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Hi, CC. Saw your post after I'd done mine. As far as Neaksis and the dive, she did NOT want me to do it. I think she was afraid my weight would drive me straight into the bottom of the pool and break my neck. :RollieEyes: She drew a hilarious drawing of the dive for the friend at whose house we were sleeping that night. If I can find a way to post it I will. It's not flattering at all. But doggone funny. :MrEEk:

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TnL....I understand. I would love to make some with mine. I figure I am way ahead because it's still there and I have not moved one red cent and not worried one little bit about it. His is over half gone and he has worked his guts out on it. No exaggeration at all...from the time he gets up till the market closes and usually more. And talks about it non-stop. I hate it.

SS....I am thinking...alot...


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It doesn't look like rambling to me. Do you understand why you would say that though?

Because I don't think anyone wants to hear it. Because I think that you all think I am whining.

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but would you mind recapping the things you have done under the number 2 heading?


What I have done is try to remove myself from some of his stuff. Like scheduling. I don't schedule anything for him anymore and I don't promise his services at all. People have to talk to him. He makes a mess, not my fault. He's too busy, promised too much in a day/week/month, too bad. Does he still get mad and grumpy? Yep. Do I feel guilty? Nope. Not at all. I just keep my mouth shut. He still doesn't get it..that he did it to himself and I take the brunt of it...but it doesn't get to me like it used to.

I have removed myself from getting his help lined up for him. He said YS never helps him on jobs and so the other day I asked son to help dad and told him that dad would be back in a minute. (H said I am going to go to the shop and then I am going to go do this job and he drove off.) I look in a few minutes and H is off doing something totally different and was gone for a few hours, and didn't go do the job like he said. He is notorious for getting us all lined up to help and then dilly-dally for so long we have to go do other stuff (like hours later) and then gets mad because everyone left. He said he needed help for tomorrow and friday and our friend gave someone's name and I'll bet you big bucks that H never called the guy and tomorrow he will whine because he doesn't have any help. I am staying out of it.

I'll add more as I think of them.

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Originally Posted by still seeking
BTW, I need to repent. I called Cinderella on the carpet for not giving more information, and we did a vacation in Julyand didn't say much either. I promise photos withing a week. OK Cinderella?

SS

You want the scoop?

Last Thursday, I went to Florida to see The Diplomat who was there on business. Hotel points and frequent flyer miles are good things?

Friday morning, I looked out the window of my hotel room window, before I got up, and saw nothing but blue sky and waving palm tree branches. That afternoon, I got guest services at the hotel to drive me to the Boca Raton Museum of Art which was 3.5 miles away. Then I went to Mizner Park shopping center and spent $5 on a banana chocolate vivano at Starbucks.

That night, we went out to dinner. And the topic of discussion turned to what to do for the weekend. Since they had evacuated the tourists from the Keys, we decided to go to Key West. So, that's where we were Saturday and Sunday.

Monday, I flew home. He had kindly booked me on a 7 a.m. flight so I could actually have worked most of the day Monday. But, I had to be at the airport around 5:30 which meant we had to leave the hotel at 4:30 which meant I had to get up about 3:45. That was Eastern time....my body was still pretty much on Central time......Do you see a problem?

Anyway, we had a good time.

There are no beaches on Key West except for one state park and we didn't get there. But, I did have some excellent Key Lime Pie.

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CC Said:
I'm just too lazy to write. I'm into knitting, it is winter after all!



I would have never called you lazy. Not someone who has accomplished what you have since your H bailed out on you.

I think it's cool that you are into knitting.

It's been cold and rainy but every now and then we get some beautiful sunny days grin

Rainy days are better for reading, and knitting.

The house hasn't sold.


What are your plans when it does?

I've had a couple of meetings with WH to solve some financial issues, and I've been totally indifferent to him. No emotions. It's a bit strange but just goes to show how "real life" is different from what we imagine. He behaves as though it were completely normal. Never mentions OW or his life.

He has never admitted anything, has he?
How do you feel these days when you meet with him?

He started the divorce proceedings but doesn't seem to have a good connection with his lawyer. I got a very nice lawyer who really seems to care about me, although legally there is not much he can do for me. Hopefully the whole thing will be simple and only require one meeting with the judge, some day, I don't know when yet.

I am still sorry it ended this way. MB stuff really does work, he could have been so much better off with you if he had been willing to work on things. It really sounds like you just want it over with. I suppose that will help in a way - you won't have to deal with him any more.

