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#2180534 02/08/00 01:56 AM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 413
K
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K Offline
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 413
I found out in December my H was still in contact with OW. I know he has also met her at the airport on her way to business trips. (She lives about 800 miles from us). Anyway, 2 weekends ago, my H wanted an overnight "getaway" for himself. I know he has been feeling depressed and I wanted him to have some time to think. Little did I know that he met the OW at the airport and they spent the night together on her way to somewhere else. She took an earlier flight for this. I know now they had been planning this for several weeks. I told him I could no longer live this way. He moved out and is staying with his parents. He doesn't know if he wants a divorce or not...and frankly I feel unable to make a decision right now. Are we now in plan B? What does that entail? The whole plan A thing didn't work at all because he just continued to keep in touch with her. I don't want a divorce, but my self-esteem is beginning to plummet. Here I am, trying to deal with 3 kids while he's trying to "find himself". It all seems so hopeless at this point.

#2180535 02/07/00 02:17 PM
Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 2,347
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I have to run back to work...I will respond tonight...<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

#2180536 02/07/00 02:48 PM
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 433
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Posts: 433
K7,<BR>On a previous thread you wondered where are NSR's? NSR is the resident welcomer at the MB forum. His welcome information can be found in the "Just Found Out" board. It will provide some good links to topics related to your situation on the web site.<P>You also mention on another post that your H is willing to look at the MB site with you. GREAT! It says that there is an interest in working on your relationship. <P>I am sorry about your pain. The good news is that if you are both willing to work on things with a healthy relationship in mind, you will move forward and be successful. The key is to realize that it takes effort, time and commitment.<P>Re: Your Plan B question -<P>Have you read the Plan A, Plan B stuff on the site? If not you can find the info at <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html</A> <P>In the end, you may end up with a far healthier relationship than either of you ever thought possible.<P>Good Luck, <BR>Lisa<P>

#2180537 02/07/00 04:53 PM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 413
K
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K Offline
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 413
I know you're right..it might be better. I have just had lots of personal tragedy lately and I am feeling pretty low. My father has quit speaking to me and my sister because my stepmom doesn't like us very much. My grandmother died a couple of weeks ago. My mother has moved out of state and my H had an affair. It's almost too much. Thank God for Prozac and Buspar!!! I am trying as best as I can to be positive. I wonder if plan B will work? My gut feeling tells me it gives H too much time to get in touch with the OW.


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