****edit****

He can't dictate what questions are going to be asked. It sounds as if he wants it worded just right so he can answer w/o lying and pass the test...which to me sounds like an admission of something right there. He's been getting angry at you as a way to manipulate you into backing off and control you so you don't keep pushing for the truth. What are you going to do if he fails the test?
BTW, Lie Detector Tests aren't infallible, I've known those who passed them that were lying and by the same token, some people flunk them that are being honest...that IS why they aren't admissible in court.

*****EDIT*****

Stellkat and introvert....

I don't know what the heck you are talking about re: BA. My life has been unbearable. I lost my only brother and sibling 1 year ago, my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's 4 months ago doesn't remember me and my marriage is a filled with lies. The only blood I have are my 2 children. So I don't think anything is very funny right now. I don't appreciate your joke at my expense. I debaded whether to post anything and thought maybe it would help me to get others opinions without my emotions getting involved because the family I grew up with is gone, but it seems like I'm the butt of your joke amd I don't think there is anything funny about it. I thought people were here to help not think my pain is funny.

I thought this was a forum where people try to help one another not put them down and make them feel lower then they already do.

heartbreak3,

Try to ignore some of the unkindness that is on this board these days.

There are some good people here that will give you a lot of help.

Good luck and God Bless.

Love in Christ,
Miss M

heartbreak3 needs HELP right now. heartbreak3 is NOT the poster known as "BA". Let the mods do their jobs please. Anyone who has something helpful to offer heartbreak3 is welcome and encouraged to do so.

The harrassment going on on this thread will STOP right now!

heartbreak3, I apologize for the interruption of your thread.

HB,

I am sorry to say this, but your husband has likely had a long term affair...and maybe more.

I will suggest something to you that is basically fool-proof and will get you the answers you need to make decisions about your life.

Ask your husband to submit to a polygraph exam. If he has nothing to hide, he should do this for you. Watch his reaction. Until you get to the bottom of things...until you get the truth....you will never have peace. You deserve it.

Schedule the test and do not cancel it. Make it a condition for him to remain married to you....and watch his reaction. He will most likely say he will take it...then he will give you small lies he has told as a way of bargaining his way out of the test. Don't fall for it. Go through with the test and by this time next week, you can have what he has denied you for 8 years... the truth.

If he says he will not take it...divorce him and NEVER look back.

Thank you Maverick and Miss M

Thank you for your reply medc.

I struggle between my emotions and logic and gut feelings. I'm constantly in battle within myself. I've tried forgetting and going on but it just doesn't work. He says things that are so contradicting in different aspects of our marriage. Too many triggers.

Please accept my apologies heartbreak3. I feel terrible for harrassing you. Unfortunately, your name is similar to one's used by a particularly annoying troll on this board.

heartbreak3,
I'm sorry, I know what you are going through although I didn't experience it that long. When they tell lies to us it makes us feel we are crazy and because we want to save the marriage we get so confused. It's good to step back and look at what is really going on and recognize when there are inconsistencies. The stuff they say to us is called "fog babble" and for a reason. It's important to not let him snow you, pay attention to the facts and your gut instinct. I hope you get the truth you deserve. It may not make you feel better but at least you'll know what you're dealing with and you'll know you haven't been crazy.

Sorry for my last post, heratbreak3.

It seems the forum has a troll in it's midst and some member's convinced me that you were him.

I'll stay out of the "BA" easter egg hunt from now on.

Medc is right.

But, whatever you do (like med says) DO NOT CANCEL THE POLY !!!!

KMS(W) was about 2 hours away from taking a poly...but I was convinced that I was wasting our time and money, because "who would take a poly with full knowledge that they are lying and about to spend $600 just to get caught?".....my lying WW, that's who.

I'm afraid that your H is most likely lying about his affair history and is most likely still having an affair.

Take care of yourself and follow med's advice.

hb3,

Glad to see you are getting some good advice.

I concur with the others in staying with the polygraph.

Considering the length of your WS's A, and all the lies that have been told over the years, a polygraph is a perfectly reasonable request.

Glad you are here, you will get lots of help, learn a lot, and get to a LOT healthier place than you have been all these years

No sense in :twobyfour: because of what you SHOULD have done all these years, you are here NOW. Study the website, the plans etc. MB has all the tools you need to learn the skills you need to have a healthy marriage.

People are here to support you.

Love in Christ,
Miss M

HD, BA, why not go out and get yourself a real life instead of playing with personalities for your own amusement, on a message board?

9 posts in 1/2 hour BA? Just trying to keep ahead of the Mods? Get a life man.

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Stellakat and Heavensdoor...

You base your truth on your assumptions. I'm sorry if you don't like what my posts say. You don't have to become rude and ignorant and angry. I came to this forum to get some clarity with my situation but for some reason you won't let me. I would appreciate you leaving me alone I have enough to deal with.

Heavensdoor is a troll that has caused some problems here and frequently posts under different names. Stella...the mods have confirmed this is NOT BA. Please refrain from attacking this poster further.

How are you doing today HB?