The girls are very independant, working and studying and getting together with friends, so I don't see much of them. But that's what it should be at their age.

Our children were like that too - until they married, then they started coming round more often. We have nice family gatherings these days. You will have fun with that when it comes .

work is work. Not too bad.

That made me laugh too - work is indeed work. Life goes on though, doesn't it.

I'm enjoying the peace and quiet.

Will you be making any big changes when the house sells?

Thanks again for the update.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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Hi SS. Glad to hear from your neck of the woods. I start back to work in 6 days. I'm dreading it. My surgery did not work and I'm actually worse off than before the operation.

I kept hoping you were getting better, and better. I didn't know that there was no progress. I don't know what to say now. It's not like I can fix it, or make it better. I wish there were some way we could help. Prayer.... but I mean beyond that.

I've walked 600 miles and worn out a pair of shoes, trying to break of the post-op scar tissue...but no such luck. Still I have to try because disability doesn't pay like working--that's for sure. But if I work more than 2 wks. and can't cut it I can file a new claim, good for another year and only slightly less than I'm making now. I guess, under the circumstances, if that's how it was I'd have to teach the homeschooler so that both Neak and AJ could work. Combining all that would give us enough $$ to survive and I was probably going to end up teaching him anyway.

Let us know how it goes. Please?

We'll see. It's the uncertainty that's driving me nuts. A month from now when I know how it's going to turn out, it will be better, no matter what happens.

Understood. I am working on my own faith. Faith that no matter how things go, God will make it work for me. We stay awake nights thinking about things, when we ought to be sleeping. He'll hold up his end, if you will let him. (As I said, I keep telling my self that same thing.)

My dad, Neakbro, and I are going to make one last trip to HI for the big school reunion in mid-September. This will be my dad's last trip. He won't physically be able to make it again, but so many of his old friends are going to be there that I just couldn't let him miss it...especially since it will be paid for by his tax refunds for the last 3 years. Good thing we didn't do them on time, huh? Otherwise the $$ would've been LONG spent!

I love Hawaii too. There is a good spirit there, among the Hawaiian people. I need to take W, but she spend her Hawaii money last summer on the cruise we did. You go and have a great time, and post photos. We'll Ohhhhh,and Ahhhhh and wish we could have been there with you.

I'm taking Neakbro because I don't think I could really manage to get him around to places all by myself any more. And, no, I didn't even ask my husband if he wanted to go. The last time we went he said he was never going again if he had more luggage than a carry-on. He was pushing an airport cart with 4 suitcases and a box of pineapple at the time so I somewhat sympathized with him...but there's no way I could pack lightly enough to make it palatable for him, so I took him at his word and made other arrangements.

There you go again, making me laugh. It's the opposite with us. I have the little case. I take it that the Bro is doing OK these days?

I'd planned to take Flard, but he just started his new job as a professor of biology in OK, and didn't think it was a good time to ask for a week off just yet! grin Party pooper.

I hope he does well. You do too.
Maybe you can all go live with him. That might work out, if you can sneak up on him. Move in while he's at work. He would get used to it in a few years.

I'm still thinking about the two years I lived in Alberta, Canada. I start to shiver when I think about it, and my ears (the ones that got frostbitten) start to hurt. It's nigh on to winter way up north. I like the country........ but northern winters were hard on me. I need to change the subject. My hands are getting stiff, and I can't type when I shiver like this.

Where's the down comforter? Oh wait, it's really summer, and over 100 degrees outside. I'll just walk out for a minute, and warm up.

Really though, thanks for the update. I did want to know. You are in our prayers. All of you.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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Because I don't think anyone wants to hear it. Because I think that you all think I am whining.

Because he has put you down so many times that you have started to believe what he tells you.

Know this -
You are valuable. You have talents, and abilities, but in and of yourself, you have value. You are a daughter of God. That makes you royalty.

You were telling us what was going on, and we want to help, and needed to hear it to be able to do that. You were afraid it was too much.

There is information here, just in this little part of this that ought to help you make decisions on what to do. In the long term, I believe you will do well. IN the short term, believe in yourself, and in your worth as a person, and know that you are lovable, and capable, and that we care.

I could say more about this part............ much more.

But - it's time to close up for the night. Don't be afraid to tell us how you feel. You have no enemies here, only friends.

We'll talk more as we go along.

When we were in WY, we took a picture of your house as we went by. I'll post it later on. I'll edit out any identifying features, so no one will be able to tell exactly.

