Thanks LilD.

I am going to start my Plan B letter. I think it will catch him completely off guard. But, I think it's time because if I don't I know I will lose any love that I have left for him.

I don't know what it is but lately I just feel like as long as him and her don't work out I will be ok. Even if he doesnt come back and we do get divorced...I just don't want him to be with her since she is the OW and had a lot to do with us separating in the first place. Everyone says these relationships dont last...I just wish someone could tell me how long.

BTW, I just found out that he got her name tattoo'd on him. Being in the military, he has other tattoos. I think this was his desperate attempt to "prove his love" to her since she knows he came back to me for a few days. I think he has officially lost it. My friends and family say not to worry because getting a name tattoo seems to jinx/curse relationships anyway. They also warned me that it's probably only a matter of time before he comes to me for money to get it removed or covered up...

No worries Shelly.

CVatching him off gaurd is a great thing to do. Forewarned is forearmed. Have you seen some of the examples on the forums? Post it on MB before sending it. Hopefully Marshmellow will come by, she is excellent at them.

As far as your feelings go, its all part of the rollercoster, and you will find the early days of PB really hard. But like everything it gets better with time. I hate that
As far as the relationships lasting the general stat they say here is 97% of all A's will break down within 2 years. Of the 3% that go on to marriage, 75% will end within 6 years. This means less than 1% of A's turn into long term relationships.

I've heard that comment about tattoo's. I don't know your WH's motivation, but it seems like a desperate attempt to prove something to me.
I hope her name is short so it doesnt take too much work to cover up. Mind you, speaking from experience, removal hurts way more than application.

I nearly forgot to ask the important stuff

Are you ready for PB? Do you have an intermedary set up. Have you thought about handover for child care? Do you have seperate finances sorted, are you protected from him financially, do you have some sort of LSA arranged?
Have you done a good enough Plan A? Will he be left with a last positive memory of you? Do you have a support network available to you, is your GP aware of what is going on should you need AD's, have you got PB activities planned out for YOU to help keep your mind off the situation and to help you be the you, you want to be?

Lil

Her name only has 4 letters so it shouldnt be too hard to cover up...lol.

I still have a lot of work to do before I can implement the Plan B. I have to make arrangements for the children, finances, still have to do the letter and the tough one...right now he wouldnt be left with a last positive memory of me so i have to find a way to correct that too.

Ah but think of the possibilities with the pain of removal dahling

Did you ever figure out what his top EN's are? If you could target the top one or two, that would be great.

Oh yes, I have. I would much rather make him have it removed than covered up.

For 2 reasons... a) the pain and b) even with a cover up, I'm afraid I'd still be able to make out her name when I look at it...ughhh

yep, for sure.

Did you find out his top EN's? Have you a plan for filling them so he has a good final memory of you?
How's the rest of plan B prep going?

Lil graduated at the top of her class It's great that she's helping you. Getting ready for Plan B is very important; be sure to take lil's advice, and make sure you know and meet his ENs and finish off a great Plan A.

Aw shucks Jayne

I've been kind of hoping someone else would come in and input, just to be sure its all good KWIM?
Anyway, you were one of my bestest advisors, you can help too

I've been reading, and couldn't improve on anything you said
I just popped in so y'all didn't feel lonely. I gotta go sleep now, carry on, I'll post if I can think of anything to add. But you're giving great advice. (to me too! *hug*)

Yeah, I've just had dinner and am just waiting for 7.30pm so I can go out to the shed and do the HAM net.
G'night and thanx, I feel better now