Imagine, I have thought about this and I don't know what I'd do in this situation.Maybe it would depend on how repentant he was?

DS18 came home today from WH'S.He forgot to ask WH about going to court but he doesn't think he did,says he thinks WH was in the shop all day??

DS18 is off to Plett for 10 days tomorrow with 4 friends.Its the place most school leavers go to for a good holiday! Local DJ's perform in the clubs and basically its one long party for the kids to celebrate the end of school.

Nice place (or it was when I was last there). Some beautiful houses there.

Did you see that house on the beachfront that looks like a castle ruin??? Weird.

OT: Do you guys get to enjoy end of year business functions?

Ja, I've seen that house...

Our lab are going to have dinner on a boat at the Waterfront while it cruises round the waterfront for 2 hours then docks and the party continues..what are you doing?.It should be fun.

I've been very good and have stayed completely dark...

DS16 left today to go to WH till Wednesday as its school holidays.

Hey, I missed that boat each time the opportunity came round. I heard that its fabulous. Watch out for choppy water though. Dinner, drinks and a rolling sea is bad music.

Our college did Amadeus at the Barnyard by Willowbridge (opp. Tygervalley centre). It is "rock theatre" - take your guys, some friends and a picnic hamper. Stunning show.

I shall HAVE to take DW along for the experience. I think I shall leave DS10 at his friends - he doesn't like loud noise.


Very good... especially in the new South Africa (little joke).

I've been having a good social life these last few days....
On Thursday a good gf invited me and 2 other gfs, for sundowners and snacks at her house.Her home has a deck which overlooks the sea...beautiful....we had lots of laughs,I couldn't help thinking that if WH was at home I wouldn't be having these social get- togethers with other gfs!!!

Last nite I went with my sis to see the new Bond movie and went for a bite to eat before hand.Our Herpatologist friend phoned me while we were out to say he had a 3 week job lined up in Feb/March...would DS18 like to go with and earn $400.00 I phoned DS18 and he was estatic to say the least....Imagine, its in Kimberly...

This morning I went to a charity breakfast for kids with Aids.You had to take a wrapped gift for a girl/boy aged 11-14, and a tin of food so hampers for families dealing with Aids,
could be made up.It was wonderful....

Now I'm at work doing the afternoon shift....

I can't help thinking how blessed I am and how God is walking right beside me through this....There are so many things that I have done these last 2 years that I wouldn't have done if WH was at home still.
I am growing within myself which is a positive....

Invite these guys to Mojolenas. I just learned about the place today. It's a sort of tent and it is parked in front of Artscape. The main meal ranges from R50-R120. Theatre included. They have been going 3 weeks. I haven't tried the food there yet, but the ambience is amazing.


Hope, this is what we have been dying to hear!

YES!!!!!!

As Mark and so many others remind us, be grateful for what we have... And let G-d lead us to where we are going.... and in time we will forget what we are missing.

You are doing incredible HOPE. I'm so proud of you and your courage to keep walking.

Thanks Imagine, I'll mention it to the girls....
Do you ever go to the Sunset concerts at Kirstenbosch? They've just started up again.We normally go to most of them.

Queenie,I'm trying my best this time to stay dark....so far so good.I'm just missing my boys....

All things considered,I have a good life right now.Emotionally I'm fine....just don't want the rollercoaster to take a dip!!!

Imagine, have you heard of Simons,at Groot Constantia.....they apparently have a singles night on Fridays? My friends all tell me its a nice place to meet people..I'm just not ready to go looking for dates.

Its midnight here so I'm off to bed......

We last went to the K gardens some months back. I forgot who was playing but we didn't stop to listen. DS10 is NOT a huge music fan.

I have strong musical roots but now am MWK. No regrets!

I forgot to mention that you can look up Mojolenas under Madame Zingara of South Africa on the web.


I've been to a posh restaurant at Groot Constantia many, many moons back but don't remember its name. Certainly looked nothing like the Simons restaurant on the net.

A single venue seems so terribly contrived. Why don't you just connect with a club. St James church at Kenilworth hosts some excellent hikes and social events if your own church is restricted.

I hope all the other guys are watching this post to note how interesting Cape Town is. I'm very proud of our town. Come and visit.

Sunday was the big Christmas light switch-on for Bothasig. This is my home patch. You probably know that this is a big deal for us each year. Thanks to theft and vandalism the house displays are becoming fewer and fewer.

Possibly this will improve as the month rolls on.


Was there a Sunset concert this weekend?

I suggest, when you are ready to date, that you just go out and live your life and do the things you love to do.

Singles things are so contrived.

It is much more likely you will meet someone while doing the regular stuff you like.

Here in California, we have concerts on the beach and in the parks. Turns out it is quite the venue for showing off. People bring picnic baskets, sushi, japanese food, Italian with many courses, a vase of flowers, a goldfish in a bowl, etc. It is lots of fun.

I love looking at all the homes lit up .I am a sucker for REAL christmas trees and all the trimmings that go with Christmas.Its so sad that theft in our country ruins such a special time in the year.

I think "freshly ground" was at Kirstenbosch last Sunday.I had to work so I missed them, although I have seen them live before.

DS16 is coming home tomorrow. I have been on my own since Thursday and although I'm busy on the weekends, I miss the boys terribly around the house during the week.

I've been staying dark and its become easier to do as the days go by....in the past I think I lasted 2 months before I broke NC.

Tomorrow I'm going to have to be strong when DS16 comes home and remind him not to tell me anything...I do feel guilty sometimes cos he off loads to me when OW's kids upset him.I don't like to hear this and it makes me angry with WH...

Am I being unfair to DS16 not letting him vent to me..or shall I listen to him?

Believer I don't see myself going to singles socials...if I meet someone, so be it but I'm not looking at all.

BTW, the 6th Dec was 2 years since Dday...I can't believe 2 years has passed.

When I think about this logically, there no way WH would change his mind now..for those who do recover after such a long time, it must be very hard.

I'm real proud of you... Keep it up and please post here if you feel tempted.


Tough question... It's really hard being a good parent hey?

Which would he prefer a sympathetic mom or a morose, depressed mom who is consumed by a stbxWH?


BTW. Did you come across any industrial action while commuting to work today?

No I didn't....did you?

I cancelled a consultation in Town at my missus recommendation.

Hope,

Christmas will be my 2 year Dday, and I can't believe it either. And yes, I do think it would be nearly impossible at this point to R.

I'm right there with you....

Hope and Chai,

Is this because YOU don't recovery or because you are thinking about it from WH's side?

If the latter, stop that.... :twobyfour:

We DON'T KNOW what is happening on the other side....

I agree with Queenie. I also don't like the idea of keeping track of these horrible anniversaries. They are no more than triggers into depression.

Christmas is a depressing time for the lonely. Please make plans for spending time with those that you love, not those that are lost (or mislaid)

Thanks guys for the support....

Queenie, I just love you to bits....today I'm feeling way down(its 10h30 here)and reading your post lifted me a lot...
I think its cos WH's family are arriving next week and I envision them all having a happy time together....although WH will have to be in the shop all day!

Imagine,I agree with you...I didn't feel any sadder on the 6th,it just reminded me of how long this has been going on.