Well he called again today and I told him I knew how often he was talking to her and texting and he admitted to ea, he says he didn't think that was what it was but he agreed when I explain the fog he was in and how he started talking to her about the same time he decided I wasn't what he wanted.
The wierd thing is she lives in Canada and we live in California and they haven't seen each other in 25 years.
She is also married and he promised to cut contact and see how he feels.
He wrote her as text this morning telling her it was over and so far no more contact, I can look up his cell usage online.
He called a couple of times today for silly reasons and came by to get a few things, but I stayed in the house and refused to see him.
I look like [censored], no sleep or food in 3 days.
He says he can't be happy with me, but if he could how would I feel.

Hi BrownEyes-

Just a quick suggestion-if you keep your information on one thread, then it is easier for others to follow.

This is typical behavior of a WS. He is trying to make you happy so you will meet some of his needs. Also, he wants to keep the door open to the possibility of keeping things going with her.

You need to go back and read the advice that others have given you. Dr. Harley's principles work to do a couple of things. First, by exposing the A to everyone who can put pressure on it, the fantasy around the A crumbles, and the secrecy which helps it grow is torn away.

Second, the Plan A/Plan B gives your WH a taste of what your M could be like (Plan A) and then Plan B gives him a taste of what life without you meeting his needs or being there for him at all will be like. Also Plan B can help you protect whatever love you still have for him and also keeps you from further pain.

Please read up about these. Please go back and read the advice of others. If you can, get the book "Surviving an Affair." You can get it from this website, at Amazon.com or a local Christian book store.

Finally, go to the doctor and tell him or her what's going on. They may prescribe some anti-anxiety medications. I was on a low dose AD for a while and it took a couple of weeks, but it helped. You might also need some sleep-aids for right now. You need to be able to function for your kids and for yourself.

Again, it would help everyone if you keep everything on one thread. There is a way to change your thread title-but I don't know how to do that. Someone else may chime in with that bit of info.

Hi Browneyes,

Welcome to MB. I'm sure you have heard this, but it's the best place you can be under the circumstances. I had a chance earlier to see Johnstwin working with you. She and so many others saved my life literally.

I didn't think I would survive. But enough about me.

To change your thread name, I would email one of the moderators and ask them for help. They have always been so gracious and kind in helping me say on my thread what was on my heart and what I wanted to call it.

I'll go read your other thread for more information.