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Its kinda hard to really look like your living a huge life. A-hem Is he due to see the kids around the 9th of march? Well actually his B-day is March 11! You're right I'll be having guests from New Zealand!
Me-39 H-38/Married 19years/DD18 & DS10 Dday EA/PA 4/23/08 Left home 5/08/08 Moved in w/Sea Hag 08/01/08 Read SAA Sept 08 Plan A 10/03/08 thru 11/15/08 Plan B 11/15/08-currently 01/18/09 Plan B crack w/phone call restating PBL 01/31/09 Planned brief contact 02/15/09 Delivery of Planned 2nd PBL Filed for D Dec 2009 Recovering well!
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Its kinda hard to really look like your living a huge life. A-hem Is he due to see the kids around the 9th of march? Ok so what do y'all think. Lildoggie is coming to see me in March. H knows that I have no friends or acquaintances in New Zealand. The kids know i have friends from there coming in March. DS10 doesn't know how i know them but DD17 knows I met her here. So they actually could talk about them coming. this could look like I have a life LOLOLOLOL what a sad comment LOL It would drive him crazy to know how the heck I have friends there and why they are staying with me. What about that?
Me-39 H-38/Married 19years/DD18 & DS10 Dday EA/PA 4/23/08 Left home 5/08/08 Moved in w/Sea Hag 08/01/08 Read SAA Sept 08 Plan A 10/03/08 thru 11/15/08 Plan B 11/15/08-currently 01/18/09 Plan B crack w/phone call restating PBL 01/31/09 Planned brief contact 02/15/09 Delivery of Planned 2nd PBL Filed for D Dec 2009 Recovering well!
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Blowup dolls? I am SO out of my league!
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner. ~ English proverb Neak's Story
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There was a BW who did this, and I think she posted on recovery. Maybe Pep will remember. Anyway, it was a wonderful story, and she was a good writer.
When hubby came to see the kids, she was all dressed up, and out the door she went. Actually, as I recall, she went to the library and read books, or WalMart for a coke. I've been trying to remember her name all day long... was it something like Carol??? She never actually DID anything untoward - but- she allowed her WH's imagination to run amok- it was brilliant. She worked with a marriage coach - who would call her or text her... In other words - she eventually tweaked his imagination so much that HE started to pursue HER (because he sensed she was no longer hanging around waiting for him to return)- and for awhile she was way too busy to be any more than briefly polite with WH before she had to "rush off" to make an "appointment with a friend". I live close enough - we could go out on a "date" sometime Also - some cool gifts might make their way into DS10's hot little hands (unusual stuff , like a TV show baseball cap )
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I know you really can't use an underwear model, but that thought cheered me up all day with that visual.
Ok another idea, remember the original "home alone"? How when the kid knew the robbers were casing the house and he set up a "fake party"? Well you could set up the same type thing when H comes to pick up the kids, people passing in front of the windows, loud music, laughter. That should get his attention. lol just another random thought
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years D17, D30 alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08 Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also) H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08 Plan B 1/09 D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Well lots to think about I am loving what the other BS did and I think there may be some way I can duplicate that. I can't wait to see What DS10 gets to see Today DS10 went to his 1st swim class and then in the evening he went to the jui jitsu class. He had a great time with both. Hard thing is they are both on the same days. One in the morning and one in the evening. So H called 3 times today since he FORGOT to call DS10 on Sunday and Monday...how you forget is beyond me. Now I guess he's in make up mode. 2 times DS10 didn't want to make the time to answer, not my fault. I asked him if he wanted to answer he said no. So he talked to DD17 for about 20 minutes. She told him about DS10's swim class and jui jitsu class and other small talk. Originally I had told DD17 not to tell dad about my friends from NEw Zealand coming but then I thought well he should know that I am still living so I told both of them that my friends(LILdoggie and Flick) are coming in March and they will be staying for a few days. They are looking forward to it, especially when I said they are bringing you candy from over there. DD17 mentioned it to her dad and he was like well who is it? What are they doing? Are they staying at the house? I think his brain is twisted. He has no idea who I know in New Zealand. LOLOLOL Too bad I would love for him to meet them to, and all my IM's. Anyways off ta bed, pooped all this running around... today.
Me-39 H-38/Married 19years/DD18 & DS10 Dday EA/PA 4/23/08 Left home 5/08/08 Moved in w/Sea Hag 08/01/08 Read SAA Sept 08 Plan A 10/03/08 thru 11/15/08 Plan B 11/15/08-currently 01/18/09 Plan B crack w/phone call restating PBL 01/31/09 Planned brief contact 02/15/09 Delivery of Planned 2nd PBL Filed for D Dec 2009 Recovering well!
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There was a BW who did this, and I think she posted on recovery. Maybe Pep will remember. Anyway, it was a wonderful story, and she was a good writer.
When hubby came to see the kids, she was all dressed up, and out the door she went. Actually, as I recall, she went to the library and read books, or WalMart for a coke. I've been trying to remember her name all day long... was it something like Carol??? She never actually DID anything untoward - but- she allowed her WH's imagination to run amok- it was brilliant. She worked with a marriage coach - who would call her or text her... \ Was it CarolKH? here
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Blowup dolls? I am SO out of my league! Oh dear Lord! I just spewed orange soda on my keyboard.
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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Yes! That is the thread. It makes great reading. Thanks, Melody.
I know that T2L is in Plan B, but many of the ideas are doable.
I remember buying nice lingerie and hanging it on the back of the bathroom door. My ex noticed it and wanted to know why I bought new lingerie - LOL.
