SugarCane,

Here it is: It's on the recovery forum

Recovery not for the fainthearted

You will see I asked her over and over about exposure.

Chrys said:



Chrys, I made bold an important part in this message from back in Oct 2007

Chrys, I say you go for MAJOR, nuclear exposure.

Do you remember my exposure after our false recovery? On the message board where FWH and OW met? It was MASSIVE.

It ended the A and it marked the beginning of "real" recovery. Dr. H has recently said that he now realizes that exposure marks the beginning of recovery for MOST couples.

You are not going to get the full truth until you expose this disgusting A. I'd get started on this TODAY. Calling OW'sH should be the droppping of your first exposure bomb.

I am so sorry, Chrys...praying for you today.

I see that the advice was crystal clear then, lifeschoice, and since Chrys believed the alleged NC until recently, there was no need to go against it.

Chrys, what do you think you should do about exposure now?

Another point: Dr Harley says in many answers to letters on this web site and in SAA that a change of workplace is necessary in the case of a workplace affair. I understand (or think I do - having no experience of needing special educational provision for a child with special needs) that there are major implications surrounding moving your son to a new school. Are you prepared to do this now?

MelodyLane has an email from Dr Harley posted to a private forum member, in which he states that he is revising SAA and giving more importance to exposure.

So if I understand this correctly, Chewie KNEW that Steve Harley advised against exposure to OWH in October of 2007, which is precisely when he has admitted to getting back in contact with OW...He very coldly used Steve's advice to Chrys against her and took it as license to resume the affair...

I think I'm gonna be sick...

Mrs. W

Don't get sick, Mrs. W, because you are very much needed!

I am trying to wrap my mind around the fact that Chewy accused his wife of making herself unemployable by taking care of her sick child.

And the fact that he calls the OW who is cheating on her husband, "ethereally beautiful".

And the OW had the nerve to email him that she hopes that his wife has enough plastic surgery that he can stand to look at her.

It just boggles my mind that he could think he was in love with the OW.

That was an epic night.

This is still an active adultery and requires exposure.

That's right, Mrs W, and it's also true of all the knowledge that Chewie has gained about MB tools. After D Day 2, he used "openness and transparency" to give Chrys access to his work email and pager, and still continued the affair. Later, when a secret mobile phone was discovered, he gave that up and became even more "transparent" and rarely left the house without either Chrys or his son, but continued the affair. While following the Home Study course he must have been working at "meeting Chrys's ENs", one of which was for honesty, while continuing the affair. A few days ago he had many people here helping him with his list of EPs, while lying and saying that NC was only broken once, in January 2009. And now. after failing the polygraph, he attempted to deflect attention away from his history and its implications by getting help with his NC letter - as if he did not know how to write one, when he wrote one under SH's tutelage with SAA propped up in front of him, a few years ago.

He knows how to display "openness" and "transparent behaviour". He is a MB vet.

S O C I O P A T H

I keep hearing that word over and over in my head as I think of Chewie...

{shudder}

Mrs. W

Yeah. Scares the hell out of me that he's an MD.

"Epic" is right!

Fully agree with exposure.