Hi All
Well first I want to thank this site for getting me through a dark period of my life when I found out my wife was cheating on me and I had to make a decision to move on.
I have been divorced for over a month now, I was seperated for 10 months.

So I am single, alone and wanting to know how soon is soon to start dating again?

I have been eating lunch with a co worker, we only meet at work, we seldom talk over the weekend just a little text msg here and there telling each other how the day is going, I met her mom and brothers and ate at her house for the holidays, she has yet to tell her mother about me because my ex had been calling her house casuing problems when she thought I was interested in her, she lives with her mother by the way.

She is 14 years my junior and it has been rough, am I rebounding?
We had great sex, until I wanted more, it was great she just wanted a casual hookup, I couldnt do it for some reason and uttered those three words.. I love you.

Which she replied back, and since then it has been a rollercoaster romance, so I found myself saying mean and hurtful things to her, I tried to break it off because it wasnt a relationship to which I wanted, she wants children and to be married and someone into church, I do not want anynore children
and not wanting to get married again.

She didnt want to break it off, she wanted to continue with it.
Pitiful man I am ... should I know better?
What am I doing now ?
And so I agreed each time, so here I am, feeling alone with someone, am I looking for this person to heal and mend me?
My ex-wife continues to call and text me, I tell her please dont contact me anymore and move on with her life and leave me alone after all the hurt and lies she has caused me, she continues to hold on to her innocense, dont matter anymore.

So here I am, dating a younger woman who only wantes to hook up at work and not after or the weekends, whom we dont communicate or talk enough to get an idea of who we are.
Deep inside beneath all the fear, I have an idea of what to do.
But having the courage to do it, well thats something else entirely different.

I came here because this place has helped me in the past greatly
The words and advice stung, but so does antiseptic on a cut.
Happy New Year

You can't be in ANY relationship until you've healed yourself. You clearly have not done that yet. Be fair to her and to yourself and back away and take care of you for a while.

People need at least year from the date of their divorce to heal and be ready to date.