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Oh yes I remember reading her thread! Cool, check out this part: He says he is calling from my house. I say I am parked along the side of the road taking the call (I was). He says he is going to go to EA's house and finish it with her. I tell him he does not have to do that...everyone needs friends. He says he has to do it, because he does not ever want me to worry about her. I say, whatever, but I am not telling you what to do (he said before that I am too controlling...actually he is just passive-aggressive and they all think the spouse is controlling even tho we might not be!) So we hang up. Any of that sound familiar??? ----Oh BTW, I know underwear models prolly wear real clothes out in public, but every time someone mentioned hiring an underwear model to be seen with walking down the street, I pictured them IN their underwear!
me - 47 H - 39 married 2001 DS 8a DS 8b :crosseyedcrazy: (Why is DS7b now a blockhead???) (Ack! Now he's not even a blockhead, just a word! That's no fun!)
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Oh BTW, I know underwear models prolly wear real clothes out in public, but every time someone mentioned hiring an underwear model to be seen with walking down the street, I pictured them IN their underwear! It is only when we start picturing them without their undies that we will all be in trouble. teehee.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years D17, D30 alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08 Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also) H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08 Plan B 1/09 D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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My H completely lost it when he thought I was dating. I looked great when I was dropping our daughter off at his apartment on his birthday. He noticed I looked good and that I was in a good mood and then I answered my phone and he heard me saying what time I would be meeting the person on the phone. He asked where I was going and I said to meet someone for a drink. He got really mad and told me that he couldn't believe I was dating already. I told him "are you crazy you started dating before you walked out on me". He told me to leave so I kissed my daughter good bye and left. He called me and we argued on the phone. Then about an hour later he called me repeatedly (like 15 times) and I didn't answer my phone. He then called me using our daughters cell phone which he knew I could not ignore. I answered and he told me he loved me and wanted to go to marriage counseling. The next day when I went to pick up our daughter he was crying and told me how sorry he was and how much he loved me. We have been in recovery ever since.
I've told this story before on here and gotten blasted for it, but it was a real turning point for my H.
BW 38 (me) FWH 42 Married 7 years DD 6 SD 15 11-2006 H said he wanted a divorce and walked out 3-2007 I told H I wanted him back 3-2007 to 4-2007 D-day's 4-2007 H moved back in for good Today-In recovery, but a long way to recovered
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I have been reading Carol old thread. Absolutely amazing. After 15 months she reconciled her M. I like her last resort techniques. Take the time and read this.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years D17, D30 alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08 Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also) H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08 Plan B 1/09 D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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I mean, you could put an inflatable boyfriend in the passenger seat... as WH pulls up-- you drive off. You can "wave" his inflatable arm at him, even <squeek, squeek> ...I think your WH is so foggy, he won't notice a thing wrong! LMAO Okay only if he's a HOT Blow up guy!!!!! I am picturing Trying2live as Eliane the Stewardess from the movie "Airplane!" sitting next to the "Automatic Pilot"
Me BH 49 WXW 50 Married 1998 DS 2002 DD 2005 D Day 1 7/28/08 D Day 2 8/19/08
Divorce Final 3/19/2009
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That's HER!!! The bit where she had a slinky dress and suitcase in the car for her WH to see was classic.
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That's HER!!! The bit where she had a slinky dress and suitcase in the car for her WH to see was classic. Thanks Melody gonna start reading that this morning. Here's my problem tho. How can I do that if he is never hear. I had been having the DD17 take her and DS10 to meet him somewhere else. Should I have him meet them here too and just happen to walk out in a hot dress while they are leaving too? Cuz I can to that ya know and then stay gone til night time. Otherwise he will never see or hear too much. I did however tell the kids that I know someone(Hee hee hee ) who works for the movie studios that scouts for locations and wants me to send some pictures of the house. That is a true story BTW. But I am sure his little brain would start turning. Yesterday he found out I am having visitors from New Zealand and now filming movies LOLOLOLOLOLOL He would probably wonder where the heck is she meeting all these people. I think I may take an overnight trip with a girlfriend next month if I can swing it. We'll see....
Me-39 H-38/Married 19years/DD18 & DS10 Dday EA/PA 4/23/08 Left home 5/08/08 Moved in w/Sea Hag 08/01/08 Read SAA Sept 08 Plan A 10/03/08 thru 11/15/08 Plan B 11/15/08-currently 01/18/09 Plan B crack w/phone call restating PBL 01/31/09 Planned brief contact 02/15/09 Delivery of Planned 2nd PBL Filed for D Dec 2009 Recovering well!
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Hey T2L, you can really blow his mind and tell H you are leaving for Texas for a weekend. He will be stratching his head saying WTH, who does she know there???
I have been reading Carol sitch, it really is something.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years D17, D30 alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08 Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also) H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08 Plan B 1/09 D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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Thanks Melody gonna start reading that this morning. Here's my problem tho. How can I do that if he is never hear. I had been having the DD17 take her and DS10 to meet him somewhere else. Should I have him meet them here too and just happen to walk out in a hot dress while they are leaving too? Cuz I can to that ya know and then stay gone til night time. Otherwise he will never see or hear too much. I did however tell the kids that I know someone(Hee hee hee ) who works for the movie studios that scouts for locations and wants me to send some pictures of the house. That is a true story BTW. But I am sure his little brain would start turning. Yesterday he found out I am having visitors from New Zealand and now filming movies LOLOLOLOLOLOL He would probably wonder where the heck is she meeting all these people. I think I may take an overnight trip with a girlfriend next month if I can swing it. We'll see.... Well - your faithful IM crew is still brainstorming - but one thing if for sure - we agree to tighten the thumbscrews of WH's PERCEPTION. It's the perception that matters. Plan to follow very soon.
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