Hello Believer,

It has always been my hope that she would find a nice Christian husband. Poor Hope has been on this thread for over two years and has missed intimate communion that she had with her husband.

I had been a "virgin" for 38 years and sadly fell to another woman six months before I met the godly woman I was later to marry. I had always hoped that I would be sexually clean before I married.

Definition: "Virgin" meant taking extraordinary care not removing garments during kissing.

I have met too many other Christian folk like myself that had fallen to temptation. This is not my hope for Hope. May she keep her integrity before God.

Hope,

It's been a long time since you were here. What's up girl... :MrEEk:

Hope~ You don't know me but I recently joined MB. But before I joined, I was lurker and I have been following your story for quite some time. What a remarkable person you are.....you are so faithfilled and trusting of our Lord. I am so sorry for the pain and hurt that you have experienced. I wish you every happiness as you continue with your new life. Your story has given me hope that moving forward and trusting God can be done!

Lord, I can't, You can.....I think I'll let You!

Lord, help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that you and I together can't handle.

This is BEAUTIFUL and FULL of WISDOM. Thank you

Hoping we hear something soon. Might be connection problems with the internet, but my take is that she is dating.

Your welcome but I can't take credit for coming up with these....one of my teachers in high school used to put these inspirational quotes on the board daily & these are 2 that have stuck with me 20+ yrs later. (yes, I went to Catholic school...lol)

Hey, I just wanted to be the first person to take this thread into page 100 of the post.

There are a few reasons that could have stopped her mail:

Accident.
Long holiday?
B/F

I agree with believer that B/F is the most obvious. She's been caught out marrying an unbeliever (H#1). If he were of the same faith (and single) I would rejoice.

If it were anybody else I think she would be a little shame faced. She has left clues for me to trace her. She lives in my hometown. I have resisted contact for I would never want to fall into the same trap that her husband did.

Hopenpray do jot a stroke so that we know that your not disabled.

Hi guys!

sorry I've been so quiet lately but I needed to just be still for a while...if that makes any sense...his marriage to OW was a real shocker for me.

Believer, sorry, but theres no gentleman caller in my life!LOL
Actually I haven't been socialising much either..just working a lot of extra shifts...it helped keep me sane and of course the extra money is great!

Faithfamily,I'm flattered that you followed my thread, pity about the ending though!I'm pleased that my faith in God shines through in my posts...remember, God always honours faith....my boys are coming round nicely on their own Christian walk...its true, kids follow your actions not your words...

Queenie,thanks for always popping by!!

Imagine, I hope you are recovering well from your stroke and that the kidney stones have been passed..

Now for an update;

On the 19th Jan,I had a conversation with XH...face to face...
I told him that I was disappointed that our marriage had ended the way it did and that I had hoped that we could have gotten back together.Straight away he started blaming me saying that the times he wanted to come home I would do/say something that would make him change his mind.He used the PBL as an example, he saw it as me trying to control him and that he couldn't contact me but it was fine for me to contact him whenever I felt like it (another reason NOT to break plan B!..)

Also that I had given him a hard time when he needed the loan.He saw that as me not loving him!!I reminded him that he was cheating on me and living with another woman at the time...he just doesn't see his faults...could this still be blamed on the fog???

When I asked him why he married her,he said they had been talking about how things are easier when one is married and they just decided on the spur of the moment.....he said its easier to open accounts together and quote, "its not nice living with someone,you know I like to be married"?????

After blaming me for everything once again...he proceeded to say that he was so happy that I was talking to him and that he wants us to be FRIENDS...
He told me that he had spent half his life with me and that I was: intelligent,level-headed,grounded and that I give good advice!!
Now the funny thing about this statement,besides the fact that he'd just contradicted everything he'd just spewed out of his mouth about me....is that from what my boys tell me the OW is....
these are my boys words..."she has tantrums,sulks,cries very easily and is not very intelligent...

I think he gave away all the ENs that she is not able to meet!!!

Now for the grand finale!!!!

XH:If we don't communicate how will we ever know if we'll get back together again?
ME:dumb-founded???what do you mean by that?
XH:You never know what will happen tomorrow???

I just shook my head at him as I was speechless....

Since that day I've spoken to him twice on the phone,once he called to ask if it was ok for DS16 to go to a party ,and the other was more explosive!
DS16 was on the phone to him and I asked him by the way to ask XH when he was putting the money in my account,he was 3 days late.My tone was not nasty..well he told DS16 to tell me not to pass messages about money via the boys...

