SSS,

Though I haven't posted, I like everyone else around here has followed you and GM's progress. I have to say, I admire how you are handling things. It speaks volumes of your character....This place can be of great help, joy, sorrow and healing all rolled into one. You will forever be greatful you found it....

That being said, I noticed on Marks Rambling's thread how you spoke about finding other good posts and past advice from the great VETS who have walked these roads before us. I too looked for all that I could and took great solace in many older threads and posting.....

Some of the best stuff is in "Pep's Notable Posts" thread. Though some of the links do not work because of some "upgrading" last spring, there is still a lot of good stuff in there.

I also notice some people telling you about the VETS helping you out...and you do have some of the best. There are others who are no longer around and some who are only here intermittantly.....Schoolbus, Bramblerose, Starfish, K, are some of those.

I am going to include in this post a link to some of the threads and posts that really touched me, especially early on in my journey. You can bookmark these yourself by clicking on "My stuff" at the top of the page. That way you will have it all there for when you have the time to go back and read them......

Anyway, you will get used to it all and I wish you and GM all kinds of love and hope through this God-awful journey......


not2fun

Marks Rant for Newbies

Inside the Wayward Mind

Mulan, on boundaries

be the lighthouse....a thread for those feeling tossed in the waves

Betrayed spouses....JUST BE STILL

Betrayed Spouse! It is the Fear

When does the fog roll in...read FH'S response

Pep's Notable Posts Thread


There are many many more, but I hope this helps you......


not2fun

I messed up on a couple there, sorry. I am NOT a tech savvie person.....I will try to come back later on today and fix it, but this should help get ya started.....


For everyone else, ESPECIALLY Mark,,,,,,,isn't it about dang time I APPLIED these techie thingies you have told me to do????.....


not2fun

While tears don't always come easy for me I find them coming now. Thank you so much. You have no idea, or certainly you do, how much this means to me.

Everyone here knows what this is like but they have put up with my whining and complaining and gently urged me forward in one way or another. This post from you comes at a critical time for me, for us. It helps me to pull myself back up and get back to work.

I was just at my end point, the lowest, when I decided to look on the Internet for help. I looked at lots of places but bookmarked this one because I thought it looked good. Little did I know I had found what I needed. Now it is home. When GM found it on his own as well I was stunned.

not2fun...what a perfect name. I have read your posts, know your name well. You are right, everyone and every post has something to take into your head and then your heart to work with and grow.

I am bookmarking this thread, it not only contains good threads to read but it contains encouragement and care from you. I hope to pass something like this along in the future and I will site this thread and you for your beacon of hope. It may sound overly sweet but I mean every word of it. Thank you. (((not2fun)))

I have read both of your sitches but don't think I've posted to either of you so I'm glad you started this thread, Not2Fun. (I've been here for 2 years but barely posted all of last year.)

SSS, I have laughed and cried with you....cried for obvious reasons and laughed at Mike's sense of humor. You are an amazing woman and I'm sure you have already inspired many to begin taking baby steps towards recovery. I pray that you will be successful as you deserve the peace and joy you are seeking.

I don't think it was by chance that GM 'happened' to find this site almost simultaneously with you. If you ever need additional motivation to keep going, realize that the fact that your WS is posting (especially that he is motivated ON HIS OWN) is a privilege that many of us BS's would love to have (but for a myriad of reasons we don't). Even if GM pauses in his posting (or possibly quits for a season), the words he reads (and HAS read) here will be like seeds, developing and expanding gradually.

This journey (M recovery after massive infidelity) has no guarantees but with both of you investing, seeking help, taking new risks together, and being open to listening and learning, you enhance your chances of success. Thanks for being here.

Wishing you the Best!

Ace

Count me in as a HUGE SSS fan too! As I told GM, SSS, your warm, winning personality shines through even on a message board! Just leaps right off the page...AMAZING! I'm rooting for you SSS...You are a goodie, and no matter what happens, there is one thing I know...YOU are gonna be A-Okay!



Mrs. W

Oh! :MrEEk:

Another FAN Club.

Can I join too?



Hang in there Triple-S...

Mark

Ace, you are an Ace!

We will certainly keep trying and you are right, he is invested and here to learn to work the program and I am very lucky in that regard.

Thank you.

You are too kind.

I am in awe of each of you for your insight and your willingness to share your knowledge of something so shattering and painful.

Thanks for rooting! It is wonderful to know there are others in your corner .

GM agrees that you are indeed wonderful.

Thank you.

Wooo Hooo!

*snort* You are as funny as you are smart and sharing and I really appreciate you.

Hanging tight.

Thank you.

Mark funny?!!???....

He tells FISH stories for goodness sake.....them not funny stories.......


not2fun

ps...Mark actually is a good guy. He helped me when I SHAMELESSLY called him out on someone's else's thread BEGGING HIM TO help me....those little posts do nothing for me....I like the long-winded wordy stuff...... .....yes, I have no shame......

Nope Ace,

Never met you "personally" BUT your reputation proceeds ya.......

Just trying my dangedest to make it on your "Success" thread.........