Thanks Cinderella. That's better. Now we just need photos.

Night all -

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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stillseeking, my dear friend!! What are you doing over here on a thread with all these females titled Feminine Hygiene Products?? Did that mean thunderandlightening make you come here?? cry Shall I call 911, buddy??


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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When the house sells I will find an apartment for myself and move! That will be a lot of work... that's why I'm enjoying the peace and quiet now.

The girls will move to their own place, WH will be helping them with the rent.

So life will then be very different! I'm looking forward to it.

WH never admitted anything. I feel very sorry for him, but he's his own worst enemy and I don't think I can do anything about it. He has been "generous" financially, and assured me that he will continue paying all the house bills until the house is sold, even if we get divorced before that.


I have managed to refrain from telling him that thre is no reason for me to trust him...I told him I felt "insecure" and he reassured me that he would keep his word! He has uptil now. My lawyer doesn't trust him either, but I guess he isn't a "normal" WH in that sense.

Anyway it will soon be over.

I remember how I felt at 20-21 years of age so I understand the girls. I try not to complain about the lack of help with chores because I know that soon they will have to manage on their own. And I will be free.

And then we will all have a different kind of relationship!

All things to look forward to.

At work nothing much is happening, but again, you never know. Next year is election year so there will soon be changes again.



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SS !!! missed you but hope all is very well with you and yours.

Only have myself to blame though... lazy tired and simply slacking off. no excuses ... well only a few stickout I am getting older.. Mikey is getting faster .... dyeing the grey worry hairs out is getting to be a BIG job laugh .... I have so much work here to complete I'm frightened to start :MrEEk: .... spending heaps of time supporting wives with injured hubbies the poor darlings ... so young some of them. .... pushing my own worries about my boys into the back ground because as my DD husband said to us "nah no worries love just shot up a bit" :RollieEyes:

Begging your pardon SS ... but ... well ... sometimes men (some men anyway) are just STUPID think

Mal you come talk ANYTIME... we don't think you whine at all. Neak may be onto something though about what YOU do. not great at giving advice myself.... need to think on it... hug

Rella... you have such good times and keep quite about it ... not fair at all naughty .... we NEED details grin

CC yes things will change and you watch how suddenly your girls will realise ALL those things you do for them. Mine did and came home ... with her H rotflmao ok teasing my DD but its allowed. I do pray though it will give you some peace on the WH front. And don't worry... the girls will be over .... pretty often .... especially if you nag them about it hurray

T&L do you know I have your letter almost finished but I will type it out cause my writing is shocking.... and there is apple custard on it.. and blackberry juice. Oh did I tell you I am part time looking after a 12 year old? can't remember dontknow anyway young James suffers from a slight mental disability ... mostly learning and is at times difficult for his mum to deal with with another 4 kids in the house. So I sort of help out and he stays a night or two with us. Mikey has a great time with him and he's so polite and gentle.

Liz has them out at the shopping centre right now while she gets her hair cut. Its a treat for him to have the Big Mac's.

I was in Sydney on Monday & Tuesday to see my 3 girls do the Oxfam concert. I'll talk to you about that. Mum is concerned ..and I about wiped the bank account too. I've got the blood money of course but only if Mikey or the girls are starving. sick

well I have to go pick them up they are ready for collection from the shops grumble

SS I know what napkins are ... I mean .... ... we have MAC's here after all rotflmao dance2



Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.

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custard on it.. and blackberry juice.

How did you, way over THERE, make the Dervish write me a letter? dontknow

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dyeing the grey worry hairs out is getting to be a BIG job

Don't dye the silver. It's your inner value popping out.

This morning Rebekah, my oldest dau, was running her fingers through my hair.

"I love your hair, mom," she sighed. Especially the sparkly ones.

So I told her the Norse myth about Sif and Thor and Loki and how Loki was so jealous of Sif's beautiful hair that he turned himself into a flame and burned it all up. Then Thor, who was Sif's husband, was so distraught to see his beautiful and loving wife so sad because of her lost hair that he had the trolls forge her new hair out of gold and silver because he loved her so much and wanted her to be happy.

But I prefer to think that it's my inner beauty coming out...makes a much better story.

Leondra and Rebekah were rapt at the myth, tho.


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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Whoa....blackberries.....I'm on my way over. I LOVE blackberries!

