|
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
JT, let's talk and figure out if we can hook up and go into Seattle together or meet somewhere.
It's for sure been a hectic week.
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,698
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,698 |
It's for sure been a hectic week. Thats something I can relate to. Queenie and JT, I hope we can meet up end of the week. I am getting real excited about possibly meeting people. Of course I am silly enough to be getting excited about flying so far LOL
Recovered marriage, recovering self, life gets better everyday
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,149 |
Absolutely-maybe we can meet in Bellevue and drive to Seattle together for an MB " reunion" of sorts. (Not sure what to call it, since we have "met" but haven't "met". )
johnstwin-
"I may not know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future." -Martin Luther
Remarried my FXH 25 years to the day of our first M. God is so good-and sometimes so unexpected!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,698
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,698 |
You know where I am at 
Recovered marriage, recovering self, life gets better everyday
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,873
Member
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,873 |
Hi Queenie, I realized tonight, I LIKE my life. I almost am GLAD I don't have to answer to anyone. I pretty much come and go as I please and I like that. Hmmm. Maybe I am NOT so ready for him to come home.... Dropping by for support....don't need much advice!  I would agree, WS is showing some cracks... but until OP is totally out of the picture and WS decides he needs and will get help.... gotta stay DARK and FAR AWAY from him!
XBW DS16 & DS22 PLAN D: finalized!
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463 |
Mornign, I just wanted to let you know what an awesome job I think you are doing...
Staying dark, not getting TOO hopeful, etc...
keep climbing lady! you've got some major class!
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 674
Member
|
Member
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 674 |
Queenie you are a real GODDESS!! I'm praying for you.....
I know very little about Purin, only what I have read in the Book of Ester.When are the actual days of fasting?
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,058
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,058 |
Hope,
I answered this origianlly, but the answer was really incomplete, so I deleted it and will let Queenie give the full answer if she chooses to do so. Purim is really celebrated twice...
Queenie,
Remember that Esther didn't know what was going to happen. In fact her name is related to the word for hidden. And the book that is read, Megillat Esther, contains a form of the word megaleh, which means "to reveal." So the story is really one of the revealing of things hidden.
When Esther's turn before the king came along, she asked for nothing, that is, none of the usual cosmetics or other things designed to enhance her real beauty. She turned down the riches and pleasures of the world to continue to work on what really mattered, her spiritual growth and a relationship with God.
Esther had no way of knowing that she would become Queen of the empire or that she would someday be in a position where she could save her people. All she knew was that her relationship with the KING of the Universe was most important. But God knew…
When the time came for her to act, Esther was ready because she had focused on what was important and right. It was only after the fact that it was revealed to all what her role was in saving her people.
And when her own life was in danger, and that of her people, she fasted to get even closer to God. She gave up the physical for the spiritual and by doing so became an inspiration even today.
Focus on what is most important, Queenie. Stay focused on God and let Him set the stage for when it is time for you to act.
Mark
Last edited by Mark1952; 03/03/09 01:20 PM.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
Focus on what is most important, Queenie. Stay focused on God and let Him set the stage for when it is time for you to act. I hear ya Mark, I hear ya and that's what I have been doing. I took a few days away to heal a little deeper. My cookies came out amazing, they were light brown, could have used a little more jam in the middle, but the shapes were nice. Not too many looking female parts at all. :RollieEyes: My YS made varsity tonight on lacrosse. Woohoo... Even though he said it was NO BIG deal, I knew otherwise. He made it in one year where it took OS three years. I know that has to be working on his ego. My OS is starting his new job next week and it looks like he might even be promoted to asst. mgr. I know that must feel good to him. My daughter... ah... she just is living life and plugging along the way. Nothing from WH. I would be lying if I hadn't hoped a little, but you know. I REALLY dont' LIKE this person at all and give it a day and I'm used to Plan B and pushing thoughts of him out of my head. I'm happier that way. The reading of the megillah is Friday night. I have to admit, I only fast on Yom Kippur. This is actually one of the happiest holidays of the Jewish calendar. I have to read the prayer that we are to say on Friday night, very serious and very humbly. So, life goes on....  ing to G-d to show me the path... Because it's just safer, better, more loving and kinder that way...
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
Well, WH confirmed to DD that crack ho is gone and he won't be in touch because it's her computer and she is coming to GET HER CRAP FINALLY. He said that the rest is up to G-d. I imagine he meant coming home.
He told her that drinking and using wasn't an option nor was suicide. He said he would look into help if he could afford it.
