My husband moved out of the house on Thrusday and while we were distant I had no idea we were on the verge of divorce. He has already spoken to an attorney and is finding comfort in an old friend. My husband and I have been together for 10 years. His friend has known him longer but she does this in and out of his life type thing.

My husband has admitted that before we dated they had feelings for one another. Needless to say this is the third time my husband and I have had an issue when she pops back into our lives. My husband always says that he does not love me never has and never will, comes back and claims everything is okay until she shows up again. I believe he is having an emotional affair with her. My husband has admitted to wanting to shift some of her traits onto me and making a wife that is the combination of the two of us.

I am going to do what I can as far as eliminating love busters and showing my love to try to strengthen our relationship. I am also working on making myself a better person. Problem is my husband is not admitting to the emotional affair and still insists on speaking with and seeing her. How do I cope with this?

I know that his relationship with her is bad for us and that if he continues to see her it will lead him further away. At the same time if I were to say you have to chose me or her, right now, he would chose her and our marraige would be over. I don't want to let the EA continue but I am not sure how to rectify the situation without making my marriage worse. My husband knows how I feel and says he cannot and will not cut her out of his life.

He is having an affair with her, and it's probably physical, despite what he says. You can't believe cheaters - they lie.

If you want him back, you will have to expose the affair to his family, her family, friends...anyone who will put pressure on them to stop the affair.