My 46 yr old WW is living in a dream world where no one exists other than the OM who is going to solve all her problems .Pur children ,her older children, her family , my family ,our friends -they all mean nothing .She moved out Dec 1st ,affair began Aug 1st ,D-Day Nov 1st. I keep waiting for the happy fog to lift but no such luck .She has open access to the OM when our kids(6 and 13) are not with her .I cannot control that .We have shared and equal custody .I have exposed the A to everyone I can.I have expressed my digust with her adultery and my support of her if she desires to return. I have told her that forgivness is possible on my part. I have told her that I realize that part of the reason for the affair was my unknowling inability to support her emotionally in a time of need but also her inability to express her needs . Where do I go from here. Hurry up and wait I guess.

PS-I have a previous thread under Just Found out

It is now time to move on .I love my wife .I would do anything for her but , she has chosen to live life with another man .I have done all I can to ensure she gets help with her present depsressive mental state .I am continuing to provide my sons a safe ,stable and reliable home when they are with me . I must consider my marriage null and void. If and when she decides to turn back in my direction I will be there whether or not it is sjut as a friend .I can no longer go on beating myself up waiting for her to "crack" and wake up from this delusion she is living. I must move on . I am not giving up I am moving on !!!!!!!!!!

I too am in the same situation. Husband moved out for the second time into a house back in October. Says the typical our marriage means nothing, doesn't love me anymore, etc. Even started playing "family" with the OW and her kids and my son. Let's add insult to injury for me. This has been going on for almost a year now. He moved out for four months into a hotel first time, now in a house. I came to realize I really have NO control over him and even what he does with my son. I also have come to realize that no matter what path I choose, it will be equally painful. So, I continue to remain positive and do what it takes to keep things "good" between us. From what I have gathered in my extensive research is that these kinds of affairs and situations can take months sometime a couple of years. Will I wait that long, probably not, but right now this is the path I have chosen. The fog will lift when THEY are good and ready and not a minute before, no thing, person or memory will convince them. I call him the defient teenager and me as the parent can only watch their destruction. Best of luck, this path is not for the weak of heart.

Rod,

I've advised you before. If you don't believe me, then read Mortarman's story. He got his wife back.

But he played hard ball.

He filed for full custody of his children and really put a ton of effort into getting negative info about his wife and her affair.

He used it in full force in court. He got custody of his kids, which is when the fog started lifting for his WW. There were finally consequences to her affair.

You haven't made her face any consequences.

Cut off all contact with her and file for full custody of your kids on the grounds of abandonment if she's left your marital home or on the ground of mental instability.

But hardcore responses get men their wives back.

Men who take action to end the affair and make life miserable for the OM get their wives back.

Have you talked to him? Have you looked in to an AOA lawsuit?

Make your WW face consequences. That's the only real way to lift her fog.