I just found out this past weekend that my wife of 7 years and mother to my 17 month old boy, has been involved in an affair. The affair was with MY used to be best friend. The affair started just over 2 years ago, and then stopped after she got pregnant with my son.

Then around 3 months ago she made another visit over there one more time...and thats when I found out. Now she is so upset and swears that it will never happen again and only wants to work on our marriage.

Of course I am pissed, but am willing to at least give it a try, but I need some advice for my most recent actions. I have taken her cell phone away, to keep unwanted texting, I have password protected the laptop, so that she has no access to e-mail and myspace. And she is not to leave this house without me. All this goes away once we start councelling. We both have just finished reading his needs/her needs and both feel confident that this can be fixed. Am I wrong to turn her into a prisoner in her own home?

I just cant trust her judgment at this point. And I need advice on the proper steps to take here

Thanks in advance for any help.

we have read the his need/her needs and feel that we can work things out....but I have set some rules to be followed.

Now i'm wondering if they are too harsh....I haved password proteccted the computer, her cell phone has been taken away to eleminate texting. am I a criminal forcing her to have to live like this until we get in to see the councellor?

From what you have written there is probably a good chance that your child may not be yours. You wrote she was having the affair up untill the time she got pregnant and then resumed it after the child was born. You need to get a paternity test as soon as possible. Since she continues in the affair then I think you need to contact an attorney just to understand your various legal options. I do not mean to be harsh but from what you have written it sounds like she has absolutely no respect for you and your marriage and is playing you for a fool. I wish you luck.

looking4acure

Run, do not walk to have a DNA test done.
Paternity issue must be found out to settle that issue in it's self.

When you get a keylogger installed you can let her back on the computer.

I understand you do not want WW out alone. Can she go shopping with her mom or sister.

When she leaves work she can call you on office phone so you know she was at work and what time she should be home.

Get her a GPS cell phone with real time GPS.

Do not worry if she uses her phone. How can she call you if her car was to break down. Don't even worry about her erasing her call log, as long as you get the phone bills you'll be able to verify NC with the OM.

So give her cell phone. If WW wants to break NC. She can use work phone. OM can give her a secret cell phone.

Just get her a new cell phone number. Also close all existing emails, then set up a new email name. These things will slow down OM's attempts to break NC. No more facebooks etc.

Exposure is a must have. As you can see your WW has not been able to stay away from OM. Without warning you must tell WW's parents and her siblings.

You must expose the OMW. Do not tell WW before you expose she will only try to talk you out of it to protect the OM.