I am so numb right now. I don't know whether to believe him.
I found some things on his former work email account. It was messages from him and OW, it wasn't much, but enough. I almost feel sorry for her as he really played her, she is a person he would never want a relationship with, just her type of attitude and weight (FWH doesn't like really thick people). Anyways I confronted him. And he started admitting 'the real truth'. He said it was more than 5 times(he first said it was 5 times and all at her place), he is not sure it could be around 10 put no more than that. I found out they had sex in OUR car twice, he took her to a hotel once overnight were they had sex twice. And then the other times was at her place(around 3/4times). He said they hadn't talked or seen each other since calling it off in July, he lied about that too, they chat online a few times and talked on the phone.
After this I just broke down and got in a really angry stage I never thought I could get that angry. He had tears in his eyes, but to me they were not good enough, I have seen them before.
I then told him when will he just tell me the truth and stop lieing. He then proceeding to say he has something else to say.
THEN THE MOST SHOCKING NEWS OF ALL........
He said she called him about 2 weeks ago saying they needed to talk, so what did he do, he went over and WHAT THE F DO YOU THINK HAPPENED. Yep, they did it again. He said he felt really bad and it had nothing to do w/ our sex life as it was fine at that point, it had to do with him and his selfishness. This is the first time since he said it ended in July(and 5 weeks after he confessed to me of his A) and that during that time he still wasn't sure about us (not sure what to believe, i guess was the fog).
He said it was just for sex, but that he did lead her on to the point where she believed he was getting a divorce and started falling for him. I saw another message from a next person that he also tried, by joking around asking 'when are u going to invite me over' the same time he was having an A with this one. But the other one had enough self-esteem and respect to not study him because he was a married man.
He went on to say that he hates who he has become(mind you this is not the husband I married and he has said so also)and he truly wants us to recover. He realizes that he wants his family, he at first was hoping I opt for a divorce(which he did tell me when he first confessed). I ask him how do I even know if I can trust him again, what would he say. He said that 'he would say I should trust him now as he has doesn't want to live like this' but knows that right now I wouldn't be able too.
He really did seem more sincere this time and I wouldn't have known about the last one unless he told me. He called her later that day infront of me and told her he is working things out with his wife and he doesn't want her to contact him, by phone, email or anything. I heard her on the other end just saying 'OK, OK, OK'. He also told me that they was suppose to meet up that SAME NIGHT but that he had already decided not to.
This morning he came and held me and said he just wants us to be close again. I am in tears now as I am numb. I don't know what to believe.
Lord just gave me peace
Last edited by ANewBeginning; 11/04/08 10:39 AM.