He told her that if he wasn't in touch with her for awhile, to not worry. He loved her and missed her.
So, what is happening for me - NOTHING. It's complete. He knows there is a path home, he knows I love him, but now the work for him begins. He has no children, no computer, no wife, no lacrosse and only himself and his job oh and his EGO.
It's the strangest thing. I have NO NEED, DESIRE or anything to get involved, fix or interfere. He is with G-d and that's all that matters.
My prayers are with him as he hopefully finds his journey with G-d and finds the happiness he so DESPERATELY is seeking. I love him so much. Please pray for him...
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,116
Member
|
Member
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,116 |
When is your next court date, Queenie?
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
ah, that would be tomorrow.
but WH and I NEVER met, NEVER resolved anything and I haven't heard ONE THING from the A, so I guess it's not happening?
I'm not pushing for anything. I'm staying as still and dark as possible...
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 5,463 |
Well, we will see...
the red flag for me is the part about him getting help IF he can afford it!
If you have a program you don't need money!
Where is the cost in that?
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 4,652
Member
|
Member
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 4,652 |
me - 47  H - 39  married 2001 DS 8a  DS 8b :crosseyedcrazy: (Why is DS7b now a blockhead???) (Ack! Now he's not even a blockhead, just a word! That's no fun!)
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
That's just it, he doesn't GET IT that he DOESN'T have a program.
He has NO IDEA he is an addict in a dry drunk. BUT this is HIS journey not mine. I can only pray he gets there.
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
Thanks Jayne, WH is the one who needs the prayers. His soul in in for the battle.
My life is with G-d.....
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
Member
|
Member
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455 |
Queenie, checking in on your sitch. Hang tight and tighter to your faith. I feel that the ice in your WH veins is starting to thaw. Hope first that WH gets the help he needs and then takes that flashlight and follows that small beam of light little by little to find his way home.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years D17, D30 alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08 Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also) H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08 Plan B 1/09 D final 12/09
Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 2,390
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 2,390 |
Queenie, A big  for you. If crack-ho can stay out of the picture long enough, maybe he'll hit bottom and realize what he did. We can only hope.... Praying for you.
BS - me 56 XWH - 57
12/25/06 - Dday - WH promised NC. Plan A in effect. Thought we were in recovery.
6-3-07 - Dday#2 Found out NC never took place and A never ended. Found MB NC promised again, but WH would not write NC letter.
9/07 - Dday #3. Still lying and sneaking around. Plan B implemented WH wants nothing to do with me
Divorced as of 12/09 after 36 years
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 189
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 189 |
I am  for you Queenie!!
Me 48 XWAW 42 M 18Y D day 9/14/08 Plan A&B for months One false R DS12 (my life) DD23 D Final 5-14-09
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 6,643 |
Thank Chai, Hope and Kick, I had a somewhat meltdown tonight and called JT, thank you JT for showing me the path to the psalm that is right for me tonight. DD has been emailing WH back and forth tonight. So here's where we are at. She asked him why the change of heart, his response was which change of heart. She emailed back - crack ho. His response... DD That was the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life! I can never make up for what I did. But I cant live the mistake either.I dont know if you will understand that but I hope you can. Love Dad DD's response Well it just concerns me that your not being truthful. I mean from what OS told mom was that she was with you over the weekend. and I'm just concerned that I don't want to get hurt again. If your really serious about getting your life back on track and doing what is best for you then I will be there for you. But if your just pulling my chain and she isn't out of your life then I'm not going to be to happy about. Your my father and I will always love you but right now you need help with whatever demons you have in your closet. Mom says AA might be a place for you to start I know it helped her. Let me know how things are going and what your going to do. I love you dad but don't disappoint me again. I can only do so much for you with the boys but I wont go to bat for you if the facts aren't true. So I'm left with so much emotion, and I'll admit my faith took a dip tonight, but I prayed and called JT and she helped me work through just giving my love to G-d and just leave it alone. I have this urge to get him to see how I'm different, but that's the OLD ME. So like JT reminded me about Abraham, I have to walk in FAITH and TRUST and do what I KNOW I need to do. Give WH to G-d and give the love I cherish and hold for my H to G-d and let him take care of him. It's killing me smalls..... 
BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84 D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09 WH and OW broke up 1-09 Started over 7-09
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
0 members (),
249
guests, and
56
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,621
Posts2,323,490
Members71,959
|
Most Online3,185 Jan 27th, 2020
|
|
|
|