ITA. In Texas, one can go through the Attorney General's office to get this done. I'm not sure how it's done in LA though... you guys have some strange laws on the books.

Hi Rin

Queenie asked me to check in with your thread-sounds like you have a lot going on at once. Isn't that the way it always happens?

I'm glad that you've got your lawyer's office on the whole CS thing. As far as I know, everything goes through POWS's SS# so if he applies for unemployment-it catches him there. And the 401K thing will be harder for him than the motorcycles because it has to go through the plan administrator and through his SS#. Once again-no way to sneak that one past anybody.

I also was reading about your OS's struggles and the school stuff. If you want, send me an email. That's my daily work world-teaching kids with all that, and helping their parents figure out how to get what they (kid and parent) need from the school.

Hang in there-you are doing great!

morning JT, i'm going 2 email you what i finished up yesterday and got out 2 the appropriate ppl.

Queen, thx for getting JT here, i haven't heard from her for a while!

PM, you said alot with "we got screwy laws here"...I mean they did let BC continue 2 live here with the Santa thing that one year, it was crazy! And the reindeer! WOW!!!!

I couldn't help it. Rudolph's nose was so bright, I was hypnotized I tell ya!!

BC...love ya man! Hope things are going well on your end!

OKAY...I got a call from the School's Superintentent this morning as a result of the letters that were hand delivered to school personel yesterday! We can not reverse the day that OS missed but he will be allowed to make up any work that was missed!

Also, he said that there does appear to be a history and that my son needs help so he said that he would be handing this over to the Special Education person, who also got a letter from me, and it appears that we are going to be moving in the right direction with OS. HE even called the principle and SHE admitted that it's not that OS doesn't do his work but there DOES appear to be a problem.

I feel like my voice has been heard and I'm hoping and praying that THIS helps OS. We can get some things going in the right direction.

My friend who helped me with all of his is a child advocate and she's just so happy as well as I am. I know that this is going to be a long process. WEll, they have 60 days by law to have him tested.

LMAO...I just got a call from the principle...she is gathering the information that I requested and I have to be at the school tomorrow morning! I am so thrilled for OS! The principle admitted after reviewing his records that he has been on the decline and needs some help!

GOOOOO RINDIVA!!! I fight a great fight when I have the tools to fight with!

JT, OMG, THANK YOU! I talked to OS this morning and he said that he often gets headaches when reading and that's why he puts his head down and then ends up falling asleep.

Poor Cha' asked me this morning if it was his fault that he gets bad grades. I told him that part of it was his fault for not doing what he was suppose to be doing but I was going to fight for him and we were going to figure this out!

He's happy today! I ahve to be at the school for 10am to go over the test that he took yesterday. I'm also going to call the eye doctor today and see about getting an appt.

On another note, POWS txtd me at 1:30 this morning...I didn't get it until I woke up! Said: HopeI don't wake you but I can't sleep to much on my mind. Just wanted to say thanks for listening the other night!

Of course, I didn't reply and will not...my plate's full with OS and other stuff...I can't "play" with him right now...OS is the most important thing...getting him squared away...I can help OS but I can't POWS!

Hey Rin-

I enjoyed talking with you and helping you find ways to help your OS. Just knowing he has you in his corner to help him figure all this stuff out will make a huge difference.

As far as the "bad grades" stuff, let him know that some of the smartest people in history were not "good" students the way that the education system measures things.

Einstein did not speak until he was 4-years-old and did not read until he was 7. His parents thought he was "sub-normal," and one of his teachers described him as "mentally slow, unsociable, and adrift forever in foolish dreams." He was expelled from school and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic School.

Thomas Edison teachers said he was "too stupid to learn anything." He was fired from his first two jobs for being "non-productive."

Let me know how things went at school today

http://www.houmatoday.com/article/2...ld_be_suspended_after_tussle_with_lawyer

I'm feeling pretty burnt out today! please read this article on my lawyer...Community proeprty court date is set for March 4th...

What happens to his cases?

Uhh.. I dunno Rin.. is there another attorney in his practice that could take over for him?

The way that article reads.. you've definitely got yourself a bulldog.. but for something as straightforward as what you're looking at.. wouldn't another attorney be able to handle it?

Which one is your attorney?

If it's the one that faces suspension by the State Bar, what they usually do is require him to notify his clients to give them an opportunity to find other counsel. If there is a retainer involved, he may be required to refund the unused portion. I imagine that there will also be a continuance granted on your case if requested.

Mine is the one facing suspension!

This could also be the reason why he hasn't asked me for any more money that what I paid upfront!

I really need to call!

Well, I have decided that I will be at the District Attorney's office in the next few days...if I can I will be there tomorrow or Monday or Tuesday...I know that this is a bad time of the year to be doing this but it has to be done!

AND I just got confirmation tonight that POWS was fired from his job for missing so much time! To top it off, I talked to him tonight after I got off of work...he was coming out of the woods! He's six hours away...and he had to buy a hunting license to go hunting but he can't pay his child support!

Well...

