I am emotionally exhausted.. Life is so unfair. I may be loosing a baby or even my life, will know more tomorrow (could be a dead fetus or a very big ovarian cyst). They said my stress level may have something to do with that, I can't sleep at night and I sit around and cry (he is at home, online, but he doesn't know).<BR>We talked. My H was extremely rational and cold, all he could think about was how my situation may effect him, he said how everything is going to be fine, he will take care of our children (IF I died! I'm 38). I want them to be fine, but?...! <BR>I didn't say anything, what can you say to something like that. Inside, I get so sad I'm numb. I'm not going to get any emotional support from him. After our 'supportive talk' he went online, exchanging jokes, writing emails.<BR>He tells me that his activities are none of my business and he'll spend his time with whoever he wants to spend it with. If given <BR>a choice between me or his online friends, I lose. We don't do anything together anymore, or talk to each other (only a year ago we could not stop talking, now he spends all his <BR>time online). He even forgot my last birthday (after 15 years of marriage), but was sending a birthday card to his online woman friend (of 6 months). And now this. I feel like I'm past my breaking point...<P>Anyway, thanks for listening. <P>

I am so sorry that you are going through this. As you can see there are a lot of broken hearts here. I hate that I see a new name in here everyday. Take a deep breath and realize that you have to be there for your kids.. you have to be the strong when your H is in his fantasy life. It hurts having to be the only thing that makes sense in all of this but right now, be your own friend and let time help make it through everyday!

To be sick on top of all of this, really is hard. <P>Unfortunately, when your spouse is having an affair online or face to face, emotional or a one night stand, they are so far in la la land that they usually aren't capable of being supportive. <P>15 years is such a long time. Don't give up. I'm sure when this is all said and done he will be kicking himself in the rear. <P>Let us know how tomorrow goes.<P>God Bless,<BR>tnt<P>

I will pray for you, your health, and your marriage.<BR>Lesa<P>------------------<BR>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net

numb--I am so, so sorry. I will say a prayer for you tonight. Hang in there!<BR>Kathi

Welcome <B>numb</B>...<P>I am so sorry all of this is happening to you...<BR>You have my prayers... <P>I have a post of general welcome post I wish to share with you... <P>It has a lot of quick links to many of the <B>most</B> important MB sites...<BR>Click here ==> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000002.html" TARGET=_blank>General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)</A><P>For some clarity... a short time ago the "main" forum was divided into 4 separate "sub" forums...<BR>Staying in the <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/cgi-bin/cgiwrap/marriage/forumdisplay.cgi?action=topics&forum=General+Questions&number=28&DaysPrune=10&LastLogin=" TARGET=_blank>General Questions</A> forum will give you the most responses! <P>A site to check out is...<A HREF="http://www.survivingloss.com/" TARGET=_blank>Surviving Loss</A>... <P>The stress and strain you must be under is enormous...<BR>...have you considered seeing a doctor?...<BR>...perhaps anti-depressant medication could be prescribed?<P>You must start thinking of you...<BR>...without you... your marriage can't even start to be saved.<P>Again... many prayers... <BR>...know that you are not alone!<P>Jim