Yes and I'll bet dollars to doughnuts that you still haven't exposed at work because your still afraid she going to leave you.

She's planning trips to go to Spain, and yet you let her manipulate you.

Expose to work and re expose to OMW about their up coming trip to Spain.

If this marriage is over is because you can't find your ball's. Go buy some.

I suggest you go down to Wal Mart and go down the pharmacy aisle 2b, they come two to a can, their right next to the boxes of testosterone.

The divorce has not been granted by the judge.

Were not married, hes left his partner, my other half is now living at her mums for the time being. Shes told me she doesn't love me anymore and she can't see her ever being in love with me again. Shes left me for the om i'm pretty sure this is final, i can only hope that maybe she wakes up in a few weeks but i can't see that ever happening.
I'm sure a lot of you know how i feel right now, pretty sure im in shock, my emotions have shut down.

Your case is a classic case. She says she is done, blah, blah, blah. That is what they all say.

Hang in there.

Im pretty sure this is it,theres no way shes coming back, im devastated i cant put into words how upset/bad i feel theres so much hurt it wont come out all at once. I begged her to stay, she says thats it no more us. Weve been together for eleven years, apparently shes not been happy for years, our son seems to be taking it in his stride, ive told my parents, theyre upset but my mum has known for ages that something was wrong.
I cant contact the OW hes left her anyway, this has obviously been planned behind my back over the last couple of weeks so my insecurities were right.
I can't see me getting through this

"I begged her to stay"

You were told begging only turns off WW's?

You were told to expose them at work. Intead of being strong you were weak and just begged. It is over because you gave up. Instead of maning up.

It's not to late to expose. Just because you were told OM left OMW, does not mean it's true. Why can't you contact OMW?

Quit acting like a 10-year-old. People here - who have already been through what you are going through and FIXED IT - are telling you what to do. And you are ignoring every piece of advice. We tell you they ALL say that, and you ignore us. We tell you to expose and you ignore us.

Why did you come here?

We are telling you how to get your wife BACK and you ignore our advice.

Quit whining and do what we tell you. She's leaving anyway - why not do what we tell you to do and have a better chance that we know what we are talking about?

Well shes living at her mothers now, i'm trying to find out ow phone number to expose but i'm pretty sure hes left her anyway. I'm completely devastated my whole world has fallen apart ive got nothing. She tells me at the moment she doesnt think it will ever be right again, that its the best thing for both of us. Ive asked her wether she thinks she will feel different in the future, shes said she doesnt know but probably not.
I can't eat, sleep, think or seem to be able to function properly i'm in our house surrounded by everything thats ours (so many memories) its killing me completely, she seems to be getting on with her life.

This affair has been going on for more than a year, im pretty certain they love each other, do you think she will ever regret this ? Ive tried telling her the grass isnt greener etc but nothing i say is being heard. They've both got good jobs and plenty of money, my other half has told me she wants to sell the house and split the equity, says she wants to still be friends. How can someone you love so dearly be so cruel ?

Parsnip,
I can so relate to the feelings of hopelessness and despair. In fact, I have been doing better, but am in what I call "my dark place" even as I type -- but I know it is just a place I go from time to time because there is so much grief in these situations. Following a MB plan is your best best to have a guide to what otherwise will be actions driven solely by emotion. Listen to folks here, do what they suggest, and when you are low don't go to her. Come here and stay strong and supported.
This is the most difficult thing any of us will likely go through, so hang in there!
Bf439

Thanks man, it doesnt seem real, 10 weeks ago i had my woman my home my son and we were going on holiday. Im 31 years of age. Ive lost everything i can't describe the pain im in right now. Nothing ive ever experienced has ever felt this bad, even when a close friend of ours was murdered

I know, I know. I lost my dad 6 years ago and this loss is so much worse because its grief over and over and over again. You just have to talk to your support people, kkep posting and hang in there. You will recover, but your relationship may not but that will be a reflection on your partner -- not you.
BF439

Parsnip did you expose?
You must expose.

Its really over between us, shes told the rest of her family everything, ( ive spoken with them all now and they definately know)they've all said the usual were here for you etc i'm completely devastated, i've lost the will to live, if it wasn't for the fact i have an 8yr old son i wouldn't be here anymore. How can somebody you love so much the person you are closest to do this to you ?
The only people that don't know are the people she works with, i dont really know wether theres any point in telling someone there now, shes being reasonable and fair about our son and the house n money etc, i feel if i piss her off now she could probably screw me out of everything.
The sad thing is i'd still have her back, no matter how much your friends and family tell you i deserve better and its her loss.

You're young. You will find another woman who is worthy of your love and devotion. Shake this cheater from your shoes and move on. Your son deserves a happy father.

Don't take the pus sy way out with this hanging myself bullcr@p.

Man up for your sons sake. Don't let this POS OM become his father!

Thanks man, i know what i've got to do regarding my son n stuff, its just so hard feeling the way i do inside, i've never felt this hurt ever, and ive been to my fair share of family/friends funerals. I'm living in a house thats killing me because i need to keep my son here, its his home where his room is his friends etc im trying to keep it as normal as poss for his sake. Everything i look at is ours even stupid stuff like our plates n cups etc. I can't let them have it either so i'm staying wether it kills me or not.
My last 11 years of happy memories that i've cherished now cause me pain along with the fact that most of my future plans have been taken away from me.
I'm restraining myself from going and smashing this guys face in, incase i have a custody battle on my hands in the future, or if there is a chance of her coming home that would most definately spoil it.

PARSNIP!

Yes, those were flames...I'm trying to get your attention!

YOU MUST come out of your pity pot! Who is it helping? Not you, not your son, certainly not your future!

Get yourself some anti-depressants and come out of YOUR fog, man.

You are certainly justified in throwing in the towel, but it doesn't sound like that's what you really want to do.

You think you are powerless. "Right you are if you think you are."

If you crawl off, defeated and pitiful, you do indeed get the result you describe.

But if she's lost to you ALREADY, what more would you have to lose by fighting it like a man?

EXPOSE to her employer. EXPOSE to the OM's betrayed partner! The law will prevent your woman from taking everything else away from you. Don't worry about that now. It is a sorry excuse for not being courageous.

Think about this: Why would ANY woman want a man who wimpers, whines and begs? NOT the man she fell in love with, I'll wager.

Show your strength! And don't tell me you don't have any--you've just buried it under your (understandable) feelings. Showing your power by punching the OM would not be useful and you know it.

Do something harder than that. Expose. Only then will you be able to look yourself in the mirror, knowing you didn't wimp out, you fought for what you wanted most in life.

Be a good role model for your son. Fight for your principle.

"I'm restraining myself from going and smashing this guys face in"

Yeah the way you restraining yourself from exposing.

If you wanted to do something you would expose OM at work.

So much easier then punching someone, and documenting an affair will only help you in court when it comes time fight.

But you have shown that you do not want to fight. You just come here to cry. Crying, we don't want no stinkin' crying, we need you exposing.