How would you feel about your wife/husband/partner working with someone that they dated and lived with for 5 plus years.

Just looking for some feedback that I can pass on to a friend.

I personally would NOT get involved with someone that worked with an ex.

How long ago did it end? How did it end? How much contact have they had since, or will there be new excitement at this unexpected closeness? I don't think there's an elastic rule that applies to everything. I could work with several of my old boyfriends just fine. One, I would not want to try, since at 60 I'm too old to play with fire.

tl

No freaking way I would tolerate it.

I agree with Iam, no freaking way. The slope is slippery enough without adding 5 years of history to it.

Want2Stay

Not a good scenario .... one never knows when a flame will reignite. Who needs this potential drama.

I guess the "dated" part wouldn't cause me much problem, unless the "wife/husband/partner" had already cheated and they are in recovery from that event. Then, I'd say "no way, Jose!" Not being around potential sources of temptation is the ONLY way to go.

But the addition of the "lived with" part for 5+ years negates any consideration of any arrangement where the "live in" partner of 5+ years is anywhere "in the picture."

If, for no other reason, it is not a situation of Plan Of Joint Agreement, because it would make anyone at least "nervous" and "suspicious" along the lines of "out of sight, out of mind."

Additionally, it would be very disrespectful of a spouse/partner's feelings. Sometimes the consequences of past actions do "impact" our present day, but it makes no sense at all to CHOOSE to put that "past" anywhere near the "present."

Sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.

Sorry, I'm having trouble getting past the idea of working with someone I had lived with for 5 years but am currenlty not dating - as in we had broken up. I have never spent time with an X-anything before - the closest to this would be attending a funeral that an x-bf also attended. Isn't the purpose of breaking up so you don't have to see them again? If I met someone who was in that situation, I would assume that they aren't actually broken up, but perhaps having some difficulty or going through some kind of process and MMOB. In fact, I'd be uncomfortable working with that particular couple as a co-worker, let alone a potential date.

Lived together?

No way in hell.

Mmm...I'd have to go with the No Way In Heck response.

(and I feel compelled to add that I, too, went to a funeral where my exbf was there, but since he was in the casket, my H didn't mind so much)

Perhaps an unenumerated exception to the MB "NO CONTACT" caveat would be going to OP's funeral (presuming OP was single at the time of the affair).

Might give the BS solace to confirm the death.

I AM kiddin'

Mr. Wondering

Ditto.

And I am NOT kiddin'

"You had your chance...now rot and enjoy your new relationship."

We all have UNTIL death...and then the opportunity for true change ends.