I phoned him after DS16 had finished talking to him and explained that I wasn't been nasty and that I meant no malice and that the kids never knew he was late with his payment.Well, he went off at me saying I only think of myself etc...he ended up putting the phone down on me saying he was about to tranfer it that afternoon but now I'll have to just wait!
He paid me the next day....

The funny thing is that he is so worried the boys are going to think badly of him for being 3 days late with a payment, but he is oblivious to the things they have seen and heard him do these past 2 years...he has no idea of the respect his boys have lost for him already...so sad..

We have a new addition to the family....a 7 week Siberian Husky...DS19(was his birthday yesterday) is over the moon...a friends dog had puppies and I thought it would be a good idea for all of us..my cat is not too pleased though!

Believer, DS16 has had several big fights with OW and once she told XH she wanted DS16 to apologise to her and he wouldn't...
He has told his dad that his loyality lies with ME and not with XH!!!

DS19 has been staying at home to look after the puppy so he hasn't been to XH for a while. His girlfriend is in her final year of school and she is not allowed to see DS19 during the week either so I'm relieved cos I thought he would spent more time with XH to be close to his girlfriend as she lives 3 roads away from XH.

Also, XH has caused a huge split in his own family cos of his remarriage...its a long story...but it just shows what a ripple effect a divorce has on everyone..

With this all being said...I still love him and wish this hadn't ended this way...

Faithfamily, I was also bought up in the Catholic Church although I don't go anymore.Some things about being Catholic never leave you...which is a good thing in many ways.....

Lovely to hear your voice Hope. Thanks for asking about my body parts. We are all doing fine.

Yeah, I'm another character from a primary convent school. The discipline and love there was fabulous. I wandered off to CESA. You know, St James equivalent.

A lot of you fans will be glad to here from you.

I don't know, h&p...sounds pretty hinky to me.

Maybe he enjoyed the thrill of his affair so much that he wants to have another one with you now.

I think he's full of [censored]...but that's just IMO.

Tread carefully in these shark-infested waters.

Charlotte

DM, you crack me up! I agree with you 100%

He's whole life is centered around his shop now....this is his no.1 priority....I truly think that if they weren't working together they wouldn't have lasted.XH can't afford to employ anyone else so he depends on her help.She,in turn depends on him for everything....she doesn't even have a car....

Time will tell....but for me.....I'll stay as dark as possible and will get on with my life...which, in fact, is pretty good at the moment.

Aha!


Yep


Sorry girl, it's all about HIM getting satisfaction

How's his Christian walk coming? What happened at the Kimberley excursion? Is he still going to Dubai?


We'll wait for the details!


You'll make some dude very happily married. I acknowledge your loyalty.

So good to hear from you again. I was certain that you had found a gentleman caller!

I was raised Catholic/Quaker - nothing like it for good morals. Went to Catholic schools through college.

Sounds to me like now that hubby has remarried, there is an opening for an OW. He would very much like YOU to meet all the needs SHE isn't meeting. YIKES!

Believer, do you think he could still be "fogged out"?I couldn't believe how the characteristics he named in me filled the ENs that OW can't meet!

I asked the boys what does XH do when she has tantrums etc..they say he just tells her to calm down and walks away...

You mentioned that it took your XH 7 months after you were divorced, to wake up.Why do you think it sometimes takes a D to make them see things for what they are? Do you think the OW shows their true colors or what?

He has started asking DS16 what have WE been doing lately....he answers...just chillin....!!!I told him thats the perfect answer to give him...

Now that you have reached the 100th page number, have you thought of a title change to this thread?

Who knows why they do what they do? I think it is like Frank Pittman says, they feel guilty, they have high expectations because of the sacrifices they made, and they don't trust their affair partner.

My ex and his OW broke up less than 2 weeks after our D was final. Since I was in Plan B, I hadn't talked to him for months. Then over several months time, he started writing me letters, which I read, but they were the same old thing. After 7 months, he started showing up at my home, calling me at work, wanting to talk.

That is when he started begging me to get back with him. It went on for a year, but now he is starting to get the point that I don't want him.

However, I never really got any details on why they broke up, and neither did the OW's ex-husband.

Just know that the odds are against them. Only 3% get married, and 75% of them get divorced. Add a blended family, and they have zero chance.

I'm sure you could try to win him back, but advise against it. He is still foggy. One day, all on his own, he will realize the enormity of the mistake he made.

My ex used to argue to me that we HAD the perfect marriage, he messed up, he fought for so long to marry me, we were soulmates, blah, blah, blah.

I suggest you continue living a good life, and give him time to crash and burn.

I thought the last few lines of Believers post had a nice thread ring to it!

LOL Imagine........... It is amazing how all of these affairs end up the same way.

Believer, I absolutely agree that WH is still in fog.