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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 31
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OP
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 31 |
My WW is trying to set me up on a date with her friend. Has anything like this ever happened? Is this some sort of deep down guilt thing? I told her the whole idea was crazy but she didn't quit until her friend agreed with me that it was crazy. Just when I had her figuered out she does something to suprise me.
BS (ME) 30
WW 27
Started plan A Nov 1st 08
D-Day Nov. 18 08
Still trying to hang on!
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 546
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 546 |
My WW keeps trying to tell me it is ok for me to go out and stuff with other girls right now. If you start cheating it probably eases their guilt.
BH-me 32
WW-27
Married 5 yrs. together for 8
D2
D7
D-Day:11/10
EA for a week went PA and WW immediately left home leaving everything behind.
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 642
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 642 |
for goodness sakes don't do it! Sounds like you already dismissed the idea out of hand anyway.
This accomplishes a lot for your WW:
1. Eases her guilt
2. You are "just as bad" as she is
3. Legitimizes her A
4. Takes the moral high ground away from you
5. You lose any and all credibility with family, friends etc.
I am glad you saw this for what it is, a sick manipulation by your WW.
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 31
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OP
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 31 |
The best part is this is one of her best friends. My WW must of told her HORRIBLE things about me after she left me now she is trying to set her up with me? That just makes her look bad. Well at least my WW is talking to me again.
BS (ME) 30
WW 27
Started plan A Nov 1st 08
D-Day Nov. 18 08
Still trying to hang on!
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 3,278
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Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 3,278 |
Forget about the easing guilt for the WS, bringing you down to their level, etc.
You wanna know, really?
It gets you out of the way.
That's what they want.
Bottom line. You out of the way. And hey! At least it's that instead of hatching a murder-for-hire plot!! Eh?
Charlotte
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 571
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 571 |
Glad you did not fall for her temptation so to say.
Yes its her way to deal with her guilt
A way to get herself to say see what I did wasnt to bad attitude
Dont fall for it ...
Married 1996 4 wonderful children 16, 13 *OC*, 10, 7 FWW 30's FWH 30's My dday 1-2007 he came clean to me My story New beginings
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,965
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,965 |
You wanna know, really?
It gets you out of the way. I agree completely. Plus all the other stuff about easing the guilt and normalizing their affair. But mostly it's to get rid of you so you quit "bugging" them.
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,554
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 4,554 |
Plus all the other stuff about easing the guilt and normalizing their affair. But mostly it's to get rid of you so you quit "bugging" them. ...She also might be thinking that it may dissuade you from talking too much about adultery in any D proceedings if you engage in it yourself...
ManInMotion
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(see "MiM's Story" for more details)
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Joined: May 2007
Posts: 2,531
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Joined: May 2007
Posts: 2,531 |
Weird? Not really. My WstbxH not only tried to set me up with OWH, but tried to convince me to move in with him so that - get this - he could afford to pay OW more in child support!!!!  Sorry, but how else do you respond to this? BTW, he was furious that I wouldn't even consider it!
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,496
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,496 |
I recall an IM my FWH had with OW. He had said something to the effect that it would be EASIER if I had found a guy of my own.
So...
Don't make it EASIER for her.
BW(me)
DDay EA 4/05
DDay PA 6/05
In recovery
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150 |
What happens to waywards? Do they get brainectomies? Most of them need to have cranio-rectal extractions.
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Joined: May 2007
Posts: 2,531
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Joined: May 2007
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Cinderella, the more I learn, the more I'm convinced that waywardness is a disease of some sort. There seriously seems to be actual brain damage involved. The symptoms are more consistant from case to case than other well defined psychological diseases like depression and schizophrenia. Someday, there will be a drug or treatment and there may even be tests available for early diagnosis. Until then, better to avoid them in case it's contagious.
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 31
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Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 31 |
I got her good this time. It is so much fun asking her questions about things she does/says. I asked her if I have a lot in common with your best friend it seems you like to be around people that are like us. Her reply was you don't get married to your friends and your not the same as you were when I left. I swear she should go into politics. At least she noticed my Plan A.
BS (ME) 30
WW 27
Started plan A Nov 1st 08
D-Day Nov. 18 08
Still trying to hang on!
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