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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 571
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OP
Member
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 571 |
I don't know why I can't see my last post when clicking on it titled "what is your take on my situation"
BUT What a difference a day can make…
A guy friend called me out of the blue to ask me out for coffee. We really had a good time. We were friends for about 2 years. He was interested in me at one time but I made it perfectly clear to him I wasn’t interested in more than friends so he asked my friend out. They dated about 7 months. They broke up about 1 ½ years ago. I haven’t talked to her in 3 years. If I were to date him, should I call her out of respect to let her know? Is it possible for me to be attracted to him if at one time I was not at all interested? He is a super sweet guy. I think for me it is a maturity thing. What I was looking for back then was some sort of bam chemistry plus I was interested in a guy who was clearly not interested in me. Now I’m looking for integrity and Godliness. We are going out again in 2 weeks when our kids are with our exes. We have both been divorced for 6 years.
So I ask again… what is your take on my situation?
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 1,171
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Member
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 1,171 |
If you haven't talked to your friend in 3 years, why would you need to tell her?
You are both non-married people, what is the downside of going out to get some coffee?
The situation is fine...you just have to ask yourself as you go along if this man is meeting your ENs.
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,345
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Member
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,345 |
Sure, go out for cofee, what's the harm  . But my personal opinion on your question below is "no", if you were not attracted to him before, you won't be now. At least not for the longterm. AGG Is it possible for me to be attracted to him if at one time I was not at all interested?
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Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 15
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 15 |
I think you should go out and have a good time with the guy. See how things go. There is definitely no harm in what you are doing.
Since you haven't talked to your friend in such a long time and they broke up over a year ago, I don't see a need for you to contact her. That might do more harm than good. You aren't doing anything wrong by dating him if he's single.
As for your question, I think it is possible to be attracted to someone now that perhaps you weren't attracted to before. As we grow, we tend to change and become more mature. Thus, maybe what you didn't find attractive then, you might now. You also said that at the time you were interested in someone else. So maybe you didn't look at him as a "possible boyfriend". Take it slow, get to know him again. Give the guy a chance. He might be the one you missed out on. Best of luck to you!
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