I'm in IT, so usually everyone is very easy to get along with, more screen time than face time. However, there is one personality that I have had conflict with, to the point that a coworker escalated it to the manager already. The manager said that he was going to sit me elsewhere on the floor, with other folks that do more similar work to me than this one person. But instead, other folks who also had a request in to move have been moved, but not me yet. We no longer work on the same projects, and when he does have a question for me, I answer quickly and to the point, and get out. I have a script memorized to use if he starts getting demeaning to me again.

This morning, he was bullying another coworker again. This is how it started last time, he started on othe folks who he knew would "take it", and then added me to that circle. I have a self-protection plan, but not a plan for this.

I see these options:

• A respectful Thoughtful Request that the aggressor speak respectfully to the others.
• Keep out of it, as I know the reciever will go to the manager when she is ready, as she has before.
• Tell the reciever that I see what is happening, and will back her up if she talks to the manager.
• Let the manager know directly that this is starting again
• Ask about the progress of my move.

Does anyone else run into folks like this at work? How do you handle it?

Toxic coworkers are the worst - especially bullies. Chances are, that bully is also bullying management anyway. I think you should do a combination of your suggestions, but be careful at the same time.

1. Talk to the receiver. Talk to other receivers as well. If there are enough of you, you might be able to work together to have the bully relocated rather than all of you.

2. Talk to your manager. Ask about the move AND inform him of the bullying at the same time. Of course this is easier to do if you know you have others on board. But you can do it anyway.

My work managed to get rid of a bully like this about a year or so ago. It was terrible for the longest time but eventually we got through to management. The guy was *this* close to a sexual harassment charge (he was the one who told all of us girls in the lunch room we deserve to be raped because we don't cover our heads - he's Muslim, none of us are).

E/O:

I thought this thread was about personalities at MB!

My bad.

LG

Tabby, that's what I'm leaning towards, letting the manager know and asking about my move. And speaking to the receiver to let her know that she's not the only one seeing this.

Also, I wish I was good with humor. I'd like to go up to them and say something like, "Hey, How about knocking it off already I'm trying to get some work done over here!" Like with a cheerful tome of voice. I wish I could think of a joke or something funny to go with that. Like, a respectful way to ask him to knock it off.

Since I posted, the agressor apologized to the other coworker. Another part of the cycle. This is like anthropology over here.

LG, I always get a lot out of your posts. Have you seen the latest LG commercials? "Life is Good" I think. I need some cooler initials, too

Anyhow, I thought it was relevant how on the board we've moved to a silent notification paradigm. If there's something that you've learned from the personalities at MB, I'm open to hear it.

Smile, speak quietly, look them directly in the eyes, while you tell him/ her to kindly go F them self.

Then turn your back...and walk away.

Who cares what they think?

Obviously this is a silly idea.

Inform management in writing and keep a log of your communications with the co-worker, peers and your boss. Take the concerns to HR as well.

Smile, speak quietly, look them directly in the eyes, while you tell him/ her to kindly go F them self.

SnD, I live outside Miami. People have baseball bats in their car under the driver's seat. I wouldn't want to have to watch my back in the parking lot leaving work every day. And I think I have a good sense of who to give a large amount of distance to.


Medc, I will consider going to HR. Your advice is a little ahead of where I am today. I look forward to when it will be easy for me to do things like that when they are necessary.

Living in fear of gang mentality. Different kettle of fish.
What has America come down to?
Really? It worked for me rather well. works on a global basis as well...perhaps America is different/backward...?
The interaction remains private. They have the choice to back off..but are made aware that the sh*t stops before it reaches me.
I would not put up with crap from anyone on the job site. The [censored] comments of another would be shoved down their throat the first time. I have a job to do. Putting up with their crap is not part of my job description.
That would appear to be the only option, if you are in fear of 'retribution'
The question was how would *I* handle it: I would tell them point blank.

IF: as it appears to be the case in Miami, people deal with each other with baseball bats. Get a can of Bear Mace.

Either way: Should he/they attack you. They get charged for Assault and Battery.

On another note: What a horrific way to live. That's the great USA? Never cared for the US when I was there years ago....and apparently it has become much worse.
He 'does it' because they LET HIM. Does anyone ever run interference when he starts his BS?

What's so special about this little reject?
He has a baseball bat? So what? ...you can too. Walk with friendly coworkers to your cars.