I am really not sure what to do now. my husband filed for d after being seperated for a year. there was another woman. i dont know if she is still around. he went between the both of us until he finally filed at the end of december. My lawyer answered and his lawyer has done nothing. His lawyer has been sent several letters and several phone calls have been made to his lawyer to try and find out their response. I was told the next step my lawyer will take is to file for mediation. She said in her experience when this happens usually the other lawyer hasnt been paid or has dropped their client.

I am afraid of being played again by him because we had tried to reconcile before and it fell apart because the other woman was still in the background. he is being really nice saying our child needs to see this and trying to get along with me. he wont argue with me and if something bothers me he is quick to apologize. he will say its about our child but puts the caring feelings out there for me. he will say stuff about it had to start somewhere so we could move forward, if i get upset he says i never do anything right for you, if i ask him to stay away so i can have breathing room from him he will get mad then and say he isnt staying away because he is going to be a part of his childs life. he started coming back to church.

he got upset that my lawyer told me to have no contact with him unless there was an emergency or problem with our child. i explained she wants to make sure nothing happens until this is over and she never meant that for our child. he gets upset that i have more time with our child but we are going by the parenting plan he chose and he only asked for 78 days a year. our child is a teenager and was told if he wants to see his dad then call him and ask to see his dad. i said i wouldnt stop that. i feel he is old enough to make that decision. if he does get mad and says something he is quick to apologize. i have been accused of keeping our child from him and i have done no such thing. i reminded him that we have a teenager now.

he has done nothing to stop the divorce or say he doesnt want it so i am letting my lawyer proceed forward with mediation. i did confront him and ask what was going on. he said he didnt know and he hasnt heard from his lawyer. i tried to ask him a couple of questions and he refused to talk about it. all he would say is its funny his lawyer said the same thing and hasnt heard from my lawyer. i know this is false because she sent them a letter stating he couldnt show up at my house any longer unless he was invited due to a problem that had occured. so i am really not sure where to go from here or what to think because i refuse to get hope again and then have it crushed. my hope is not in him and i have no trust in him.

WH filed for divorce in July, but wanted to go to mediation. I refused, preferring to work through lawyers. I was also offended that he tried to have me go to the same one OW used to end her marriage -- thinking I did not know this. What a pig. I hired a junkyard dog of a lawyer in response.

We have almost set up a parenting plan btwn our attorneys, but he will not finalize it. After my attorney repeatedly tried to reach his, she finally admitted that he won't respond to her either.

So, now he bought a house with OW and is wearing a wedding ring. He apparently has no conscience, integrity, nor respect for marriage, so it actually makes sense.

Being around him sends ice water up and down my veins, rather than the comfort and love I used to feel. I don't know why yours is stalling, and perhaps he doesn't know either. But if you want him back, I wish you the best.

thanks. im sorry to hear about your situation. no i no longer want him back. i think he just was looking for a way to cake eat again. he has flip flopped for the past year. son and i were finally moving on and finding happiness and making a life. i dont know if he saw this and thought we were out there to far.

so he started coming back making it all about son being nice to me and putting a hint of feelings out there for me. i asked if he still loved me and he said he didnt know how to answer that yet and can we leave it at that. he wouldnt argue. he would get upset and say stuff like i never can do anything right for you if i was upset. he bought son a valentines card for me. he did that but ignored my birthday.

i feel like an idiot letting him in just a little. for some reason i got that gut feeling back and couldnt shake it and it nawed at me. well yesterday he apparently didnt tell his mom and the ow where he was and they rang his phone off the hook. she was calling him and his mother called and said her and the ow were looking for him. he had given me access to all this info back when we were trying to reconcile in sept. that fell apart ow in the background.

i confronted him and i blew up. big mistake. i should have just let it go because my gut feeling went away. i should have just said i heard the messages and you need to go and not come back. he tries to use son against me and says im using son against him. ive told him that he needs to be calling son and son is a teenager and can call him if he wants to. i said you need to leave me out of it.

i told him i agree with you now our m is dead and its over and its just time to end things. i said your mom paid for your lawyer can you just borrow the money from her to go to mediation. he said no i cant and had his lawyer push it back a month out.

the harder i fight to get him out the harder he fights to stay in and i cant figure out why and now i just want it over. its time to move on and he cant seem to understand this. he asks me questions about myself personally. thats none of his business anymore. i told him this is d and he will have to accept it that we will have to split time between us with our child. he is old enough that if he wants more time he can use the phone and call.

he said so you wont work with me or try to get along with me for son. i said right now the best thing for s is for us to avoid each other and have no contact. i said when this is over and we have all moved on then i will try to be civil with you and get along with except with ow. i said i will never except her and s said he wouldnt either.

of course he lied about it all. i did call his mom out on it. i was furious. i called her and said you and the ow can quit looking for him he is with our s working out. i didnt even give her a chance to say anything and hung up. he didnt let them know his whereabouts and they couldnt stand it.

i just told him we stick to our times and he got mad. i said no reason to get mad you chose the parenting plan we are going by. it just leads to other excuses. i finally said im sorry but this is over and its time to let go and move on. i said i was given advice to let you go and move on and thats what im doing. he didnt like hearing that. why is what i dont understand. he is doing everything he can to keep his double life.