Update on my story and new things happening. Some of you have probably read my post on my husband running around with my friend, and how he up and left, blah blah.

We are legally seperated. Over the past two weeks, I have had a friend of his, (well both our friend), send me texts, has called here and there and been over twice. He has told me he has always liked me. I was taken back by this, and while I'm flattered that he likes me, I'm still not sure how to take it with all that is going on right now.

A part of me feels its highly possible he is doing this on the be half of my husband, just to see what I would do. Then there is another part of me that maybe feels he is genuine in what he is saying. My kids know him and really like him, they know him as mom and dads friend, and he is. I went to high school with him actually.

My husband is out doing whatever he wants, his choice of course,and now this friend of ours has stepped into my life a little more than before, and wants to go out this weekend. I like him but I don't know what to do or think right now.

Would it be best to not go have dinner with him? Is that moving fast? I don't want to move fast..but at the same time I don't want to sit at home all the time while my husband is out doing whatever. Is it wrong of me to feel this way? I'm confused, and advice is appreciated!

DANGER, DANGER...WARNING, DANGER!

First, find out what you really want to do with your marriage and husband. Do you want to work on the marriage? Look deep inside and think about it for a while.

My advice is to remove yourself from the HS friend until you are sure what you want to do with marriage. Affairs start with simple statements like "I've always liked you" and "let's just have dinner." This "friend" will be meeting your ENs and you will develop feelings for him the more you are around him.

And don't be surprised if your WH put this guy up to it. I know that sounds evil and crazy, but people in the FOG have been known to do crazy things. I wouldn't put it past a WH to send someone to your doorstep...that would make your WHs affair easier for him. And how would you feel if this new guy dumped you the day after a divorce was final???!!!

Repeat, DANGER! Proceed with caution! Find out what you want from marriage first, before entering into another relationship.

'Legally separated' = 'still married'

You're right. I do need to think about things more. As far as saving the marriage, this has been going for awhile now..and I'm pretty much at the point to where I do NOT want too.

I know in my heart I need to be by myself right now and work on ME. Its just he kind of stepped in all of a sudden, not that he wasn't there before since he was our friend, but still, it caught me off guard.

I will decline on dinner with him. I'll tell him thank you but no thank you.

[quote=Vittoria]'Legally separated' = 'still married'



Yes, I'm aware. I was just making at statement about how we were now legally seperated, for those who didn't know for sure if we were.

I would say that it is not fair to yourself nor the HS friend to start something with everything else that is going on. Kindly explain to him that there is too much happening right now and you do not want to add to the chaos. Thank him.

From all that I have read, it seems like 2 years after divorce is finalized is a good time to start dating again. I have no experience with this, but have read alot about it. More experienced people will show up that have been through it and can explain it better than I.

I understand and I'm not ready at all to get back out there yet. I have no clue why I had even considered going out to dinner. I called and left him a message to call me, so I'll tell him when he calls back.