Hi friends,
I have not been around in a while. My divorce is almost 6 years in the past, and my youngest child is a senior in high school. The other 2 are in college. Unbelievable!

I met a wonderful gentleman a while back. He helped me change my tire, and I found him to be so refreshingly sweet, warm and funny.
I am almost 50, and he is 64. What are your opinions on this age difference? We have really hit it off....
Thanks in advance...
KK

I have some neighbors across the street. The woman's 50ish and the man is 60ish. I think they are like 12 years apart. They've been together for 13 years I think. If they wouldn't have told me their ages I would have never known they were that far apart.

Unless you're into hip hop and he's into big band, What's the problem?

Betrayed Cajun,
I am a Cajun also!
Thanks for posting. I don't see a problem with the age difference. I just think that my friends and parents might have a problem with it. I do want to get married again, and I don't see dating this guy for just a fun time, know what I mean?
Thanks!
KK

I just think that my friends and parents might have a problem with it.

They need to respect you enough to let you live your own life. If the two of you make each other happy, that should be enough for family and friends.....

For a first marriage, and early in life. 17 years is too much of an age difference. Still something to consider at 49.

Have you dated much since your divorce?

I also need to mention that my next door neighbor is 38 and his wife is 51. So I have a set of neighbors 13 years apart and another 14 years apart. All have been together for many years and have had no issues with family and friends.

Maybe it's because I'm 33, but I hear about a 50 and 64 year old couple and it doesn't even register to me that their ages are far apart.

ALTHOUGH, I did just tell you my 51 year old neighbor has a 38 year old husband. I'm sure you wouldn't mind being in that position either, LOL!

Thank you for your comments. RMW....I believe you are right, that my family and friends should respect my decisions. I am just one always wants everybody's approval!

The Road: I am almost 50, and he is 63, so I guess it is only 13 years difference. Yes, I dated quite a bit, especially the first 3 years after my divorce. Lately, not so much.

Cajun, that is pretty cool about your 2 sets of neighbors, especially the one where the guy is younger. I'm just thinking down the road when he would be 73, and I would be 60.?.? Something to think about, I guess. Will let you all know how things go.

Thanks for your thoughts!
KK

How did you knock a year off of him and still add a year onto you.

63-50=13 year difference.

I think that you have some problem, some nagging doubt in the back of you mind. Because you found a way to reduce the age difference by making him a year younger, and you keep making yourself 50 when your 49.

64-49=15 year difference.

There are old 64's and young 64's, same is said for 49's.

It's not just age that has to be looked at. I sense you are here looking for approval. It shows that you are not sure of yourself.

If you were 20 and he was 35 I would say you need a check up from the neck up.

You are now 49. A 15 year age difference is not as critical. But still must be strongly factored in.

If you were 60 and he was 75. One's health is more important then one's age. Example, he came from a family where everyone in his family lived til 99 for generations, or they all passed on before 69.

You seem to have doubts. Just as a BS does. We tell them your gut is always right.

Dear Mr. Road,
Thank you for your reply. I found out he is 63 instead of 64....I will be 50 in 2 months, so.....it's not that I reduced it...
Yes, I do understand the ramifications of the older age...It is just my nature to want to seek approval from others. I will just have to play it by ear. It could just be a very nice friendship. I am on match.com now, and also am in touch with a college friend who is single, so it is nice to know that there are other options.
Thanks for your concern.
KK

Hey Kay - so how is it going ? Did you decide to date this man? Did your family have issues? What happened?

Agree with Road on health. I used to do strenuous hiking trips with a 73 year old man. This year, he got malaria in March. It's December now and I believe his health will never fully recover. He doesn't hike anymore and walking for two hours on slow pace will render him out of breath. It's just harder for older people to spring back to health. And someone older I met on match asked me what I thought of taking care of an ailing partner.

The age issue is an interesting one. For me the initial problem was attraction, I just wasn't attracted to men significantly older than me. But the other day I found myself attracted to a man I believe is 15 years or more older than I am. This surprised me and I projected forward and wondered if I would have a problem caring for an ailing partner. I honestly don't know the answer to that. It might depend on his health now and how prepared he is for the future.

At this point I'm not looking. I have my profile on one site because they have given me free membership that has lasted for almost two years. If something comes of that fine, but otherwise I'm concentrating on my boys, school (just finished my last academic semester) and student teach in the spring :-) and pottery.

kk2002, I am dating a wonderful woman who is 36. I am 55. We have been dating for a year now. It is not the age difference that is a problem. It is the stage of life difference that is problematic. She is still powering up in some ways, and I am beginning to power down. I imagine at your ages the stage of life difference is less significant. Go for it.