Louisiana Child Support Enforcement Measures
If a non-custodial parent does not pay child support, he or she is subject to enforcement measures by the State of Louisiana to collect regular and past-due payments.

Being included on Louisiana’s Delinquent Payors list, a publicly-available list of individuals who are under a legal obligation to pay child support, yet have not made a payment in the last six months.

Withholding of income (wages, employment bonuses, Workers’ Compensation benefits, unemployment benefits, etc.)

Reporting delinquent parents to credit report bureaus.

Driver’s, professional, and hunting and fishing licenses may be suspended or denied.

Passport applications may be denied by the U.S. State Department.

Interception of a parent's federal and state income tax refunds, state or property tax credits, and state lottery winnings.

Liens may be filed against any real property or other assets.

A lawsuit may be filed against the non-custodial parent asking the court to enforce its order. The court may find a parent in contempt of court and possibly impose a jail sentence.


I think with the lawyer thing, that I'm just going to let the state fight my battle for me!

I am being nice and letting POWS keep the kids for extra time go that they can go see their grandparent's.

I'm tired and I need someone else to fight my battles for me...the state will do a good job and I don't ahve to attend to the cr@ppy lawyer that I have...

LAdies and Gentleman we have found the ask to OS's school problems! The eye doctor DID find a problem with his eyes! When he tried to read and write they turn a too far in...like he's trying to cross his eyes...

He said that this is the reason for the behavior, not wanting to do the work...I have to THANK JT FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART FOR THIS ONE!!!!! You have saved my child and I am forever grateful! We have to go back for more tests but first they lowered his prescription on his glasses and wants to wait until the new glasses come in. THen, we are going to do more tests to see if there's something else going on. Since OS is color deficient also, the dr. would like to do some color testing on his also.

I have also included this article for others who are interested....JT said that alot of people don't know about this and they usually hear about it through word of mouth from one parent to the other! I would have never known to test his vision for focus and tracking...he didn't really mention anything about his eyes hurting, burning...and once I found out about this I started questioning him...after reading for about 10 minutes the words started bunching up...sometimes he would start seeing double and had headaches often...basically the eye muscles need to be strenghten.

http://www.add-adhd.org/attention_deficit_disorder.html

It's like a wait has been lifted! And I'm still following through with all of the other testing too, just to be safe. OS has had these behaviors for a long time, I'm sure that it will take some time to correct. The dr. will also give recommendation to the school to help OS out!

I keep wanting to tear up, I guess out of JOY and relief! I ahve MB to thank for this too!

Queen, thank YOU for getting her here! JT, you are amazing, wonderful and YOU WILL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART!

Hello, I've had some major down time this weekend and I have been loving it...no POWS, no kids, no friends except some calls and it's been great...thing is I haven't had any down time like this in awhile and it was uncomfortable at first but it's gotten better...

I'm finishing up cooking my turkey for tomorrow potluck at work...I've gotten to church twice today...the Christmas play was at 6 tonight and it was absoletly wonderful...I didn't remember when the last time I've been to something like that...

POWS is trying to widge his way into being here Christmas day to watch the boys open their presents...last year we were spending alot of time together and I think that's what he's really looking for BUT I CAN'T HAVE IT...

This year I am standing firm and not being nice to him like I have been in the past...it's not my fault that he has no place to go and no family to spend it with...a result of his poor choices...besides anytime around him and I start wishing I hadn't talked to him...normally becasue I don't want to be around someone who lies SOOOO much...

It's been a long process in putting my foot down but I know that I'm getting better every day...little by little...THIS year I am almost comfortable with being by myself...I ahve been focusing this year on the true meaning and how grateful I am for all of the positive changes that has happened since I left...it's been helping for the most part...

Hey Rin,

You just sound so much strong and stronger each time you post. Focused, more easily able to identify your needs and boundaries and making sure you are taking care of yourself.

How proud you must be of your growth and recovery..

LOL...no and yes...it's been a long hard road and I have failed many times...had to deal with bad feelings for my choices and have struggled alot...

In my mind I fall, get back up and fall again...it's the learning process that's been so hard...

I'm helping out on another thread and have been reading the beginning and it's been difficult...I've actually been thinking lot about the mistakes I ahve made in dealing with POWS...then I read another thread about a WONDERFULLY AMAZING GODDESS AND DATING and how strong she is and I'm not there...

I have been wondering if I will get to that point...I think it's a combination of the threads that have me in this self doubt mode but it makes me want better...

I'm really tired and need to go to bed...H.A.L.T.

I'm trying to take care of myself...I ahven't been eating like I should becasue I don't feel like it...I've been struggling with a few things but like I said in my earlier post, I'm trying to focus on the true meaning of xmas!

Well, I'm off to bed!

Thank you for the wonderful support...you are really awesome!

Miss Rin!!

Hey girl! To quote Mimi,
and how does that go, Queenie,
You sound like you are doubting how Fabulous you are!!


I have such admiration for you. Yes, as you say, you do well - then fall down,,,,,,and then get back up. The point being is that you get back up!!! We all have done it, and continue to do it. The amazing thing is that each time we get back up, we do so with greater strength than we ever imagined we had.

