Hello everyone, well H and I are doing better. We have been to only 3 MC appointments but I've seen a difference in DH. He still thinks about the A but not every moment of the day anymore. I think H is finially on the road to healing and our M is on the road to recovery.
H job makes recovery alot harder but not impossible. H works LONG hours and has 24 hr duty every 4 days so when he comes home he is wore out and just wants to sleep so spending time together is very rare.

On a good note H gets a week off starting tuesday so we will be able to spend some time together until he starts back up again the following tuesday. Only 3 years of this and he'll go back to a normal work week with weekends off again.

I can finally see that light at the end of the tunnel, it still is far away but it's there.

I want to thank everyone that has given both me and my H advice since we have come to MB. Having others out there that have been through similar situations has help us realize that we can make it through this.