach the homeschooler so that both Neak and AJ could work. Combining all that would give us enough $$ to survive and I was probably going to end up teaching him anyway. We'll see. It's the uncertainty that's driving me nuts. A month from now when I know how it's going to turn out, it will be better, no matter what happens.

My dad, Neakbro, and I are going to make one last trip to HI for the big school reunion in mid-September. This will be my dad's last trip. He won't physically be able to make it again, but so many of his old friends are going to be there that I just couldn't let him miss it...especially since it will be paid for by his tax refunds for the last 3 years. Good thing we didn't do them on time, huh? Otherwise the $$ would've been LONG spent! I'm taking Neakbro because I don't think I could really manage to get him around to places all by myself any more. And, no, I didn't even ask my husband if he wanted to go. The last time we went he said he was never going again if he had more luggage than a carry-on. He was pushing an airport cart with 4 suitcases and a box of pineapple at the time so I somewhat sympathized with him...but there's no way I could pack lightly enough to make it palatable for him, so I took him at his word and made other arrangements.

I'd planned to take Flard, but he just started his new job as a professor of biology in OK, and didn't think it was a good time to ask for a week off just yet! grin Party pooper.




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