I know that this time of year is very difficult for most all of us. It also gets hard sometimes with reading where others are in their sitch. Yet, each story here is a gift of sorts for me. It gives me a chance to help, but mostly to learn. I continue to learn from so many here, no matter where they are in this journey we never wanted to take.

Look at those beautiful boys you have and remember what strength and grace you have shown them in the way you have dealt with what you have gone through!! You are a Goddess! Don't forget that!!

Rin

Thanks Bugs, it's been really hard staying out of that dark place right now!

I'd throw myself a party but I can't really afford it right now! LOL...

After a long bath, I'm feeling better than I was earlier today...it's just gloomy right now for me...

POWS and I got into it via txt yesterday...he wrote to ask about the list that the boys had for Christmas and I figured it was a good time to tell him that I've have to pass on him being here to watch the boys open there gifts here...used the excuse that we needed to get to my family's house for dinner...he had talked about dropping them off earlier than noon, which I thought was the correct time for me to get them back...

I was in town and didn't have my paperwork to look at...well, he refused to bring them back at the time that I thought it was...I'm still not sure if he's going to bring them back for 2...he got pretty mad, txting me back to back...said that I would have to meet him half way...that I never helped him when he needs something but he always helps me...complete BS...I let him have the boys two extra days so that they could see their grandparents, plus it helped me out with child care costs...

He said so much, and my reply was that his problems were not my problems anymore and it was his choice to go five hours from here to see his parents...

I basically told him that if he didn't have the kids back on time that I would file a report...he told me to get out my pen and start writing...I told him that I was talking about called the police...he said then call...so as soon as I got in the door I called a friend to talk it out and grabbed my paperwork...behold, I screwed up and it is 2pm...

So, I wrote back that "I was very wrong, it is 2, and I was sorry!"

I've been doing a lot of kicking myself, becasue I know what the papers say and he's the one that doesn't or pretends not too...I have to know it so that he doesn't try anything and I screwed this one up...

I'm really kicking myself...I was already in a funky mood and now it's a little worse...partly becasue I was expecting them at noon and now I know it's 2...so they will miss my family thing and I'm going to have to work up myself to even go without them...MOF, I have no plans to go tomorrow night, instead I'm going to a friend's house...

This has been a really crappy Christmas...POWS loses his job, I lose my bonus to bills becasue of that...alright...I'm stopping there, nothing good will come of that...

Positive things: I have money to pay my bills, the boys will have a good Christmas, I'm alive, I have my health, I was able to get a beautiful HEMI prior to Christmas (consider myself lucky for Christmas there!), I have a house...

Looking at the positive is what has been keeping me sane right now...it's just been really hard...

So, I'm hoping that he will return the kids for 2 Christmas day...I think he started the whole thing because I told him that I didn't want him to be with us...he lost that right a long time ago and I'm trying to break away from him more and more...stay in my little Plan B corner...so he tries to push me, intimidate me into doing what he wants and I'd rather be without the kids until 2 then allow him to control me like that...

I've been tired of the threats and intimidation for so long...I hate that I was wrong about the time but in a way I'm proud that I have drawn that line in the sand saying IF YOU DO THIS I WILL DO THIS...and should he cross that line, it's following through for me...otherwise it will always be the same with him...

He even told me that if I called the police that I would have to explain that to the kids, I replied that I didn't have a problem with that...So, he was trying to guilt me too...

Standing up to him for ME has been the hardest things about all of this...I don't want it to be this way, I mean who wants to call the cops on the man that you loved, that you have kids with...who wants to be in that position, seriously?

I'm doing the best that I can and I'm trying hard to not kick myself for things right now and just do the best that I can...but it's hard...I haven't wanted to get out of bed, I'm not eating like I should and it appears that everyone thinks that I have lost some weight...which I guess I have according to the scale and my clothes are a little loose...but I don't eat becasue I don't feel like it or I'm just not hungry...

I thinks it's the holidays and then after stepping down as Director so many things being thrown at me with OS, my lawyer's possible suspension, the IRS catching up with me on claiming the kids from last year (for those of you who don't remember, my paralegal after being asked numerous times said that I could claim the kids every time I asked since he was so far behing on CS, then come to find out I had to get a court order to do it) and POWS losing his job. Not to mention, a court date in March for community property.

So I have a huge bolder to climb, and I keep telling myself that this too shall pass! What happen to me? Dec. 4th I touched lives speaking at graduation and here lately I'm face down in the dirt!

i feel a little better venting...

Look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again. Wisely improve the present. It is thine. Go forth to meet the shadowy future, without fear. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow(1807 - 1882)

Some wise person quoted that on her thread, hmmmm.

What you're facing now is NOTHING compared to where you've been. That boulder is just really a piece of broken rock. You've survived worse. You'll survive this. How can you go wrong when you got folks like us to help you through it?

What more can I say but you are right...

I'm trucking along...I'm mad becasue he is still affecting our lives...I'm lonely without the kids...there's alot that I need to deal with right now...

It's hard but like you said I've dealt with worst...it just feels bad right now...

no better place to be... :happyholidays: