Thanks for your generous offer, Queenie.

She lives in the house she and my dad shared. When she gets sick, I'm going up there to care for her. Hopefully we can finally meet.

I would absolutely love that.

Hopefully it will be a long time from now. Nothing personal.

We have a plan that when she gets sick, I will fly up there and care for her, just like I did for my dad. My dad was able to stay home until 3 days before he died. My mom wants the same.

I'm sorry to hear about your mother, B.

Your son and mine sound alike in ONE RESPECT.

He is saying that he doesn't want to marry his girlfriend UNTIL..and he has X,Y,Z and more... that he says he wants to have in place beforehand..

I've been thinking that she's NOT the ONE..cause wouldn't you think if he were "IN LOVE", he'd want to make that commitment and they could work on X,Y,Z TOGETHER..that's what I've been thinking about MY SON and saying to him..He doesn't seem to GET IT...

So maybe she's not THE ONE...and his GF knows this...

Just a thought....

B,

That is the most amazing gift you can give your mom. I did the same thing even though my family was put on hold.

I look forward to meeting you one day in the far distance, and would be honored if you let me help if you need it.

You give so much to everyone else. Let us give to you if you need it.

Queenie - I was very blessed to have good parents. It was an honor to take care of my dad. No regrets - he cared for me and I cared for him.

Hopefully my mom will have some more days. She took care of my dad for 3 years by herself. Dad died at then end of November and my mom got sick in January.

So I'm just trying to get through this, like you and the others.

We all do the very best we can, don't we.

I'm very grateful we have each other on here to go through things.

The most unlikely of friends.

I don't know how we would be unlikely friends. I think we are very much the same, like soulmates.

We are today, but had our H not cheated, do you think we would have ever met?

Kinda interesting to entertain that our paths might have crossed without this A crap.

Nope, we never would have met. I'm certain. But we did, and too bad for our husbands.

We come out the winners.

Yours knows he is the loser.

One day G-d willing mine will understand and try and come home.

:RollieEyes:

Your chat with each other is HEARTWARMING!!

This is for you as well.

Really when you think about it, how we have held each other up or offered support through this time, not just to survive, but to learn to grow is amazing.

We do it with love, care, concern and oh yes :twobyfour:

B & Queenie,


I am with Mimi.

Thanks for sharing!

This is, quite possibly, one of the sweetest and most kind things I've ever read on this site.

It doesn't make sense. She claims to need to be alone yet she is moving into a house where 4 people already live? A house that is farther away from work?
IMO this is her passive aggressive way of giving your DS an ultimatum. She doesn't want you to know because if her plan works out (he marries her) there will be tension between you. IMO she sounds very immature. How old is she and how long have they been dating?

The girlfriend is 10 years older than my son who is 25. At first I was kind of shocked, but she fits in so well. They do everything together.

Just giving it more time to see what happens.

B:

Her time clock is running out...

B-
Sorry your son is hurting. I'm afraid Mimi is right, her clock is running out. That is a fact at 35, not a manipulation. The age difference is pretty significant at this juncture of their lives. Not so bad at 35/45 but definately significant at 25/35 if you are not on the same page.

They are not married so don't judge. Sounds to me like she is a smart lady for knowing her own mind. If you are close to her, why don't you talk to her? You'd probably understand her better and be better able to help her. Don't judge her Believer. Let her go if she needs to. They are not married and I respect her for understanding her needs and knowing "when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em". Your son will be okay, he is sooooo young! She will not be able to give him the happiness he needs if they are not on the same page emotionally - no matter how "nice" they both are.

Growing pains. They hurt.

You have not talked back to me about it, B. But I'll keep talking to you since we seem to be SOMEWHAT in the same shoes.

My son's GF is only 5 years older than he is and he is your son's age. Although he cares for her, the age difference is an issue for HIM. She is more settled AND my son keeps telling me about her having experienced things in HISTORY that he has NOT. I'm not sure what "that boy" (my son) is talking about but...the AGE DIFFERENCE may be more of an issue than you think it is. Your son and his girl are considered a GENERATION apart in age with a 10 year difference.

I understand the hurt you must feel since you love her but I would think, like me, you would want your son to find "THE ONE".