It has been my goal for some time now.....


not2fun

Great goal to have, Not.

Two thoughts: You can, will be, and ARE a success whether your marriage succeeds or not. Believer is one of the best examples of this.

Also, if you want, encourage those who seem to be recoverED to share their success stories on that (not my) thread. I asked if a forum or thread with success stories existed when I first got here and was told "no", so I suggested that one be created. I was told that the forums had been reformatted a few years prior to that (early 2007) and would not be changing soon.

When a couple newbies bemoaned that there only seemed to be sad stories of misery and woe, I asked Princessmeggy if she would be willing to combine the chapters of her amazing success story she first called Not the MB Way (but later changed it to Shoulda Been the MB Way). When it seemed like few saw it on the OT forum, I asked and she agreed to help me start a collection of stories on GQII. That's how/why the first Success Stories thread was started in Sept. 2007.

Last month, T2L posted that she was frustrated that most of the links to the Success Stories thread were not working (maybe they're fixed now...I haven't checked) but when Atruheart posted her inspiring update that Friday (and gave me permission to copy it on the SS thread), I decided NOT to put it on the frustrating thread but started SUCCESS STORIES 2 that weekend.

Hopefully it will inspire many but I'm curious how many know it's even here. I was going to start it on the Recovery forum where it wouldn't slide so quickly, but it's so slow over there that I decided to post it on the GQII forum and ask any returning former posters for permission to include their stories.

Sadsosad...just curious, did YOU know there was a thread (actually 2 threads) of Success Stories on GQII? The links to both are in my sig line as I'm still hoping that those whose stories are included there will copy and paste their story from the old to new SS2 thread (or give me permission to do so.)

***** Not, you said you liked long-winded wordiness...right?******

Actually, I meant to post the following to you and hit the wrong post's "Quote" button (but decided to go with it anyway). Here's what I originally meant to say:


You shamelessly called him out and I ruthlessly stalked him, trying to get him to help me want to want to go fishing with my H when I first got here. At the time, I hated fishing, plus it represented triggers (he called OW often from his little boat when he was alone fishing). I had hoped Mark would give me a little list of reasons to change my attitude and 'reclaim' those triggers that fishing represented.

I was surprised but happy when he started the Fishing Thread (have you read it?) on the Recreation forum (linked to his sig line) and it has tremendous insights on marriage/fishing and fun (as well as funny to me) stories.

So there's my true confession, Not...... you can blame my stalking him for the Fishing thread being created. (Nah....I know I'm not that powerful...Mark chose to post it all on his own!)

Both of you (SSS and Not and many others) are already successes. What you've experienced and shared so far has most likely inspired people you may never know, lurkers and posters alike. Hopefully the SS2 thread will do the same.

Again, thanks for this thread, Not. Hope the links above stay intact for SSS/GM and others.

Ace

Thank you, too SSS.

How freaky is that, SSS....we just simul-posted! Twice! YIKES!

Happy Friday! Wish I didn't have to work today!

Ace

P.S. If ya ever need a break, join us on the 20-90 Friends [i]thread AKA the Vacation Thread[/i] on the Recovery forum. Everyone is welcome...we watched Mark and his friends invisible fishing yesterday LOL. :crosseyedcrazy:

Acey is telling you only part of the interesting stuff from yesterday's vacation postings.....we were all thrilled to be watching invisible ice-fishing -- everything was a bit fuzzy due to the blizzard.

Ace,

We sound like two 4 yrs. olds saying "ME ME ME....ITS MY TURN....ME ME ME"........

Like I said you reputation proceeds you, so yeah, I did know the story how you "stalked" him...... .....

For me, it was that I was so new here and loved all the threads and posts Mark had made. He was especially involved in TMTS story at the time (BTW....is his story on your success thread???...if not, I'll get him to get it there.....) and posted some long-winded but great advice every time. I called them "Marks Books"...... .

Eventually, he dragged himself over to see what he had to offer and stayed as part of my "team". It was good he came, because while I did an AMAZING Plan A, I did make many mistakes. And when I did that, I had Mimi (who was/is a TREMENDOUS mentor) giving my due 2x4, which were much shorter in length, but could be DANG scorching, and then I had Marks longer and more soothing 2x4's......they made a great team for me.....they were each other's ying and yang for me during all of that.......


And yeah, I've read all of Marks threads, even the fishing ones......which THANK GOD my H is not a fisherman (maybe a fisher of women.....) so I never had to worry about taking up THAT RC........


I also read your first Success thread back in the day....before MB Plan B'ed us and all the links were still good.......(in case you didn't know, I've been here over a year now......)

Anyway, back to the stalking,,,,,,good thing that these A's take our esteem down a notch or two so that we aren't too proud to BEG when needed.....

not2fun

ps....I am also familiar with your story....I can so RELATED when you tell us how part of you was glad Mr. R was having an A, because now YOU had a reason to get out.....I had THOUGHT that was what I would feel for months prior to actually finding out.....funny how what we think what we WILL do differs from what we ACTUALLY do......