I also love that story about the hair. have never heard it. My hair is sort of a medium brown so the gathering silver is only so-so. My daughter informed me three weeks ago that she thought it was time to start coloring it. I am loathe to start that never ending process. Maybe I should just throw some henna at it and let it go.

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Cinders,

Wanna come for dessert?

I still have a baggie of frozen blackberries from my mom's garden.

It makes wonderful blackberry sauce for angel food cake.

I'll read stories to you and the kids from my Norse Gods and Giants book...


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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And I quit coloring my hair earlier this year. I'd been coloring it since 1987 or so.

I have a few sparkles...not a lot.

But I earned them...and they are sparkly.

I love them.


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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Hi Kimbers!!! Liz here hug

I wanna come for dessert I just love blackberries. When we lived as tin lids on the row we had this huge blackberry that we ate from as we wanted from when they were in season. Of course mum wasn't as keen about it due to our clothes being dyed this bluey black colour hurray never saw a problem myself stickout

Hey SS you wanted to know what dad thinks about mums various projects? think

well dad first downs a few Guinness (he says it always makes him look at things in a relaxed light ) :RollieEyes: looks at the latest project, goes 'uhuh', 'yep', 'mutter mutter', then 'S I G H S " in a resigned tone where mum can't hear,
and then turns around and smiles at mum and says "Doing a great job honey' - Nana says he's well trained my dad kiss

But then dad's idea of luxury is a tent with sides rotflmao

Hi Mrs S - Neaksis hows that gang? Angel girl I swear you r.

Now girls time to sing along -

This is every girl's dream
No milk left for your tea
Baby's crying louder than me
Who lost the keys of your car
Sorry that would be me

I'd wake up only I'm not asleep
I have daydreams like no other
So romantic you'll discover

I wanna take you for granted
Drift while you're talking
Bathe while you're downstairs
And chat on the phone
Fall asleep before bedtime
Pass in the hallway
Forget your birthday
And shrink all your clothes
(I wanna)
(I wanna)

I have visions like no other
So romantic you'll discover
I wanna take you for granted
Drift while you're talking
Bathe while you're downstairs
And chat on the phone
Fall asleep before bedtime
Pass in the hallway
Forget your birthday
And shrink all your clothes

Let me take you for granted
Drift while you're talking
Bathe while you're downstairs
And chat on the phone
Fall asleep before bedtime
Pass in the hallway
Forget your birthday
And shrink all your clothes
(I wanna)
(I Wanna)
Did I say that out loud?

rotflmao dance2 lashes



Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.

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Mrs VDK, the happy dance icon was dancing in time to the music on my computer. Then, the music changed. Too bad.

But, I propose a big blackberry eating party!!

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I'm right there with ya sista!

Got my spoon ready!


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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Originally Posted by MelodyLane
stillseeking, my dear friend!! What are you doing over here on a thread with all these females titled Feminine Hygiene Products?? Did that mean thunderandlightening make you come here?? cry Shall I call 911, buddy??

Hi Mel !!
It's always good to hear from you.

I was going to attempt to reply with humor, but I'm wrestling with a problem at work, and humor is hard to come by today.

I hope you are doing well. You ought to be. Keep up the good work, OK?

God bless you, that you may continue to find Joy in the Journey.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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Originally Posted by ccbis
When the house sells I will find an apartment for myself and move! That will be a lot of work... that's why I'm enjoying the peace and quiet now.

Makes sense.
Moves can be difficult, but they can be exciting too.
Out with the old, and in with the new?
I have a hard time with change, but it is often good for me. How about you?


Originally Posted by ccbis
Anyway it will soon be over.

The end........ in a way.......... but the beginning in another.
You will be just fine, and I think you really do know that.


Originally Posted by ccbis
I remember how I felt at 20-21 years of age so I understand the girls. I try not to complain about the lack of help with chores because I know that soon they will have to manage on their own. And I will be free.

It was so exciting to begin my own life - I remember too.
What will you do with your freedom?
(Ah, still seeking, you ask so many questions.)




Originally Posted by ccbis
And then we will all have a different kind of relationship!

All things to look forward to.

At work nothing much is happening, but again, you never know. Next year is election year so there will soon be changes again.


How is your elderly friend?
I have been wondering about your work, but I hate to ask about every thing all the time.

You seem to have plenty to do, and as you said, you don't get lonely, or bored. I admire that in you.

We are doing another camping trip on a couple of weeks. To the mountains. If you are in the area, drop by and come with us.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
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